Make Believe
by melodramatic cliches
Summary: SEQUEL TO THE PRETENDERS, Eli Goldsworthy's words don't comfort his daughter Julia Goldsworthy as she enters her grade 11 year at Degrassi with a harboring crush on a family rival, also marital problems for Eli and Clare when a tragedy strikes the lovers.
1. Thunderstorms

**WARNING: thundering storms, piercing, NEW GENERATIONS, "Fits", possible siblings && teddy bears!**

**RED ALERT! This is a SEQUEL to my Eclare story The Pretenders, read that first or the epilogue to understand the story, although I recommend to read the whole story to get back story and concepts! Thank yous!**

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**Chapter One: Thunderstorms (Julia's POV)**

**I love thunderstorms. It doesn't matter where or when it happens, I'll sit on my window sill and stare at the lightning bolts streak across the grey sky. I pulled my knees to my chest and rested my chin on my knees, I felt my thick chocolate brown hair fall into my face, I quickly shook it away. I could lightly see my reflection in the glass. I looked like my father. Mom has always said I did, I had his hair, his face, the Goldsworthy smirk, but what stands out when people meet me is my emerald eyes. I'm the only one of my siblings who inherited them. I felt like an outcast during dinner, at least Dad was there too, we couldn't be brought down by the oceans of reddish brown heads, besides Willow who inherited Mom's curls, but Dad's dark brown hair. Besides common Goldsworthy looks, My nose was pierced as was my lip. I wanted to look this way. Mom flipped seeing me come home with Yvonne who got a belly button piercing with Fiona's consent. Dad didn't say much besides that maybe the lip ring was too much. I didn't talk to either of them for weeks. Until Dad cracked under pressure having no one to really bond with. We have all sorts of heart to hearts. I guess its safe to say that I'm closer to my father than my mother. Mom doesn't really mind since she's closer to Willow, while Bentley being the baby of the family has attention of Mom and Dad whenever he pleases. I glanced at the clock noticing that it was 2 am. I sighed heavily and rubbed my eyes. I couldn't sleep through beautiful thunderstorms like these. I solely blame Dad, when I was younger I'd cry out at the thunder, I would climb into bed next to Dad where he force me, wait scratch that I was a stubborn child so he'd flip me over his shoulder and sit at the window sill with me on his lap. He told me that thunderstorms were nothing to be afraid of..**

**"_It's okay Jules." Dad murmured into my hair. "No.." I argued. I buried my face into his cotton grey shirt. "Just look Jules." Dad insisted. I lifted my quivering face and looked as a streak of light struck the sky. "No!" I yelped. "Please daddy. Don't!" I pleaded, I felt the tears stream down my face and I buried my face deeper into his chest, his grip on me tightening. "I'm not leaving Jules.. Julia just look. Please." Dad begged in a soft voice. I gulped and looked onto to see the rolling grey clouds and more golden streaks across the sky. I felt the tears being wiped from my eyes by rough thumbs. "Pretty." I whispered, my interest in them increasing by the moment. "Like you Julia. Every time you see a thunderstorm, just think of me and you. Think of happy thoughts. That's what thunderstorms are all about. Beauty allowing memories to flow." Dad explained. I nodded and leaned into his embrace around me. "Will you stay up with me?" I asked, I turned my head to see him smirk. "Of course sweetheart." Dad murmured._**

**I smiled thinking of the happy memories. Thinking of how right he truly was. Suddenly a loud crash was heard. I jolted upward, the sound was coming down the hall, Mom and Dad's room. I could hear shouts and screams. The voice was Dad's, I could tell. I covered my ears like Dad had told me to during his fits. I could hear his blood curdling screams stream through the house. I hated his fits. Most of all I hated how I didn't know what causes them. Mom won't budge and neither will Dad. His fits could last from a couple minutes to hours until Mom's needle knocks him out. He has a disease. A disease I've been trying to figure out since I was five and Dad had one unexpectedly in front of me. His body trembling as he said through clenched teeth for me to run. Run to my room, lock the door and cover my ears. I did exactly so. Mostly after his fits he wears a thick wrap around his forearm, covering a thick red scar, Mom has one also, only its faded and is barely noticeable to her other scars on her face, arms, chest and legs. I know that usually Dad must hurt Mom during the fits, causing her cuts, he won't touch her until they heal and he heals as well. I never understood, my Dad loved Mom. They still have sex every Friday night after seeing a movie. Okay.. So maybe that was too much information. The screams had stopped. I uncovered my ears and heard ragged breathing. Dad's. "Eli.. Eli you have to calm down.." Mom's soothing voice said. I listened intently as Dad's breathing became slower to where I could no longer hear it. There was no longer any more screams or sounds besides Mom walking down the hall into the bathroom where we carry a lifetime supply of wrapping bandages and bacteria cleaner. Of course tomorrow morning no one will say anything and no one will even second glance at Dad's wrapped bandage or Mom's new scar. We knew something was wrong. Me, Will and Bent all knew. Of course the thoughts of that would be pushed by mind because tomorrow I'll be looking forward to having a hangout with Yvonne, Victoire and the new guy.. Teddy. I smiled at his cutesy name. Never had a met a Teddy, but he was cute. Very easy on the eyes. Those big brown eyes that Bethany seems to have as well. As I thought about it.. Those two could pass for brother and sister if they wanted too. I would have no thoughts over Mom and Dad.. I'd think of Y, Vic and Teddy. After many minutes I found myself in my bed, cuddling a.. Teddy bear.**

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**KNOCK KNOCK! I'm here! Here's the new sequel to The Pretenders! Make Believe (Ironic title) I quite enjoyed seeing into Julia's mind, seeing how she view her parents and Eli's problem.. A problem she or her siblings know nothing of. I do plan to switch view from Julia to Eli or Clare back to Julia and possibly Teddy, maybe Yvonne at times. If any are wondering this takes place during summer and Julia and Yvonne are best friends (much like Eli and Adam) Victoire sometimes hangs with them and Teddy might be a regular. && If any are wondering if that cutesy Bethany will show up.. SHE WILL! Only now she's older and much of KC/Jenna clone. XD. && Please don't forget to..**

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	2. Seven Scars

**WARNING: scars of memories, trashed relationship, sneering eli's, METRIC! Every scar there! Locking kissses! && bad words!**

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**Chapter Two: Seven Scars (Clare's POV)**

**I squinted as the morning sun was blinding me through the slit between the two brown curtains covering glass windows. I turned away and rolled onto my back, I could feel the immediate soreness on my shoulders from last night. I winced softly as I rubbed the sore shoulder Eli shook hard during his episode. Like always I have a hand outreached to help him and he grabs onto my shoulders furiously. I turned my head looking at him now. The covers covering his rising body as he took shaky breaths. I sat up slowly to get a better look at him. His thick brown hair was a mess around his head and I still remember the blood vessels breaking in his emeralds from strain. I allowed my hand to skim his face, feeling the cool touch of his skin. He doesn't understand that after all these years of marriage, that I could stand the sight of him. Deal with the horrific episodes that send his body into fury and agitation. I bent down and broke his rule of no touching after episodes, and swiftly pecked his cheek. He let out a moan before moving his body slowly before going back to sleep. "Have a good day's rest Eli." I murmured as I pressed my lips to his cracked dry ones and moistened them with a kiss. He didn't budge. I smiled and swung my legs over the edge of the bed, slipping my slippers on, I proceeded to the curtains, closing the gap to allow no light to awaken Eli. I gave his slumbering body one last glance before silently slipping from the room. I walked down the hallway, checking Bentley's room to see him asleep with his thumb in his mouth as he clutched at a teddy bear. I checked Willow's next and saw that she fell asleep with a book on her chest. I bookmarked the page and set it silently by her bedside. I covered her small body with the sheets and gave her swift kiss on the cheek. After slipping from that room, I proceeded to Julia's. To my surprise she wasn't in bed like a usual summer morning she enjoys sleeping in. I furrowed my brows and walked down the stairs. To my astonishment Julia was at the breakfast table, dressed in a Metric shirt with purple skinny jeans and combat boots. She had on Eli's guitar pick necklace and even his skull ring on her thumb. Her dark brown hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail, only a purple plastic bow stuck in there. She wore her makeup heavily, her eyeliner thick and eye shadow being a midnight black. Her lip ring laid on the table as she ate her cereal quickly, taking my word of eating without the snake bite. "Good morning Jules." I said in a tired voice as I passed by her to the refrigerator to grab eggs. "Mornin' mom." Julia said in a muffled voice as she shoved two mouthfuls into her mouth. "Take a bite at a time Jules. Don't swallow the spoon, We only have one set." I scolded with a smirk. Julia returned the smirk like a true Goldsworthy before taking a slow bite. "Now why the rush on a summers day?" I questioned while cracking eggs. Julia shrugged. "Out to see Y and Vicky today. Maybe Teddy." Julia said Teddy's name rather quickly. "Do you like Teddy, Jules?" I quipped. Julia shook her head. "No. Y likes him though. I think he likes her. Y wants to go out with him." Julia informed me. "Oh." There was silence after that. There was me and my daughter's conversation for today. I wanted to ask her more. Did she like Teddy, KC's son. KC.. My ex boyfriend… My abuser. I shook my head. Julia didn't need to know this. Neither did Willow or Bentley. All three of them will live a perfect life without knowing me and Eli's past with KC. I didn't want to wreck Julia's timid friendship with Teddy, he seemed polite, shaking my hand and shaking Eli's hand also. I could tell by Teddy's look, Eli's handshake was more firm than useful. Thoughts interrupted by footsteps. I turned my head to see Eli walking in. His eyes were bloodshot, heavy bags underneath. I took a quick glance at the wrapped bandage around his forearm. The red scar. If the bandage were to be unwrapped and the scar hadn't been forced open by vicious fingernails than it would glisten in the sun. I noted that Julia took a quite glance before her face was back at the cereal. "Good morning Eli." I said quietly while flipping eggs. "Good morning Clare." Eli retorted in more of a sneering tone. Was he seriously going to play the sneering game? Eli proceeded towards the coffee machine, grabbing a cup and was about to pour a cup before I turned my head, "You know that since you have your medication in your system that you can't take coffee. Don't try to sneak a fast one by me." I said, returning my attention to the eggs. Eli slammed the cup down in aggravation and I glanced at him seriously. Julia turned her face toward Eli and cowered over her cereal. "Elijah." I scowled. "Behave." I added in a serious voice. Eli glared at me under his lashes with the glazed eyes that held no love. He was part sane and insane. He needed more sleep to sleep off the insane side. Before I knew it he was walking away and I turned around and placed my hands on my hips. "Where are you going?" I snipped. Great. Now I'm the snippy wife. Eli turned his head and sneered. "In the living room. Where my wife won't bother the living fuck out of me." He looked straight and walked into the living room. "Julia want any-" I turned to see that Julia was already gone. Her bowl half eaten and her chair left out. I saw Morty's car keys were off the hook. "Great. Now I drive my daughter away." I muttered to myself as I was thinking of how much of a great mother I am to Julia opposed to Willow and Bentley.**

**I took hesitant steps into the living room. Eli sat on the loveseat with his feet propped onto the coffee table, he had the channel on MTV. A teenager at heart. "I brought you tea." I murmured softly. Silence. "Your allowed to have this. You like it after episodes in the morning." Eli turned his head slightly and looked up at me with his true emeralds. "Thank you." Eli murmured in his velvet voice. I smiled and handed him the cup of tea and took a hesitant seat by him, leaving a bit of space. After a couple of sips, Eli set it on the end table and I could feel his eyes on me as I pretended to watch Marianas Trench. "Any new scars?" Eli asked softly. I shrugged. "My shoulders sore, you rattled me last night." I admitted. Eli scoffed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Can I at least check your shoulders?" Eli whispered in a ragged voice. I nodded and leaned forward, shrugging my robe off, feeling the tense pain. "Fuck." Eli muttered. "Is it bad?" I murmured. Eli sighed. "Bruises. Huge purple bluish handprints." Eli sneered. I sighed and turned my attention to him. "Don't beat yourself over this Eli. It happens every once in a while." I reminded him. Eli shook his head. "Its more than that. I always hurt you someway. I remember what each scar is." Eli admitted. I furrowed my brows as he drawled on about every scar. "The one above your eyebrow is when I attempted to claw your oceans out. The one on your chin is when I tried to attack you when you strapped me down to the bed." Eli remembered. I shuddered remembering how ravaged his face was. "The was across your chest is when I tried to claw your heart out. You needed stitches and the doctor recommended you needed to stay away from me. I agreed." Eli murmured. I scoffed. "I sure as heck didn't." Eli ignored my words and continued on the scars. "The long scar on your arm is when I grabbed onto your arm during an episode at Declan and Holly J's wedding. The one on the inside of your wrist is when I broke your wrist when I tried to break you piece from piece." Eli continued, his voice more pained with each scar told story. "The one on your stomach is when I tried to claw Julia from your stomach when you were pregnant. I couldn't live with myself after that." Eli whispered. I closed my eyes remembering how he had been gentling touching Julia, feeling her kicks when he started clawing, causing Julia to stir inside of me in pain. "The one on your leg is when I tried to bite your leg and wounded up taking a chunk of your skin off." Eli was barely audible now. "Now you'll have a bruise to remember me by. Your abusive husband." Eli murmured. I could feel the tears sting as I heard his choked sobs from his chest. "I don't want to hurt your body or mind anymore. I hate myself a little more each time." Eli admitted. I clutched onto Eli's arm, ignoring his immeaditeate flinch and with my other hand, I turned his face towards mine and pressed my lips to his. Trying to store the scary memories into a case.. Locking it with a kiss.**

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**Oh Clare Goldsworthy. We needed your thoughts! Intense shit here. Excuse my French. XD I show more into the family as Clare and Julia's relationship isn't very good, Clare and Eli's marriage during his episodes. I even showed Clare's scars she received after Eli's attacks. She'll be covered with more. Spoiler? In case anyone is wondering Metric is an indie band which I LOVE, I have all their songs on my iPod and just love their songs. Amazing shit there. I figured Julia would be the one to inherit Eli's things, like his guitar pick necklace, skull ring and even Morty! LONG LIVE MORTY! Gahh I love that hearse! Sorry for my ramblings! I shall post next in either Julia or Teddy's POV! As for now au revior (sp?) && Don't forget too..**

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	3. Oak Tree

**WARNING: oak trees! Headphones, eclares history, victoire bitchiness && Yvonne's glares with Teddy's slight smiles!**

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**Chapter Three: Oak Tree (Julia's POV)**

**I sat under the oak tree in Lincoln Park with my headphones over my ears, blasting loud music of rebellion and angst mixed into metal music. My eyes were closed as I shrunk into the trunk of the oak tree, I hate the sun, I used to be Dad's little vampire, I would enjoy staying inside with him while Mom would be outside gardening with Willow and Bentley would play with anything. Dad. I sighed heavily thinking of his grumpy attitude towards Mom this morning. I quickly noted of his heavily bandaged forearm, my imagination going long at the thought of what happened to his arm. Why he has a long ugly red scar running from the inside of his elbow to the inside of his wrist. Why Mom has scars on her face, her whole body. Why at times when they believe me, Willow or Bentley aren't watching, Mom would kiss Dad's scar, in return he'll kiss all her seven scars before kissing her parted lips. I was fascinated by my parents. Unlike Yvonne and Victoire who could care less what new fashion item Fiona was buying and what new comic book Adam ordered. My parents had history. They had a back-story worth reading for hours. I want to know how they became this mess of beauty who acts like teenagers in love. Although so does Adam and Fiona. Possibly Alli and Dave also. I know it. They all went to school together, that I knew, they were all friends and managed to stay that way for more than twenty years. All had history that tied with Mom and Dad's. A history I needed to find out before they die and take their secrets to the grave. A small acorn thumped against my forehead, bouncing onto my lap. I furrowed my brows and pulled the headphones off, grabbing the acorn and hearing giggles. I looked up to see Yvonne and Victoire standing before me. Yvonne with a goofy grin and Victoire with a small smile that says _I know I'm a rich bitch. _This is why me and Victoire aren't that great of friends. "Zoning out to dead hand Jules?" Yvonne teased. I smirked. "You bet Y. Sit down. You too Vicky." I added adding a twitch of insanity to my look. The good thing of being a Goldsworthy is having the look of being insane. Dad certainly had it, and Aunt Lizzy, I'd never seen Grandma Caroline with it, although when I ask where Grandpa Goldsworthy is, Dad goes rigid and walks off mumbling about dead beat fathers. Then I proceed to ask where my other Grandpa Edwards is, Mom always says that he just lives elsewhere. Elsewhere as in he divorces Grandma Helen and packs his bags up and leaves. Safe to say that I can live without a Grandpa. More history with Dad. The history I die to know. "Hello? Earth to Julia Anne Goldsworthy." Yvonne teased. I snapped from my reverie and shook my head. "Yeah Y?" I asked dazed. "Did you not hear me?" Yvonne questioned. Guilty I shook my head. Yvonne sighed heavily like her mother Fiona when she has nothing new to wear. "I was talking about Teddy." Yvonne said, her tone more soft. I felt this twinge in my stomach. I ignored the twinge to hear Yvonne about Teddy. "What about Teddy?" I quipped stuffing my iPod in my pocket. "I just think he's really cute." Yvonne crooned with a smile. Victoire rolled her eyes. "Please Yvonne. Grandmother wouldn't approve of Teddy, neither would Uncle Declan and Aunt Holly J." Victoire retorted. I rolled my eyes at Victoire's comment, I looked at Yvonne's sad expression. "Don't listen to Vicky, Y. Just go for it." I ushered. Yvonne shook her head, clearly upset by her fraternal twin sister's comment. I raised my brows at her and quickly threw the acorn at Victoire's pointy nose. Victoire gasped and scowled. "Juvenile." Victoire hissed. I smirked. "Serious juvenile shit, eh?" I drawled in my Canadian accent. "I'm so out." Victoire said as she rose from the grass. "I'll be hanging with Jeanette and Lyla." Victoire left with her pointy nose in the air and trotted off. "Can you believe Mom and Dad gave birth to two completely different people?" Yvonne quipped quickly. I shrugged. "Look at Willow, Bentley and me. Willow enjoys school work, Bentley enjoys playing with paper airplanes and myself.. Well I enjoy kicking my Dad's ass at Guitar Hero." I admitted with a gusty laugh. Yvonne joined in. "Same here. Dad's comic collection is amazing." Yvonne said with a smile. There was a bout of silence. "Y? Do you ever wonder about our parents?" I asked in a timid voice. Yvonne shrugged. "My parents aren't interesting. My Mom's the daughter of rich people and my father is just a nobody." Yvonne said. I raised a brow. There was definitely more. Fiona Torres was more than a fashion designer, and Adam Torres was more than a good hearted man with a comic fetish with Dad. "Hmm." I hummed. Yvonne that proceeded to pick strands of grass from the ground throwing it behind her shoulder. "My Dad had another fit." I murmured. Yvonne's head shot up. "Really?" Yvonne asked. I nodded. "How bad? Scale of 1-10." Yvonne asked in her best therapeutic voice. "Possibly an eight? Dad completely blew Mom off this morning, he's wearing the same bandage around his arm. I knew there would another fit. His wound never really heals." I admitted. "You know that I tried to find out by my parents right?" Yvonne stated. I nodded. "Yeah and they wouldn't budge. Neither would Alli or Dave." I added. Yvonne rolled her eyes. "That's because Zach is the worst person to ask to get information." Yvonne said. I chuckled. "We'll find out, Jules. Or you will by your parents. They can't take this to the grave." Yvonne said in a reassuring tone. I rolled my eyes. "Sure they can't take this secret to the grave." I said sarcastically. "Who can't a secret to the grave." A voice asked. I looked up to see Teddy had approached us. Yvonne had this huge goofy grin plastered on her face as Teddy took a seat next to her. Fairly close I may say. "What are you two talking about?" Teddy quipped as he leaned back on his hands, taking in the sun on his tanned skin. "Julia's parents." Yvonne gushed. I shot her a look of disbelief as she gushed to Teddy. Yvonne shrugged her shoulders and smiled as Teddy look intently at me. "Weren't your parents the ones I met last night. The woman with the reddish brown hair and floral print dress and the man wearing a band t shirt with piercing green eyes?" Teddy asked. I nodded. "Clare and Eli." I said. Teddy hummed. "Their names sound familiar. As if my parents talked about them." Teddy said softly. My ears perked up like a dogs. "Who are your parents?" I asked, I was suddenly interested in Teddy could help me out. "KC and Jess Guthrie." Teddy said as he pulled a string hanging on his shirt. "Oh." I said. Silence was filled. "Do you have any siblings Teddy?" Yvonne quipped. I sighed a breath of relief as she filled the awkward void. Teddy nodded. "A little sister, Lilith. She's starting her freshman year here." Teddy said. "My sister's starting her freshman year here too. Willow." I added. Teddy smiled. "I'll be sure to tell Lilith to look out for Willow.." Teddy trailed off trying to remember my last name. "Goldsworthy. Willow Goldsworthy." I said, filling the void. "Alright. Thanks." Teddy said. I sure as hell didn't miss Yvonne's seething glance at me as I smiled at Teddy. I was sure to hear her later. "What's your year Teddy?" Yvonne asked in a more flirtatious voice. "Senior. What about you guys?" Teddy asked directly at me. Yvonne's smile fell. "Juniors." I said quickly. Teddy nodded his head and smiled slightly. This made Yvonne furrow her brows in disgust. From the blue Yvonne somehow caught Teddy's attention and they started talking about Toronto. I rolled my eyes and put my headphones back on, blasting the volume full speed. I leaned my head against the trunk of the oak tree, coming up with ways to break my parents of their history.**

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**Ooh! Julia has something up her sleeve! I wanted to show how Yvonne feels towards Julia and Teddy's relationship, even though Julia doesn't like him and Yvonne is just head over heels for him. Teddy happens to show Julia more affection. && if your wondering where I got Jess from she's a new character for the real Degrassi show. I just saw a picture where it seems she's flirting with KC and he's shying away in WTF moment. If any are catching on, Yvonne or Victoire know of Fiona's abuse/drinking problem or Adam's transgender identity issue. && I shall post in Teddy's POV or Eli's next XD && don't forget too..**

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	4. Pathetic

**WARNING: drinking till night hours, drunk fathers, theodores!, running off to Julia, beating down and abuse, FOUL language, && lots of rambling!**

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**Chapter Four: Pathetic (Teddy's POV)**

**Home. Did I have a home? Did a drunken father who did nothing, but beat me and Mom to a pulp count as a part of home? No. Of course not. Everyday I yearn to be let out, like a dog in a cage. I wanted out. Mom took his punches to protect me, but when it came down to where Mom was knocked out on the floor and Lilith was hiding behind me. I was his new punching bag. As soon as I entered the house I was hit with the foul smell of alcohol. I gagged and slammed the door shut. Mom walked from the kitchen, more like running. "Go to your room. Grab Lilith and run to your room." Mom ordered. "Mom why-" Suddenly Dad emerged from the living room. His brown hair was a mess, his brown eyes, my brown eyes were living anger. A bottle of vodka in his hand. His mouth twisting into a grimace. "Come back here Jess. I wasn't finished." Dad growled. Mom frantically looked at me. "Run Theodore! Run!" Mom yelled. Usually I would yell back at my full name being used, this time was an exception. I bounded up the stairs. I scattered around the hall, where to go? Using my instincts I ran into Lilith's room and slammed the door behind me, locking it. Lilith looked up, her long brown hair covering her face, she looked at me full faced with big brown eyes that were full of worry. "Teddy?" Lilith whispered. I nodded and touched my nose. Our signal. I touch my nose as to tell her that Dad's at it again. Lilith immediately locked the windows at this situation as I guarded the door, I heard Mom's screams as they pierced my ears. "KC! Please! Stop!" Mom pleaded. I heard thumps and slamming. "Shut the fuck up whore. I know about your little affair. I'm punishing you." Dad snarled. "It was six years ago!" Mom yelped. More slams. "Like I give a flying fuck. This is what you deserve!" Dad screamed. I heard glass breaking, Lilith immediately launched herself on me, her arms around my waist as she buried her head in my stomach. I covered her ears, not wanting her to hear the vulgar profanity her thirteen year old mind doesn't need to hear. "Teddy.. I'm scared." Lilith whimpered. I sighed and pressed my lips to her cheek. "Just stay quiet Lilly. Please. Then Dad will stop. He'll stop.." I hoped. Lilith just nodded her head, her eyes though were concerned and didn't buy my lie. The screams seemed to stop, I uncovered Lilith's ears. We listened intently. We heard loud stomps up the stairs. Dad. "Leave Lilly." I whispered in her ear. Lilith looked up at me with big brown eyes. "Where?" Lilith asked. Her voice was so small. We're new to town, we know no one here.. Really. Then I thought suddenly, Julia's house. "Go to 368 De Grassi Street. The third house on the right, it sticks out because a hearse in parked out front and there's a garden gnome on the porch. Don't stop running until you get there Lilly." I demanded. "Who lives there?" Lilith asked, her brown eyes wide. "A friend. Her name is Julia. Ask for Julia." I said. Lilith nodded and headed for the window when the door began to get slammed on. "TEDDY! OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!" Dad shouted. I saw as the door handle began to shake. "Run." I hissed. Lilith nodded and jumped from the window, I could hear her thump softly as she landed and scampering feet as she ran until I could no longer hear my sister. "OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Dad screeched. I didn't say a word as I backed away from the door, I could hear the slams and he was using an object to break the door down. I sighed. The beating would only get worse if he breaks the door down. I hesitated toward the door, I quickly turned the knob and swung the door open. Dad stopped beating the door and smirked. "You have your mother's brains." Dad murmured. "Too bad she won't be here to see." He added. I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out as the bat struck my head knocking me to the floor speechless. I felt his breath on my skin as he cowered over me. "That was for coming home late." Dad hissed. Another swift beating to my lower back, I shouted in pain as the pain slithered up my spine. "That was for fucking your mother and she got knocked up with you, but this one is for.." Dad then brought the bat up and struck my stomach, I doubled over in pain on the floor. "That one was for sneaking off with _Elijah Goldsworthy's _daughter." Dad sneered especially on Eli's name. He spat in my direction before dropping the bat and walking from the room with his rum in his hand. I felt the tears run down my face. Mom was downstairs unconscious and Lilith's roaming the streets alone looking for Julia's house. _Sneaking off with Elijah Goldsworthy's daughter. _How did he know the Goldsworthy's? They seemed like good hearted people, a friendly mother, but not too friendly father. Eli had looked at me with a glaring look and awareness over his wife and daughter. A lion protecting his lioness and cub. I managed to get on my feet with the bed frame as support. I winced at the immediate pain my abdomen. I glanced at the mirror, I didn't want to see the huge purplish bruise that I would sporting off. I staggered to the mirror and stood there. I took in my look. I was a carbon copy of my father. The menace. The beast that beats me. Mom had always said that he'd need to break her to get to me, Now he has to beat me to get to Lilith, he's never laid a hand on her body, never will. My chest started to close up on me and I doubled over in pain, collapsing on the floor. I took ragged breaths and took a glance up under my bangs seeing a defenseless man.. A pathetic man.. I was my father.**

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**Oh damn! I did want to include what Teddy was going through at home, How life with KC really is. The scene reminds me of when Craig (season 2?) I believe it was season 2 and his Dad use to abuse him badly. The scene with the mirror was based off of Craig's when he noticed the huge purplish black bruise and Angela found it when they were playing. && Yes Teddy's full name is Theodore, I think that's cute. A name picked by Jess. KC picked Lilith's name, Lilith is a name I used from my Sims 2 game and the pre made family The Pleasants have twin daughter (teenagers) Angela and Lilith. One a angel and the other the darker one. Lilith's name is deprived from "darkness and satanic." would she live up to the name? The next chapter will be in Eli's POV for sure. I like to switch off from the teenagers to the adults. The POV's will be in Julia, Clare, Teddy, & Eli. I don't see me getting insight from Yvonne or Willow. Possibly from Lilith since she's an intriguing character. Look I'm rambling again! Anyways this chapter was short! So sorry! Next one WILL be long! && look out on my Fanfiction page for pictures of how Julia, Bentley, Lilith, Yvonne, Caroline, Lizzy and Joseph. The reason I won't be showing what Willow, Teddy, Victoire, Zachary, Ian, Jeanette, Lyla, Dominic and Bethany is because Willow looks like Clare (Season 9 Clare), Teddy looks like KC (Season 10), Victoire looks like Fiona just without the pointy nose, she has Adam's nose (Season 10), Zachary looks like Dave (Season 9 & 10, he looks the same!), Ian looks like Alli, her skin tone and all, Jeanette is a Holly J clone, Lyla looks like Sav, Dominic looks like Anya, and Bethany looks like Jenna, I'll upload one of her as a baby to the Pretenders. I'll find time! I will need too though! && One of Julia (Eli's ex girlfriend) Want to know a little secret? Julia (Eli's daughter) doesn't know where she got her name from :O. Don't forget too..REVIEW?**


	5. Mutual Feelings

**WARNING: eli's pov! Kinky eclare! Eli whining XP! KC clones number 2! && krack cocaine!**

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**Chapter Five: Mutual Feelings (Eli's POV)**

**"This is my favorite part.." I murmured into her snow white skin. Clare giggled and nuzzled her face into my neck. "You're my favorite. Way better than this lame actor." Clare soothed. I smirked as she playfully bit my neck. "The vampire has arisen." I whispered. Clare threw her head back and growled. "Nice impersonation of a vampire." I said sarcastically. Clare rolled her eyes. "I'd shut that beautiful mouth of yours before I start being very… naughty." Clare said seductively. I smiled and leaned back into the couch. "It isn't Friday night.. It's a Tuesday." I said. Clare smirked, almost identical to mine. "Well.. It's my Friday." Those words had me on my back in an instant, the movie forgotten as Clare straddled my hips. Her legs around my hips as her mouth moved with mine. I slipped my hand up her tank top and grabbed at the bra hooks, un doing each one until the bra straps fell. Clare moaned as she started to shrug the bra off. I smirked as I glided my hands up her waist and carefully to her breasts. "So impatient." Clare crooned as she struggled to rid the bra. "Let me help." I whispered and stuffed my head under her tank top. Clare started giggling immediately. "Ah! Eli! That tickles!" Clare giggled. I started kissing her lower stomach, but suddenly stopped as I felt a line under my lips. I drew back slowly seeing the scar risen and white. I gulped and was out of the mood. "Eli?" Clare said playfully. I pulled my head underneath her shirt and rose from the couch. Clare furrowed her brows. "Eli? Are you okay?" Clare asked concerned. I shook my head. "Going to bed." I muttered. "It's 7:30." Clare said. "We never go asleep this early." Clare added. I shook my head. "More sleep. Maybe I'll take extra hours at the newspaper." I murmured. Clare rolled her eyes. "Eli. I know you love writing, but you can't stand being away from us for too long. Plus you can't have after hours." Clare reminded me. I growled and whipped around. "This is all me isn't it?" I growled. Clare's oceans widened. "You? Eli, baby what are you talking about?" Clare questioned as she took a step forward. "This!" I shouted motioning toward my body. "I'm this monster who can't have after hours at work because I'm a mentally unstable man! A mentally unstable man who forgets his medication and has episodes that scare the living shit out of me. A mentally unstable man who almost killed his daughter." I whispered the last part, trying to rip the image from mind. Killing Julia? Wouldn't be the first time. "Oh Eli.." Clare crooned. Her arms around my torso as she pulled me closer and pushed my head down on her shoulder. I did flinch, but didn't rise from the touch. "Elijah you may be mentally unstable, but you are an amazing man. Don't think that for one second this is all a fraud." Clare said through threatening tears. "A fraud? Did you marry me for the right reasons?" I asked in a small voice. Clare's hands found my face and she cupped my face. "Of course. I married you because I'm so in love with you that I scares me." Clare whimpered. Her hands falling from my face. "I could easily lose you Eli. So many times you've tried." Clare sobbed. "How could you? We have three beautiful children!" Clare shouted, This time I took the hesitant step forward to wrap her in my tight embrace. Clare tried to fight with her small fists, but it didn't work. I was stronger. Clare continued to fight until she eventually gave into the sobs. "I hate you." Clare sobbed. Tears were threatening to fall from my eyes. "Is it possible that as much as I hate you for trying to commit suicide, I actually love you?" Clare wondered. I nodded. "Don't ever try anything that stupid ever again. I will never forgive you." Clare threatened. I nodded. "Never." I whispered. Clare looked up with sobbing oceans, her mouth on mine in a frenzy too powerful to comprehend. "Don't.. Leave.." Clare moaned through kisses. "Never ever.." I moaned. I allowed a man's sexual instincts take over as Clare pushed me against the wall and slid her hand down my pajama pants, holding onto a piece of me that made me go rigid.. Everywhere. "Wanna take this upstairs?" Clare murmured seductively. I was about to answer when quick raps were heard at the front door. Clare broke away from our embrace and cocked her head. "Who'd come this late?" Clare wondered. Clare was approaching the door to answer it, I pulled her back behind me. "Let me. You don't know who it could be." I murmured in her ear. Clare hesitated and nodded, staying closely behind me as the knocking got louder and louder. I quickly swung the door open to find a girl about thirteen or fourteen on our doorstep. She looked up at us with big brown eyes that screamed for help. Clare was first to speak. "Are you lost?" Clare asked in that motherly voice she gained during her pregnancy with Julia. The girl shook her head. "I'm looking for Julia." The girl said softly. I furrowed my brows at the small girl. "Why?" I questioned. "My brother Teddy told me to come here and find Julia." The girl admitted, she swayed back and forth on her heels. The resemblance suddenly hit me as I looked her fully on the face. She did resemble Teddy greatly. So this was KC's daughter? His genes were strong as mine. "Come inside sweetheart. I'll call Julia down." Clare said, she motioned for the girl to come inside. "Julia! Someone's here for you!" Clare shouted at the rising stairs. I stayed where I was as Clare and the girl waited patiently. "What's your name?" Clare asked, looking down at KC's clone number 2. "Lilith Helena Guthrie." KC's clone number 2 said softly. "Pretty name." Clare said unsurely. I cocked an eyebrow at Clare, she shrugged. "What's up?" Julia asked as she bounded down the wooden stairs, each creek as she ran. Julia stopped in front of KC's clone- Lilith. "Who's this?" Julia asked unsure. "This is Lilith. Teddy's little sister. She said she was here for you." I said, finally able to find my voice. "Oh." Julia said surprised, noticing the resemblance as I had. "Can we talk outside?" Julia asked, motioning at the door. Lilith nodded and the two walked out, Julia giving us a reassuring glance before closing the door. "Why were you freaked by her name?" I questioned, I found myself before Clare, fairly close. "Her name is deprived as darkness and satanic." Clare murmured. I sighed and wrapped my arms around Clare's waist. "Her father is KC. What do you expect? KC probably stands for Krack Cocaine noting his mother's junkie preferences. Wouldn't be surprised if he wounded up being atheists." I joked. Clare looked up with scared oceans. I gently rubbed her back. "I was joking sweetheart. I didn't mean to upset you." I murmured into her hair. Clare merely nodded as her head laid on my shoulder. "I feel as if our lives are back to drama." Clare admitted. I sighed heavily and closed my eyes. "I feel the same thing love."**

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**AH! I know this one sucks! I'm so sorry, I know this was Eli's comeback and I made it suck! But the next one will be good, It'll be Julia's POV. Lmao at KC standing for Krack Cocaine. Probably does.. Lmao! && I've been pondering on how many chapters this will be, I have topics to look over, one being Teddy's home abuse and KC's drinking problem. I have more to use and I plan on making this OVER 20 chapters. I was also wanting to try this question thing. I'll write a question and see your response, seeing how my writing affects you.**

**1: Is my writing sex scenes or sexual actions any way of upsetting? I am writing off of High School health knowledge, I do know how hormones work and I imagine Eclare being kinky at times. Is it upsetting?**

**2: What do you think will happen during Lilith and Julia's conversation? Will Lilith blurt out about their home problem or will she ask to stay over? What do you think?**

**3: How many chapters of this sequel do you think should happen? Would you like a soundtrack at the end like The Pretenders?**

**Thanks! && Don't forget too..**

**REVIEW?**


	6. Bruised

**WARNING: good flowing writing that doesn't suck! Creepy Lilith's, lies, booze, bruises on Teddy, glaring KC's and unconscious Julia's!**

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**Chapter Six: Bruised (Julia's POV)**

**"What do you mean by _Falling down the stairs_?" I asked rather loudly. Lilith immediately hushed me. "Quiet down Julia. Look. Teddy fell down the stairs and he needs some assistance." Lilith drabbled a bit on the word _assistance. _"Why me? Can't your mom or dad help?" I quipped, my arms folded across my chest in a somewhat demanding way. Lilith bit her bottom lip and swayed on her heels, which she seemed to do a lot. It seems as if she's thinking of a answer to come up with, suddenly her head shot up. "Mom's been tired, she's been working extra shifts at the café and Dad's hanging out with some buddies. Teddy told me specifically to come get you." Lilith said, her lips curling into a smile that didn't seem that friendly. I gulped at the frightening smile, I've seen that smile, only a tad different since I was five and Dad was having a fit. His lips curled into that psychotic grin as he tried to claw at my arm.. I shook my head dazed to see Lilith's expression has changed to an impatient glare. "Let me get my hearse keys." I muttered, Lilith smiled that creepy smile as I ducked back into the house. I felt guilty walking in on my parents having a "moment" as you would call it. Dad's arms were enclosed around Mom's torso, holding her close as he murmured sweet subtle things in her ears. Mom's eyes were closed as she leaned into Dad's shoulder, listening intently as he.. Sang? I knew Dad could sing, I've heard him hum or sing a few chords of Deadhand, but never had I heard him sing a full blown song. Especially to Mom. Here. In the entry way. It was sweet.. His voice and the moment. I hated wrecking it. "I'm going to Teddy's house." I said. Dad's singing stopped and Mom's eyes opened. They broke the embrace and stared at me. Dad taking steps toward me as Mom lingered behind, close on his trail. "Are you okay Jules?" Dad asked, his voice carrying a tone of concern. I nodded. "Teddy's hurt. Lilith needs me to help her since his parents are out." I said, slightly tweaking the story. Mom nodded, buying the story. "Alright Jules. Be back before eleven. I don't want you driving the streets alone at night." Mom ordered. I merely nodded and locked eyes with Dad. His emeralds.. My emeralds. His eyes didn't buy the lie. His eyes held disappointment. I could never lie to him ever.. "Bye." I squeaked as I quickly left the house before Dad's glare burned a hole in my brain. I brushed past Lilith as I hurried towards Morty. Lilith's footsteps echoed in mine as we entered Morty and were pulling out from the house, I glanced and saw Dad standing on the porch with Mom, her voice trying to calm him as he stood rigid watching as we disappeared down the street. More like glaring. His specialty.**

**The first thing that hit me walking into Teddy's house was the smell. The strong smell of alcohol. I noted that besides the smell the house was among like other houses, I also saw the bottles of alcohol spread on the coffee table and a broken vase on the floor. "Lilith.. What happened?" I questioned. Teddy didn't just fall down the stairs. Something more serious happened. "Nothing. Let's just go up to his room." Lilith said quickly as she shoved me up the stairs, I swore I saw blood on the broken vase, correct me if I'm wrong. Lilith shoved me into a room which was decorated in posters, a bed pushed against the wall with messy bed sheets. I immediately noticed Teddy sitting on the bed, doubled over.. In pain. "Teddy?" I asked in a small voice as I approached him. Teddy looked up with wide brown eyes. "Lilly!" Teddy sneered. "I told you-" "You told me to bring her here, because you fell down the stairs." Lilith said in a strong voice for a thirteen year old. Teddy's eyes suddenly understood what Lilith said, he nodded weakly and Lilith quickly left the room. I crouched in front of his figure. "Where does it hurt?" I asked. Teddy looked up with a pained face. "No where. Lilith was lying. You can just leave Julia." Teddy sneered, or tried too. His voice cracking, making the rest sound like a wince. "As if. Yvonne would kill me if I left you like this." I lied. Was I lying? Somewhat, Yvonne would be pretty mad if Teddy was hurt and I knew about it, but a part of me wanted to help him. Part of me wanted him not hurt or bruised. "Yvonne? Why would Yvonne kill you over this?" Teddy said, gesturing toward his weak body. "Don't tell her I told you this.. But Yvonne has a crush on you." I admitted with a small smile. Teddy managed to rise the corners of his mouth. "Cute." Teddy said in a small voice. I glanced up. "I know. It's Yvonne, she's very open about her feelings for boys." I said with a giggle. "Not that.. I meant your smile." Teddy whispered. I glanced at him under my lashes to see him genuinely meaning it. I shook my head out of my reverie. "I think you hit your head pretty hard. Show me your wounds." I said rather quickly. Teddy's smile faltered, but he slowly raised his shirt to sport off a large purplish bruise. "Oh Teddy.." I crooned, without knowledge, my fingers grazed his stomach feeling the raised skin where it was swollen. "Be gentle." Teddy winced. I looked up and stopped grazing my fingers. "Sorry." I breathed. "I'll be back… I'm getting ice." I breathed once more. I had to get out. I quickly left the room and noticed Lilith was standing outside the room with a curious look on her crazed face. I brushed past her as I swept down the stairs and bounded for the kitchen. The strong smell of alcohol hitting my nose, making me dizzy instantly. I tried to ignore the smell by breathing from my mouth as I opened the freezer, finding empty beer bottles scattered inside. I scoffed as I pushed them aside looking for ice. Upon finding the ice, I heard a loud grunt behind me. I quickly spun and found myself face to face with a haggard looking man, he looked liked Teddy. An aged Teddy. "Uhmm.. Hello." I breathed. The man continued to glare at me, his breathing getting heavier. "What are you doing here?" The man growled. I pressed myself against the refrigerator by the context of his voice. "You're his daughter aren't you." The man breathed after studying me. "Who's daughter?" I questioned, raising a brow. The man chuckled. "Just like him. Your just fucking like him." The man growled. I parted my lips to let a soft gasp escape, something I couldn't do if I prayed. "I knew it the moment I laid my eyes on your filthy being. You're his daughter.. Her daughter. You look just like him, but you have your mother's pathetic personality." The man said lowly. "How do you know my parents?" I gasped. This was scaring me.. Who was this? Teddy's dad? "Let's just say me and your mother got along.. Very well." The man said while he breathed the smell of alcohol onto my face. I coughed from the reeking smell infatuating my brain. I felt his fingers grazing my chin, his face getting closer. "Don't fret… This is what Eli and Clare deserve." The man gasped. My heart beat faster as the man's face came closer. Although suddenly he was pulled away from me. I looked up to see that Teddy was struggling with the man. "Get the fuck off!" The man grunted as Teddy swiftly kneed him below, sending him on the ground. I stared wide eyed at the scene before me. "Run! Run now!" Teddy growled, almost identical to the man's. I was quick to find my feet and run from the scene, passing Lilith's staring figure. I almost tripped over a crack while running to Morty. I quickly unlocked the door and jumped inside and locked the doors. I immediately drove off, the speed hitting 65, Morty never goes this fast.. Except for this time. I felt the tears eventually pour down my face as I was pulled farther from Teddy's home. I eventually found myself parked in front of home, the lights on. Of course they'd stay up. When I eventually turned the car off and got out of Morty, I leaned against his black interior as I walked up to my house. I opened the door and found myself slouching as I walked. "Julia?" Dad's concerned voice asked. I looked up to find him eyeing me carefully. "Julia?" Dad asked again, his hands on my shoulders. Although I couldn't respond as I lost consciousness in his arms.**

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**Wow.. I loved writing this chapter. I felt a nice flow writing this one :D. So more insight into Teddy's life and how Lilith is. Mood change much? && I had to include Eli singing since I've heard Munro sing and I personally thought it was amazing since it was live and not edited like the stuff we listen to now. Not much to say except EIGHT MORE DAYS UNTIL DEGRASSI! Oh I'm so freaking excited! October seems to be the month for everything, Degrassi, my BIRTHDAY and probs much more! I almost forgot.. QUESTIONS!**

**1: How do you feel with the abusement Teddy is receiving? Is it somewhat hard to read? Is it easily flowing in your mind?**

**2: Lilith's smile and her presence.. What do you think could possibly be wrong with her (It's not schizophrenia)**

**3: Do you expect Julia to ask Eli and Clare about the incident with Teddy and KC? Or do you expect her to keep it bottled up?**

**Thanks! && Next chapter will be in Clare's POV and don't forget too..**

**REVIEW?**


	7. Strained

**WARNING: unconscious Julia's, whiney Clare's, bathtubs, warm kisses && couch appearances.**

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**Chapter Seven: Strained (Clare's POV)**

**"Julia!" Eli gasped as he clung onto Julia's unconscious body. Julia body's limp in her fathers as Eli struggled to keep her up. "Help me to the couch." Eli breathed as he managed to carry Julia in his arms. I quickly tried to prop some pillows on the couch, but my mind was racing. What had just happened? Why was my daughter.. My sixteen year old daughter looking like someone had just been killed? Her face was white and pale as she entered the house, sending me and Eli wondering, her collapsing sent him into scare mode. Eli grunted as he carried Julia to the couch and gently placed her on the exterior. Eli fretted as he propped her head up with pillows and tucked her feet in, they were hanging off the couch. "Clare.. What's wrong with her?" Eli gasped as he tried to examine our unconscious daughter's body. "It seems like she fainted.. Or blacked out. Lucky that she fell in your arms than the ground. We would've taken her to the emergency room.. See if she had a concussion." I murmured while gently stroking her brown hair that felt sweaty underneath my fingertips. "I wonder what happened?" I murmured quietly, still stoking Julia's hair. Eli stood next to me, watching Julia intently. "I know.. It must be that damn Teddy." Eli growled. I sighed heavily and rolled my eyes. "I swear Eli.. You always blame Teddy for everything." I sneered. Why did Eli have to be difficult with everything? Why can't he accept that Teddy might be a good hearted person and be nothing like his father.. But this was Eli we were talking about. Stubborn as hell. "Or KC." Eli whispered as his fingertips lingered on Julia's snow white cheek. My head shot up. "KC?" I whispered, my voice drifting off. "Why else was I extremely pissed when Julia left with Lilith? I didn't want Julia there.. With KC." Eli explained through a pained voice. My head began to spin.. "Oh God.." I muttered, my hand on the arm of the couch for support. "What if KC hurt her?" I gasped through a choked throat. Eli's hand went rigid next to mine. "Then KC will be back in that prison before he knows it." Eli promised, his face tight and rigid. A promise meant keeping. "Does she look injured?" I asked, my voice gaining its volume. Eli gave her once over, careful not to touch her. "No.. Nothing visible. She just looks frightened and pale." Eli breathed. There was a bout of silence in the living room, the only sound was my breathing and Eli's small gasps. "Mmm." Julia groaned. Eli and I both jumped, looking at our daughter with concern. "Jules?" Eli crooned, his fatherly voice kicking in. Julia mumbled something incoherent before turning her head and breathing, "Teddy.." Julia breathed. The room was full of silence. Eli and I turned our heads in a strange synchronization as we stared into each other. The emerald burning into the ocean and the ocean putting it out. Julia's eyes fluttered to a small gasp. Her emerald eyes searching the room, the first thing she saw was Eli. "Daddy.." Julia gasped. "It's okay sweetheart." Eli murmured as Julia tugged on his arm, and pulled him down towards her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and sobbed into the crook of his neck, soaking his neck with tears. I stood by, feeling each crack in my heart by my strained relationship with Julia inching farther. She grabbed _Eli. _Of all people.. She always goes to him. They bond well, but she's chosen her father over her mother. "I-It was… d-dark.." Julia gasped between breaths. "Shh.. It's all over.." Eli crooned as his hands started to stroke her hair and rub her back. "B-But.. T-T-T.." Julia stuttered, she meant to say Teddy's name, she just couldn't grasp it. "Teddy." Eli said for her. Julia took an intake of air. "H-He's.. H-H-Hurt.." Julia sobbed. I crossed my arms and spun on my heel. No need for me to be here. Ruining the hundredth father-daughter moment.**

**"Clare? Clare open the door." Eli called out. I didn't glance up at the bathroom door. I sat in the bathtub with my legs hanging over and a book in my lap. I was reading happily for a couple hours until this idiot comes knocking. "I'll unlock the door with the magic password." Eli said with most likely a smirk. I rolled my eyes and turned the page. "Oceans for the win?" Eli questioned through the door. I glanced up to see the door handle being jiggled. I smirked. Nice try doctor doom. "Alright Clare. I'm unlocking this damn door." Eli ordered. I rolled my eyes and turned another page and continued my reading. I pretended to not listen as the door handle eventually was turned and footsteps entered the bathroom. I pretended not to see Eli out of my peripheral vision. I pretended I didn't see him sit next to me in the bathtub. "Julia's alright. Just a bit shaken." Eli reassured me. I didn't respond. "She's just so upset over seeing Teddy hurt. Nothing to do with KC, I guess I was wrong." Eli said glumly. As if he was wishing that KC had laid a hand on our daughter. A reason for KC to return to jail. "Why'd you leave the room?" Eli questioned. No response. I turned a page and kept my eyes on the small print of the book. Eli sighed heavily and most likely rubbed the bridge of his nose to help non-existent headaches or migraines he so often makes up to cover up a small episode threatening to emerge. "Clare.." Eli sighed. His voice sounded pained. A pain that struck a chord in my heart and made it sting. "Don't do this to me." Eli sighed again. I gulped to hold back the tears threatening to fall. "I'm not going through another one of our moments, Eli. It hurts enough just being with you." I whispered, closing my book and letting it fall from my fingers and fall between us. Eli glanced at the book for a millisecond before glancing at me. "Is this about Julia?" Eli asked, his voice raising. I shook my head and bit my lip. I was lying.. Hopefully he'll see through my façade. I rose from the tub and stepped out, feeling the touch of the cold bathroom tiles. "I'm sleeping on the couch." I murmured before walking from the bathroom and closing the door to a face with no response.**

**I could tell almost immediately that I was being carried. I awoke from the movement of being jolted. I didn't open my eyes, I knew the arms holding me. The firmness, yet gentle arms swayed me slightly as I felt myself being carried up the stairs. Out of habit, I snuggled into the warm chest and heard his heartbeat. _Thump. Thump. Thump. _I hid a smile and continued to snuggle. I wanted to scream when I was being put to bed. The cold sheets being pulled over me, my head fixed on the pillow. Every being in my body wanted to pull his face towards mine and have a passionate kiss, but my head kept me steady to my fake-sleeping face. I felt a warm kiss on my lips, the kiss seemed blissful. Just like any other "goodnight" kiss we share every night. I expected him to climb in next to me and wrap his arms around my torso. Hold me close and whisper that he loves me. My expectations were wrong when I heard the door close. I opened my eyes and rose from bed. I glanced around and saw that I was right. Eli had left me alone in here. For the first time in our twenty years of marriage, Eli has never _never _did this. Even if either of us were sick, we'd still stay with the other. It's love. I felt the tears sting on my lips and I raised my hand to my lips to feel the warm touch. The tears slid down my face and burned my lip, where the bite had broke skin. The burning sensation sent more tears down. Not only was my relationship with my daughter strained, but so was my marriage to my husband..**

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**Wowowowowowo. Intense shit there. I'm starting to get this vibe that Clare is a whiney bitch :P. I don't want her that way, but she's been acting so bitchy that I want to throw her out a window :P. Anyways, Julia said nothing to Eli! Guess Clare was wrong when she said they shared everything. In other news I'll be updating a lot, it's the weekend! Lmao XD The next POV is Teddy's. It'll be weeks after this confrontation between Eli/Clare. Seven more days until Degrassi peeps :DDDDD. I'm so freaking happy :D. Don't forget to..**

**REVIEW?**


	8. Reckless

**WARNING: stupid Teddy's, sexual stuffings, clingy Yvonnes, pissy Julias, GEOMETRY! Yahh,, very exciting -.- && HUGE SPOLIERS!**

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**Chapter Eight: Reckless (Teddy's POV)**

**How did I get here? How did I come to this point in my life? Had it became this fucked up that I was here.. In this girl's bed.. Her naked body next to mine. I took a shaky breath and closed my eyes. _Why did I do this? _I felt no pity for this girl.. This girl who meant little to me. Very little. Yvonne Torres. I sat up in the bed and rubbed my eyes, I turned the lamp on, Yvonne's eyes squinted at the light and she moaned. "Turn it off." Yvonne murmured. "I'm leaving." I whispered, sure to not wake up her parents. Yvonne's eyes opened in surprise. "You're not staying?" Yvonne asked with wide grey eyes. Like her mother. I shook my head. "I'm going home." I muttered. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and felt her arms latch onto my body. Her fingertips on my chest, her voice low in my ear. "Don't leave me Teddy." Yvonne moaned low in my ear. I rejected every urge to plant her on the bed and enter her with every force. "No Yvonne." I said firmly. Yvonne scoffed and pushed me away, she sat with her arms across her bare breasts. "So I was just your one night stand?" Yvonne sneered. I sighed and turned around. I didn't want to hurt Yvonne's feelings. "No.. You were way more than that." I lied coolly. Yvonne smiled, she bought the lie. "So does this mean our relationship is based off of more than sex?" Yvonne whispered. I nodded and pressed my lips to hers. Nothing. There was no pleasure through the kiss, no nothing. Just like the sex. A crappy way to lose my virginity. When the kiss broke, Yvonne smiled. "So I'll see you tomorrow at school?" Yvonne questioned. I nodded. "Hopefully we'll have some classes with each other." I said. No lying there. I wouldn't mind any classes with Yvonne, but I wanted at least one class with Julia. That's if she'd be any advanced classes like Yvonne will be. I quickly gathered my clothes and dressed in the chilled light. I pulled the beanie over my head and stared at my reflection. Still pathetic as ever. I've managed to get closer to Yvonne, in an attempt to get closer to Julia. _Julia. _She hasn't spoken to me since the moment when she came to my house.. To help me. Than my drunken father tried to pull a move on her. Something to do with her parents. History. There was definite history between my father and her parents. A history worth sitting down and finding out. Finding out why my father had a hatred for her parents so pure that he'd kill them. I've heard him, mutter nonsense to Mom. When she says he shouldn't. A blow to her jaw. It'll never stop. I'm just waiting for my eighteenth birthday. A birthday when I can take Lilith and Mom. We'll run. Far from here. "I'll see you tomorrow handsome." Yvonne murmured from her bed. I slightly smiled. "You too gorgeous." I murmured. I opened her balcony door and took in a breath of fresh air. I glanced back at Yvonne who was resting peacefully against her pillows. I huffed and jumped the balcony in quick swift moment.**

**"Have a nice first day, Teddy." Mom crooned. I looked at her. She had her huge round sunglasses on. Of course to hide the huge black eye she received from Dad last night after she swore at him. "I'll try." I muttered. I managed to escape the car with only a kiss on the cheek from Mom's fat dried lip. I stared at the big bold letters _Degrassi Community School. _I sighed heavily and glanced back, thinking of running back to Mom's car and hiding out until graduation next June, but saw that she had left and was speeding away. I shook my head and proceeded to my ultimate doom.. High school. The name of the school was funny. Had a funny taste in your mouth when saying it. Although my thoughts of doom were interrupted by someone linking arms with me. I turned my head to see Yvonne had linked her arm through mine, she had a tight grin across her face. Her grey eyes shining. "Hello handsome. I missed you last night." Yvonne said in a sweet voice. I maintained a smile and nodded. "I did too Y." I said using her nickname that Julia invented. Yvonne told me the story of when they were little and would play at each other's houses because their dad's wanted to talk and hang out, Julia never grasped Yvonne's name and just called her Y, now ten years later, Julia's still using it and many others besides Yvonne's twin, Victoire, who demands to be called Victoire, not Vic or Vicky like Julia came up with. Yeah.. I can't stand that bitch. Yvonne guided me through the halls and swerved me back and forth, pointing out my classes and finding her own. Yvonne jumped with glee upon finding out she had Geometry with me. Yvonne reached up on her toes and kissed me firmly on the mouth. I grasped her waist and cuddled her being with mine. Nothing special of the kiss. Yvonne broke away from the kiss and giggled. "You're an amazing kisser." Yvonne squealed as she touched my cheek. I halfheartedly smiled. "Thanks Y." I said. Soon the bell rung loudly and many people said byes and I'll see you at lunch before parting ways. Yvonne grabbed my hand and basically yanked me into Geometry, our first period. We took seats in the middle and I tried to tune out Yvonne's constant yapping in my ear. "Jules! Over here! I've saved you a seat!" Yvonne quipped. I gulped and turned around to see Julia standing awkwardly by the doorway, her Geometry book in her hand. Julia sighed and took the seat behind Yvonne's. I took the moment of Yvonne talking to Julia to really notice her. Julia's hair was straight and just fell forward in her face, her lip ring was in place and she was sporting off a new nose ring, I noticed her gages in her ear seemed a little wider, her emerald eyes smiling as she spoke with her best friend. I was starting to notice her little flaws when she spoke, when Yvonne said something out of the norm or completely random, her brows furrowed and she made a small face, or when Yvonne said something that's not funny, Julia would smile halfly at her attempt at being funny. "Oh Jules. I guess I forgot to tell you." Yvonne said sweetly, she reached over and grabbed my hand in hers. Julia's emeralds seemed confused, than pained. "Me and Teddy are official now. Isn't that great?" Yvonne asked with wide grey eyes. _Dammit Yvonne. _I thought as I looked at Julia's angry look burning in her emerald eyes.**

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**Yeah.. Not my best.. Sorry! The next one will be! It'll be in Eli's POV! I already have this whole sequel figured out, too! I don't know how many chapters though, I do know that this story will have (SPOILER ISSUES) Abusement, Pregnancy, Abortion, Miscarriage, Mental Hospitals, Kidnapping, Being Arrested, Getting Shot, Death, Killings, and Suicide. WOW! Yeah mostly the big things like Death and Killings will happen at the end XD, and the last line will be clever :D. FIVE MORE DAYS! I'm so happy! I'll be so giddy at school that day wanting to GET THE HELL OUT OF MY CLASSES! Science will not be fun :P. Its my last freaking period. Anyway, I'll try to post again, I'll be on Tumblr and playing Sims 2, Eek! I'm such a dorkwad! && There is a new promo for Degrassi! Much Music one and it has Clare talking to Drew? I thought it was Eli, but Drew's hair is short and he's in a red polo. And more with Jenna. Don't forget too..REVIEW?**


	9. Three Hundred Thousand

**WARNING: an eli episode, insanity takes over, needles of doom, Bentley/eli moment, three hundred thousand years, alli's birthday, one wish && sexual stuffings!**

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**Chapter Nine: Three Hundred Thousand (Eli's POV)**

**I wanted to desperately reach over and grab her. She was only a couple inches from me. She'd help me. I know she will. She's Clare Goldsworthy. She's my wife. My wife who's been avoiding me for the past two weeks since our little fight. I could feel my stomach twist and turn. I felt it come on. I just needed her to help me. I just needed her for support dammit. "Clare." I said through clenched teeth. Clare didn't seemed phased, she just grumbled and shifted away from me. I groaned and managed to escape the tangle of blankets and sheets. I heaved myself off the bed and kept my teeth clenched. Another episode coming on. My hand clamped down on the bed frame and my nails droved over it. I stumbled into the bathroom and shut the door quietly behind me. I managed to open the bathroom cabinet and looked for the needle. "Fuck." I cursed, I was out. The voices started to come back into my head. Small, but loud obnoxious voices. Still to this day it's hard to tune them out. "Clare." I said loudly, My voice gaining momentum. I heard nothing. "Clare!" I shouted. I felt my knees give out and I couldn't hold onto the sink for support no more. I felt the nails clamp onto my skin and claw the skin. I screamed loudly, a blood curdling scream. "Eli!" Clare yelped. I glanced up with glazed eyes and saw her figure there, in my old pajamas and a baggy t-shirt. Clare rushed over to me and grabbed onto my shoulders. "Stop! Eli, please." Clare said firmly. I snarled under my breath, causing Clare to flinch. My insane side started to pick on her. Insanity made my hand claw more skin out, making Clare cringe. There were no words from Clare as I heard her scram around looking for medication. "You can't save him." I snarled under my low breath. "Hell if I can't." Clare spat back at insanity. Insanity snickered and made my arm scream in pain. Blood pouring out badly onto the white floor. "He'll die one of these times." Insanity promised. Clare turned around with a needle in her hand and she jogged to insanity. "Sorry Eli.." Clare whispered before jabbing the needle into insanity's neck. Insanity started to drown out and I surfaced. Breathing for my own breath, I realized the pain in my neck and arm, it was mind blowing. I screamed loudly. "Shh.. Hush Eli.. I'm so sorry." Clare murmured sweetly. I felt her lower me onto the warm floor, the warm floor full of my blood. "Just dream.. Just dream." Clare whispered, I lastly saw her face as she placed a hand on my cheek.**

**I sure did dream that night, My dreams were full of Clare. It always will be. "Daddy." A small voice quipped. I groaned and turned over. "Daddy.. Mommy wants you." The small voice asked. I slowly opened my eyes to find myself in my bedroom, the lights off and the curtains closed. "Leave Daddy alone, Bents." I mumbled into the pillow. I felt a small hand touch my arm.. The arm I tore up last night. "Mommy said you had a fit." Bentley whispered, I flinched as he began to stroke the bandages. I lifted my head to see him with bed head and tired blue eyes. "Come here." I crooned, Bentley looked up and climbed onto my lap gently, making sure not to hurt my arm, He leaned his head into my chest and sighed heavily. "I heard you screaming." Bentley said. I closed my eyes and kissed the top of his head. "When are they gonna stop, Daddy? I'm scared when they happen." Bentley admitted in a small voice. I tried to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. "They won't leave, Bents. They never will. Daddy's just sick." I said in a choked whisper. "Well just go to the hospital. They make everything better." Bentley suggested with wide pale blue eyes. "They can't help Daddy." I chuckled. "I don't want you to die." Bentley gasped as he threw his arms around my neck and nuzzled his face into my neck. "Bentley Kristopher Goldsworthy. What is making you think I'll die?" I asked astonished. Bentley pulled away and wiped some tears with his small hand, I helped him out. "Mommy mumbled something about it on the phone with Auntie Lizzy." Bentley admitted. I swore under my breath lightly. Now Clare was calling my sister? I didn't need Lizzy worrying over me, she has a life that doesn't involve her insane older brother. "I assure you Bent. I won't die." I promised Bentley. Bentley took in a small gasp. "Never ever? You'll live until your two hundred thousand years old?" Bentley asked. I sighed and smiled. "I'll live to be three hundred thousand years old." I promised. Bentley giggled. "Bents? Mom asked me to get you. She wants to talk to Dad." Willow said from the doorway. Her posture was so alike to Clare's when she's impatient. Bentley nodded. "Forever and ever, Daddy?" Bentley asked. I smiled. "Of course Bents." I promised. As Willow and Bentley left the room, I heaved myself off the bed, feeling the pain my arm. I gently rubbed the bandage and only felt more pain. I walked down the hall, passing Willow and Bentley in Bentley's room and Julia's room, Julia had her glasses on and was writing intently on her laptop. I smirked and walked down the stairs, I glanced into the living room. Clare was staring at a picture that hung on the wall. I approached her and she tilted her head back, her blue eyes were tired and sad. "Clare?" I asked softly. "I'm telling the kids to get ready, everyone's coming today for Alli's birthday." Clare breathed. I swore. How did I forget Alli's 38th birthday? "Jenna, Daniel and Beth's flying down. They'll be here in a couple hours. That gives me some time to organize the house." Clare said, making a note to herself. "Need any help?" I asked as she walked from me. Clare shook her head. "I'm handling it." Clare sneered before walking off. I ran a hand through my hair and turned around to see that Clare was staring at our family picture from years ago. Bentley wasn't even born yet. Julia's was about eight and she was holding Willow's hand, Willow must have been five. Although I was cradling Clare in my arms, her arms cradling a nine month pregnant belly. Our matching emerald rings shining in the glare of the light. Back when our lives weren't messed up with returning exes and his son and awful insanity.**

**"Make a wish Alli." Jenna chirped happily from beside Alli. Alli pondered for a moment and finally blew her candles out in one gasp. "Damn Alli." Dave breathed. Alli giggled and playfully hit Dave. "Not in front of the children." Alli scolded. Dominic Bhandari chuckled from his father Sav's side. "Might I remind you Aunt Alli, I'm a college student." Alli rolled her eyes and Anya gasped. "You better not be cursing or partying, Nic. Your father and I didn't raise you that way." Dominic and Sav chortled in laughter with the others. "Please Anya.. You basically told Nic how to act.. I just swerved him in the right direction." I zoned from their conversation and looked over at Clare, she was fake smiling at Alli. She was obviously upset at our little conversation from this morning. "I'll be back." Clare whispered in Alli's ear. Alli quickly grabbed onto Clare's arm and said firmly. "I wished that my best friends will resolve their differences. You can't stay angry at Eli just because Julia prefers Eli over you." Clare's face fell and she pulled herself from Alli's grip and she rushed from the room. The whole room had heard the confrontation and we had fallen silent. "I'll get her." I mumbled while I dashed from our dining room. I stomped quickly up the stairs and found the door to our bedroom, opened by a creak. I pushed the door open slowly and saw Clare, her face buried in her hands as she sobbed choked sobs. I closed the door behind me and I approached Clare. "Don't you dare tell me to leave Clare." I said firmly, as Clare spun on a heel and I saw her mascara run down her pale cheeks. "Alli's right.." Clare choked. My brows furrowed. "This is because of Julia? Because me and Julia have a bond?" I questioned and took a foot forward to Clare. Clare nodded. "I'm so pathetic. Crying over this." Clare sobbed. "You aren't pathetic, Clare." I crooned to her sobbing figure. "I feel guilty when I don't spend enough time with Willow. I love all our children the same, So me and Julia have a strong bond, just like you and Willow." I explained. Clare glanced up from the floor and stared into my eyes. Before a second word, Clare threw her arms around my neck and pressed her lips fiercely to mine. "I'm.. So.. Sorry.." Clare gasped as she continued to kiss my shocked lips. "No need to apologize." I breathed once, Clare had broken the kiss and she stared to unbutton my black dress shirt. I stared at her oddly and she smiled. "It's Friday night."**

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**Awwe! I had to make this chapter cutesy! Eclare has Friday night sex and Bentley/Eli moment. I needed to add Bentley, he'll have another major moment, and Willow will have one as well. I can't believe that I've written nine chapters and have 37 reviews, over 2,000 words and many hits XD. Anyway to keep this short, don't forget too..**

**REVIEW?**


	10. Conflicting Personalities

**WARNING: math! (AHHH!) math partners, a guy named Liam Farris whose name I stole from Miley Cyrus' boyfriend's name Liam Hemsworth, talking about MORTY, studying :P, conflicting minds, almost kisses, coarse language (Julia :P) && A SURPRISE THAT MAKES YOU HAVE JENNA ANAL LEAKAGE!**

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**Chapter Ten: Conflicting Personalities: (Julia's POV)**

**Who has ever heard of having a math partner? I've heard of math groups, but math partners? Supposedly Ms. Webb said that having a partner to help you understand the subject is better than doing it alone. The catch to this whole, hey I have a partner to copy off of, is that she chooses the partners. Yvonne gave me a worried glance, she shot one at Teddy too. I sighed heavily and leaned my head onto a balled fist. I glared at Ms. Webb with dread. This bitch hasn't even been my teacher for a month, and I hate her. I droned Ms. Webb out of my mind and started to doodle on the paper in front of me. "Yvonne Torres and Liam Farris." Ms. Webb drawled, I looked back at Yvonne who's face was clearly upset by the partnership. I gave her a sympathetic look, as she slumped her way to Liam. "Julia Goldsworthy and Theodore Guthrie." Ms. Webb drawled, she glanced at us over her oval glasses. "Fuck." I cursed under my breath. Teddy seemed unphased by the massive chuckles by his full name "Theodore." Teddy turned his attention to Yvonne, who happened to look.. Very upset. Yvonne somewhat glared at me under her thick lashes, I gulped and turned around. "So.." Teddy muttered as he took an empty seat by me. "Save yourself the trouble Teddy. We'll split the work 50/50. No need to work together." I said firmly as I looked into his brown eyes. Brown eyes that seemed genuine and full of.. "Julia, you can't still be possibly mad over what happened at my house a couple months ago?" Teddy said lowly, close to me so that Yvonne, who had a ear towards us couldn't hair. "Drop it Teddy. Nothing to discuss." I sneered, sounding a lot like my father during his fits. "There's a lot to discuss. My father.. He has-" I quickly cut him off and glared at him. "A drinking problem? I noticed that." Teddy sighed heavily as I began the first problem. "He does. He's always been that way. I'm just sorry. Sorry that he almost attacked you." Teddy apologized for his father. I closed my eyes and rubbed the bridge of my nose. "Wouldn't be the first time that someone tried." I mumbled, remembering the incident with my father. "What was that?" Teddy asked with curious brown eyes. I shrugged. "Nothing. Just drop it." I muttered solidly as I continued on the problem. There was a bout of silence between us as we worked on the problems. I felt a pair of eyes glare into my head. "I think.. That you should come to my house." Teddy said rather quickly. I turned my head slowly to scowl at him. Teddy raised his hands in defense. "Damn.. Death scowl much Goldsworthy?" Teddy said defensively. I smirked without realizing it, until I saw my reflection through Jeanette Coyne's mirror. I quickly dropped the Goldsworthy smirk and regained composure. "Your so.." I trailed off trying to think of a word to describe his action. "Amazing? Handsome? Cute?" Teddy categorized with a smile. I rolled my eyes. "Someone's full of themselves." I muttered while trying to do a problem. "I was about to say a major asshole or completely fucking schizophrenic. But you continue to think highly of yourself." I said with a smirk. Teddy gaped at me as I completely got him back at his remark. The bell rung throughout the class and people shuffled to their desks to load their backpacks. I shoved my thick binder into my messenger bag and slung it over my shoulder. "Is it a yes?" Teddy called out as I approached Yvonne. I spun on a heel and smirked. "Meet me by Morty." Teddy looked at me oddly. "Morty? Who's that?" Teddy asked confused. I giggled. "Figure it out _Theodore._" I spun on my heel and headed out of the classroom, leaving a confused Teddy and a upset Yvonne.**

**I leaned against the exterior of Morty, my arms across my chest and a foot against the black exterior. I looked around and looked for that jerk. Pulling my phone out, I saw it was 3:38pm. I rolled my eyes and spun around to find myself face to face with a smiling Teddy. I took a step back. "You named your hearse Morty?" Teddy asked with wide eyes. I snickered. "I got it for my sixteenth birthday from my dad. It was his, way before it was mine. Blame my dad for naming it Morty." I accused. "Plus it's a cute name." I added, coming to Morty's defense. Teddy rolled his eyes, he was walking around Morty to get to the passenger side when I grabbed his arm and yanked him back. "Is your.. Father going to be home?" I questioned in a low voice. "No. He's out drinking with some friends. When he's back, I'll make sure that you're home safe and I'll be there." Teddy promised. I furrowed my brows. "What about.. You? You could get seriously hurt from a drunk." I accused. Teddy slumped his shoulders. "I'm just worrying about you." Teddy said with a smile. There was an awkward silence between us and I cleared my throat. Teddy swallowed and sighed. "For Yvonne's sake. She wouldn't forgive me if you were to get hurt." Teddy quickly corrected himself. Teddy spun on his heel and climbed into Morty's passenger side. I shook my head from its daze and climbed into the drivers side. Once the ignition was turned, the heavy metal music blew through the car. Teddy winced. "Damn Julia. Trying to kill me with lyrics?" Teddy scowled. I smirked the best a Goldsworthy's could.**

**"This is fucking ridiculous. I give up." I complained as I shut my geometry book shut and rolled onto my back on Teddy's bed and threw my arms over my face. Teddy chuckled. "Your just distributing wrong. It's your negatives and positives that your messing up on." Teddy corrected me, quickly changing the numbers on my paper. "I don't care!" I shouted, it came out muffled from my arms over my mouth. "I have no clue how I got into a advanced math class for seniors! The administrators must be on crack." I accused. Teddy chuckled again. "Yvonne's in our class." Teddy reminded me. "That's because Yvonne is filthy rich and can afford a tutor to help her out. She's set for life." I groaned, thinking how easy Yvonne and Victoire have it, while I actually have to work for anything. "Do you like Y?" I blurted out. Teddy sat there with his mouth gaped open. I swallowed. "Don't answer that. Sorry." I muttered rather fast. "I should go." I said quickly. I felt an arm on my forearm pull me down. "No. Don't leave." Teddy pleaded. I shook my head. "I should. This was a mistake." I admitted, gathering my belongings up. I spun on my heel and headed for the exit, when Teddy called out, "I like Yvonne." I stopped in my tracks and tried to press my books to my chest in an attempt to help them from breaking. Why would they break? "But I like some other girl way more." Teddy admitted. I turned around to see Teddy was behind me. His body towering over mine. "This girl is so beautiful.. She has the softest brown hair ever." Teddy said sweetly. "She has a cute smirk that makes me attempt that smirk." Teddy admitted with a smile. I tried my hardest not to smirk. "And she has the prettiest eyes I've ever seen." Teddy said with the most genuine eyes. I gulped as his lips moved toward mine. My mind suddenly split in two. _Kiss him! Just go for it Julia! What Yvonne doesn't know won't hurt her!_ My hormonal side said, shouting against the other side. _Don't do it Julia. You'll break Yvonne's heart. You know she likes Teddy a lot. Then there's his family problem. It's a lot to take in, Julia. Back off. _The voice growled in my mind. My hormones and conscience fighting against each other in seconds as Teddy's face inched forward. I stayed put, staring at his perfect pink lips as they etched towards my cracked ones. Why would he kiss me to began with? I'm no prize. Yvonne's way better than her reject friend from pre-school. "Well no one told me there was a party happening." A voice growled from the doorway. I spun around to find myself face-to-face with Teddy's father. His breath reeking of alcohol and cigarettes. Teddy had a firm grip around my waist, a gesture that would send me into a mixture of butterflies in the stomach and automatic punching. But in this situation.. I allowed it. I wanted it. Teddy was here.. To protect me, pulling me close to his chest and away from the man, who's fist was raised.. Not aimed at Teddy.. But aimed at me.**

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**O.O. Sorry for not updating in EVER! Like two days! This chapter was hard to get going, and well yeah :/. Anyway I'm just SYKED THREE MORE DAYS UNTIL DEGRASSI! I've just been so obsessed! I do believe the next chapter is in Clare's POV? Then Teddy's. So the drama surrounding Julia/Teddy/KC will be revealed in chap. 12, Clare/Eli have their own problems. I'd also like to mark this day as a new love triangle, Julia/Teddy/Yvonne. A triangle NEVER meant to happen :D. Tell me who you choose to be together, Julia/Teddy or Yvonne/Teddy? Or! Julia/Yvonne? JK! I'll be posting tomorrow and don't forget too..**

**REVIEW?**

**-I'll TRY to find time to upload the pictures of the cast. :P. I have the pictures I just need to upload them.**


	11. Four Times The Charm

**WARNINGS: throwing up, white toilet bowls, scared eli's, possible pregnancy, pregnancy tests, condoms XD, brown bags, mistakes, signs, and menopause talk! (WTF?)**

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**Chapter Eleven: Four Times The Charm (Clare's POV)**

**_Few Hours Prior To Chapter 10.._**

**Who would've thought the toilet would be my new best friend. My head sticking in, my contents being emptied into the white bowl. "Ugh." I groaned loudly, tasting the awful vomit in my mouth. Thinking of that taste sent my stomach into a frenzy and I pulled my head over the bowl to empty my contents and become best friends. Once I felt as if the vomiting was over, I heaved myself up and grabbed onto the edge of the sink and stared into my haggard and distraught look. I looked as if I was a cat who had been drowned and almost ran over by a dog lover. As if Eli would even glance at me before wondering what had happened, sending him into a protective stance. After brushing my vomit stained teeth, I stumbled into the bedroom, ready to fall onto the bed only to find Eli was sitting on the bed with his arms crossed across his chest. "Are you okay?" Eli asked suddenly as he jumped to my aide, I hadn't realized that I was trying to stand. "Never been better." I croaked. Eli rolled his eyes and laid my gently on my side on the bed, pulling sheets over my body. "No offense but you kind of look like shit." Eli said with a nervous laugh. I scoffed. "Thanks a lot _husband._" I scowled. Eli smirked and kissed my cheek with his soft pink lips. Although soon after his hand going to my forehead immediately, feeling my forehead and cheeks, "No temperature." Eli murmured oddly. "Maybe you ate something bad last night." Eli suggested. "And possibly the night before and the night before that. I've been puking my guts up for the past week, Eli. You know that." I said knowingly. Eli nodded before sitting on the edge next to me. There was a long bout of silence that filled the room besides Eli's ragged breathing. "No.. It can't be." Eli mumbled to himself. I looked up at his face, it was pinched up with confusion. "We used.. No.. We.." Eli again mumbled odd words, his face completely and utterly confused. "Tell me Eli." I asked, I slowly sat up and tried to not upset my stomach. "Your off the pill aren't you?" Eli asked slowly. I thought and pondered for a moment. Did I forget to take my pills? I couldn't have. The only time I ever did that was when me and Eli were trying.. Trying for Julia, Willow and Bentley. Well.. Julia was more of a surprise. "Not that I know of.. Why are you asking?" I questioned, leaning forward for the answer. Eli bit his bottom lip and glanced around nervously. There was more silence between us as Eli continued to look around the room, expecting something exuberant to happen. I sighed heavily and Eli quickly looked at me, his emerald eyes were thick with concern. Eli took a deep breath and exhaled. "I think you should take a pregnancy test." Eli breathed quickly. My oceans widened at his conclusion. "Pregnancy test?" I gasped with a nervous look. Eli nodded. "I haven't exactly been wearing the rubber and.. Well you don't remember if you took your pill. You've been throwing up in the mornings. It all leads to-" I quickly cut Eli off mid sentence with a scoff. "I can't be pregnant Eli. I'm 37. My body should know better than to get pregnant." I said exasperated. Eli chuckled lowly. "Don't be so dense Clare. You haven't hit menopause. You can't just tell your body not to get pregnant with my sperm." Eli chuckled. I crossed my arms across my chest. "This is unbelievable. We agreed on three children." I spat back at Eli. Eli rolled his eyes. "I know we did. But our bodies didn't three weeks ago." I quickly punched his shoulder and Eli yelped. "Damn Clare.. I'm just saying." Eli quickly covered for himself. "Then don't." I sneered. "I'm not pregnant. I just have a bad bout of food poisoning, that's all." I said through clenched teeth. Eli raised a brow. "Really?" Eli questioned. I nodded a firm nod. "A food poisoning that takes away your period too?" Eli quipped with a smirk. I opened my mouth to reject that, but I suddenly remembered. I have missed my period for a week. Just blamed it on stress. Stress of having a sixteen year old daughter hanging out with an abusive boyfriend's son, the stress of having to take care of a eight year old and the stress of having to deal with Eli during his episodes that make me want to pull my hair out. The only thing having me keep going is that, the little Eli is still in there. Dying for a way out of insanity. "I'll go out and buy a pregnancy test. Just stay here." Eli advised as he jumped from the bed and grabbed his car keys from the dresser. "Eli?" I said in a soft voice from the bed. Eli turned around and faced me. "Yeah?" I gulped. "Don't be too long.. I'm scared." I admitted in a small voice. Eli smiled softly, a smile that touched his emerald eyes. He approached me and quickly kissed my lips and smiled. "I won't be long. Count the seconds I'm gone." Eli suggested with a quick Goldsworthy smirk.**

**A thousand seconds later, Eli finally came through the bedroom door with a brown paper bag in his hand. I stayed where I was, my eyes on the brown paper bag. I couldn't believe that my husband had bought a pregnancy test for me, usually Alli or Fiona did that. I was too embarrassed to even walk down the aisle with the sign "Family Planning" knowing of the Trojan condoms and Clearblu Pregnancy tests would glare at me. "Ready?" Eli asked, he had a hand outstretched and a clear smile on his beautiful face. I took a deep breath and nodded, taking Eli's hand and allowing him to help me off the bed and walk me into the bathroom, where he locked the door and handed me the paper bag. "Do you want me to leave or-" I pressed a finger to his sideways lips and smiled. "Stay. I want you too." I said with a sweet smile. Eli took a deep breath. "Okay. But I'll be turned around when your peeing on the stick. That's just a little too awkward." Eli admitted with red cheeks.**

**"How can three minutes feel like three years?" I said with a nervous eyes. Eli looked into my oceans. Emeralds and oceans colliding again. I felt his hand clasped around mine and squeeze it tight. "It's been two minutes Clare. I'll be here with you." Eli murmured the real words to me. I closed my eyes and leaned my head onto Eli's shoulder as the seconds ticked away. I felt myself slowly fall asleep until Eli gently shook me, my eye's flying open. "Time of truth." Eli said with his own pair of nervous eyes. I gulped and nodded as we stood up and approached the pregnancy test which sat lone on the counter. Eli's hand seemed to squeeze tighter as he came into view of the test. I quickly caught with his steps and saw what he saw. A pink plus sign that shone in the bathroom lights. My breathing stopped and Eli's hand grip grew tighter. "This ones a miracle."**

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**DUNDUNDUN! Clare's got a bun in the oven! This baby was the main reason of the sequel, well part of it. Julia was a part, the baby and one other part that'll be revealed. Also, I just thought I'd share that isn't it awkward walking down the family planning aisle and seeing the condoms and tests glare at you? Almost like "Have sex and then buy me!" That's what it feels like to me :/ . OMG! TOMORROW IS DEGRASSI! I have no idea if I'll be posting at all! I mean I'll be caught up with Degrassi! AHHHHHHHHH! (include Demi Lovato's scream during Camp Rock) Lmao! The next chapter will be in Teddy's POV and then Eli's POV :D. More Julia/Teddy/KC Drama coming up! && Don't forget too..**

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	12. Locked Inside

**WARNING: punching, violence, bloody lips, flying down stairs, throwing trashcans, locked doors, climbing through windows, basic life sucks, && LONG RANT OF DEGRASSI! && foul language:/**

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**Chapter Twelve: Locked Inside(Teddy's POV)**

**He was here. My father- wait.. He isn't a father to me. Never has. The man never held me as a baby, never sang me to sleep. He's not a man to begin with. He's KC Guthrie and a menace. A menace with a fist raised to punch the scared girl in my arms. Julia shied away from the punch which was almost being thrown. I quickly threw Julia down onto the ground as soon as the punch landed into my cheek. I fell against the ground and my vision soon became blurry. I tried my best to see what was happening. I could barley see through the fuzzy pupils. My hearing on the other hand-had not been affected at all. "You dirty little whore." KC spat to Julia. I felt anger boil into my veins as he called her such a dirty name. "You think you can just fucking waltz into my fucking house and come into my fucking son's room to fuck him? You more like your father than I thought." KC sneered. I found the strength to get up on my feet. I immediately noticed Julia on the ground under KC's power. KC was hovering over her with his fists held high. "Don't you touch her!" I yelled. KC spun around and smirked. "Learn from your old man Teddy." KC advised. I stood frozen as he swiftly kicked Julia's stomach. A high pained yelp was heard from her trembling body. I felt the tears form in my eyes. "You asshole!" I shouted. I found myself tackling my father on the ground. I struggled under his tremendous weight of muscle. I squirmed and fought for a way out of his tight grasp, but only found myself under a punch or a swift kick. I looked from my peripheral vision to see Julia was struggling off the ground with a bloody mouth. Tears were falling from her dazed emeralds as she spun around for the exit. "Run!" I shouted on the top of my lungs. "Run now! Get in Morty and drive! Drive until you can't any more!" I shouted yet again. "What about you?" Julia yelled, finally finding me, on the ground with my dad on top of me. Her emerald eyes were in complete shock. "RUN!" I shouted again. Julia didn't ask anymore questions as she bolted from the room, scurrying down and away from this madness. "That little bitch!" KC growled. KC sprung off of me and bolted from the room with staggering steps, making him much slower than Julia. I jumped up and ran down the hall, making sure not to slip or fall. I found KC at the end of the hall by the stairs, trying to make his way down. Julia was by the door, trying to open it, but it was locked. "Locked inside. What will you do now?" KC taunted with a devilish smile. "Don't you even think that!" I yelled. I charged towards my father and sent him and myself flying down the stairs. Each bump down the stairs, rattled my brain more and more. KC tried to yell at me, it all came out in slurs. Julia stood frozen by the door, backing away slowly for the back door. The last thump at the bottom, I had KC pinned down. A reflection staring at another. "Get off of daddy, Teddy." KC sneered. "Never in a million years would you be my father." I spat back in his face. KC was always stronger than me. He managed to squirm from my grasp and punch me full force in the jaw. Sending me back. I held my jaw as it screamed in extreme pain. I cursed under my breath and tried to stand up. Everything was way too blurry. I couldn't see straight. As my vision straighten out I saw KC staggering towards Julia who was climbing out a window, her legs sticking out. "Come to KC, Julie. KC won't hurt you." KC cooed in a raspy voice. He was getting closer to her. He would pull her back in and hurt her. I would never forgive myself. I quickly grabbed the closet thing to myself, a trashcan. I hurdled the can at KC's head. Sending him flying forward at the floor. Julia by this time had made it through the window, she didn't have a second glance back as she ran out. KC struggled to stand up, although he was too drunk to do so. He finally collapses and falls asleep, drunk. I turn my back slowly and look out the window, Morty and Julia are gone. I gulped and sighed heavily. Good thing, Julia was safe. She was safe and sound. Bad thing-Julia will never talk to me again. I turned around to face KC and mutter "Nice going asshole."**

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**OMG! I am OMG-ing at the reason of the story AND last night episode! I swear it was amazing! The Alli-Bianca fight was amazing and I wanted to hug Alli when her parents found out about the sexting and her losing her virginity :/, Poor Alli. I'll miss her! Then there's Jenna, I seriously thought she'd win Next Teen Star! I was so shocked when she didn't! KC is still an ass with a softer heart by giving her his sweater so she wouldn't show off her baby bump :D. Although Momma Guthrie is BOSS! Despite that KC/Jenna broke up, Momma Guthrie is THERE for her! && THE NEW PROMO! There is like four? The one after! OMG! I just screamed! Eclare drama, Dolly J, SAV AND JENNA? Drew/Adam/Fiona love triangle? Adam WILL WIN FIONA! I hate Drew right now -.-. Although Eli was crying L. Poor Eli. Then Clare is all "I wanna spend the night with you." O.O AHHHHHH! I just had a panic attack! Then the newest ones have more Eclare and Dolly J. There SO AMAZING! I can't wait until Love Lockdown! So sorry! I HAD TO LET THAT OUT! && Wasn't everyone else happy that Zane and Owen are in the credits? I wanted Fitz there too… :/. BUT YAY ZANE! I love him :D. But anyway! In MY story, its gonna be harder to write now that my suspicions of the second half of season 10 isn't true :/. && Don't forget to..**

**REVIEW?**


	13. Flight Of An Emerald

WARNING: broken wrists, blackouts, lying, daddy's little vampire, flashbacks, baby NAMES! && Degrassi bitches!

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Chapter Thirteen: Flight Of An Emerald (Eli's POV)

"Ouch. Mom that hurts." Willow muttered under her breath. "Sorry Will. You know what the doctor said. Your wrist needs to be elevated." Clare advised Willow. Willow sighed heavily and looked away from her broken wrist. "How'd you get that broken wrist, Will?" I asked from the doorway. Willow spun her head my way and gulped. "I don't know. Like I said in the emergency room. I blacked out at school." Willow said through clenched teeth. "You're a terrible liar, Willow. Tell me the truth." I ordered, I saw though her façade. She was definitely hiding something. Willow just stared with her mouth open a bit. She had nothing to say. "You didn't fall. I know that." I said. Willow swallowed and looked down. "I don't remember, Dad." Willow said sternly. I scoffed. "Don't you dare lie to me Willow Caroline Goldsworthy. Someone hurt you." I said with raised eyebrows. "Okay.. Maybe someone did." Willow said in a soft tone. Clare gasped quietly. "Then tell us Will. Me and your father can talk to the principal. Get this person a suspension." Clare promised. "Or an expulsion." I muttered under my breath. Clare shot me a dirty look before glancing at our broken daughter. "Just tell us, Willow." Clare pleaded. "I don't know who did this to me." Willow said with fake certainty. I sighed heavily as did Clare. After a bout of silence. "I'm tired. Can I go to bed?" Willow asked, looking at Clare for approval. Clare nodded and helped Willow up. "I'll take her to bed. I'll be back down." Clare whispered to me before taking Willow upstairs. I fell onto the couch and threw a arm across my face. This day sure did take a turn for the worst, I was so excited for another baby, then we get a call that Willow had blacked out at school on her way to the yearbook club. There was more to that subtle blackout. Someone had done something to Willow, did something to break her wrist and make her blackout, Alli's son Ian was on his way to detention when finding Willow. Thoughts were put to an abrupt stop when the front door opened. I opened my eyes to find Julia was walking in, more like trembling. She had her hoodie on and was walking slowly to her room. "Julia?" I said loudly. Julia stopped walking, but continued to tremble. "Yeah Dad?" Julia quivered. I stood up and walked towards Julia, an arm outstretched. "Julia? Tell me what's wrong." I asked quietly, taking more steps toward her clad black figure. "Nothing." Julia said absentmindedly. Almost as if she was having a zoning out moment, she was at another place and time. I put a hand on her arm, "Julia p-" I was soon cut off by Julia's immediate flinch as she backed away from me. "Don't touch me." Julia stuttered. I furrowed my brow. "Jules. Tell me what happened. This isn't like you." I accused to my trembling daughter. "Your wrong." Julia lied. I sighed and kept my hand held out. "Just come here." I pleaded. I came to no avail with Julia. I exhaled a long hold of air and used my last hope. Something that would trigger her. "Daddy's little vampire needs to come here. Daddy's little vampire needs to be there for her daddy. Daddy's little vampire needs to be a little monster." I cooed softly. Julia looked up. "You remember." Julia murmured softly. I nodded. "I did come up with it all. You were a little monster." I accused. Julia took a breath of air and collapsed into my arms. "Thank you." I whispered into her hair. Julia broke into sobs into my shoulder. Something happened. I wasn't in the mood for another argument with my other daughter, if Willow was stubborn, Julia was way worse.

"Your still not going to tell me about your fat lip?" I whispered as I carried Julia upstairs. "Nope." Julia said, popping the "p". I scoffed. "So damn stubborn." I accused. Julia smiled. "Well I am your daughter." Julia said with a smirk. I hissed. "Don't be so cocky, Jules." I ordered with a teasing tone. I managed to somehow place Julia under her purple bed sheets as she curled onto her side and sink into her pillow. I bent forward to peck her cheek as she fell into a peaceful slumber. I sighed heavily and allowed memories to flood my mind as I looked at Julia.

"_I can fly! Look Daddy! I can fly!" Julia shouted with much enthusiasm. I snickered as I watched Julia leap off the back porch and land on her feet, running around with her arms out stretched like a airplane. "I see that Jules." I smirked. "My turn! I wanna!" Willow pleaded from the place in my lap. She opened her chubby palm and closed it. "Down daddy! Down daddy!" Willow yelped. I sighed and set her on her feet, her dress floundering by her waist as she ran to join her older sister. "When will you guys be done?" Clare said impatiently by my side, a hand on her protruding stomach. "When the kids are eighteen, then we stop." I promised. Clare rolled her eyes and heaved herself from her chair. "I'll be inside, talking to Jenna." Clare announced. I waved her off and she continuously rolled her eyes as she waddled into the house. I stared off into the blue sky with wonder, how high is the sky? With the idea pondering in my mind, I heard a loud yelp. I turned my attention to Julia, she had jumped off the lowest branch on the small tree, cutting her chin. "Dammit Julia." I cursed as I jogged to her crying figure. Willow stood by her with a hand outstretched. "Help." Willow gurgled with a smile. I sighed and picked Julia up under her arms. Her emeralds were flooded with tears, running down her dirty face and onto her brand freaking new white dress. There was blood coming from her chin, dripping onto her dress. "What did I tell you about climbing trees?" I asked with a firm voice. Julia tried to answer me, but choked sobs came out. "I'll take you inside, but Mommy will be mad at Daddy, You'll probably never be allowed to come outside with Willow anymore." I told Julia as we approached the house, Willow taking my hand. "I-I-I don't care. I just wanna stay with y-you." Julia whimpered into my neck. I sighed, feeling regret in my stomach. "Okay Jules. You'll get to stay with me." I promised. _

Since then, Julia never climbed a tree again. Sure she'll lean against one, but never climb one. I kept my promise, whenever she begged for me. I'd be there, I wasn't about to be a deadbeat like others I know. "Goodnight Jules." I murmured as I left her room, closing the door. I entered my bedroom to find Clare cradling a stomach. "Damn. Did I miss out on nine months?" I asked jokingly. Clare turned around and pulled the pillow under her gown. "As if, I'd be so mad if you did." Clare accused. I smiled. "I've never left you alone at all in those delivery room. Although I did contemplate on it." I admitted. Clare mock slapped my arm, but quickly kissed my neck, trailing the kissing to my lips. Sealing the deal with a kiss. "I was thinking. If we have this baby. We'll need a name for it." Clare said with a smile. "I was thinking "baby"." I joked. Clare rolled her eyes. "Come on. We don't even know if it's a boy or girl." I pointed out. Clare shrugged. "I know, but we should have some on set names. One for a girl and one for a boy." Clare advised. I pondered for a moment and thought. "Why don't we go to sleep?" I said with a huge yawn. Clare smirked. "Nice way of ducking from that one, but I'll continue to taunt for an answer." Clare promised with a devilish smirk. "I'll be here to be tortured with."

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Haha, this was cute, the ending anyway. The thing with Willow, was a way of bringing her into the storyline more, but her breaking her wrist and blacking out WILL be found out. LATER. And the baby name thing, I DO NEED IDEAS! I was thinking Tegan for a boy, but for either way, I will accept baby names! I JUST saw the new promo for next week's episode and Eli was all jumping over desks and shit, I was thinking "DAMN! Munro, a secret gymnast!" Sexiness. I swear that man… He's so damn.. (explodes) Sorry for exploding! :D. Anyway! Don't forget too..,REVIEW?


	14. Silence

**WARNING: JOINT POV'S, kissing, crying, creepy staring, bitchslaps, calling Eli a basket case, FULL BLOWN CATFIGHT!, && steel blood**

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**Chapter Fourteen: Silence (Teddy & Julia's POV)**

**Teddy's POV:**

**Would she talk to me? If I walked up to her.. Would she acknowledge me? Or would she brush me off as some freak who stalks her? Most likely she'll just ignore me. I do understand. My drunk of a father had attacked her and myself last night. I'm looking at her now. She's walking down the hall with her little sister, Willow. Something must have happened to her, her wrist was in a cast and Julia was helping her carry her books. Lilith had told me about that, someone had jumped Willow and made her blackout. She seemed alright-both of them. Julia was sporting a fat lip, I sighed heavily and looked away. This was my fault. I'm such an idiot for doing this to her in the first place. How can I be so inconsiderate? What kind of man does that? "Hey Teddy." Yvonne chirped happily. I looked up from my place on the ground, leaning against my locker. "Oh.. Hey Y." I said with a fake smile. Yvonne cocked an eyebrow. "What's going on Ted?" Yvonne asked with her hands on her swayed hips. I shrugged and began picking at a piece of string on my shirt. I heard Yvonne slid down the lockers next to me. "Spit it out Teddy." Yvonne urged. Silence followed her failed pursuit. "Teddy Guthrie. I demand you to tell me, your girlfriend what's on your mind." Yvonne ordered. I turned my head to look at her, her grey eyes held confusement and somewhat anger. "Nothing." I sneered. I immediately wanted to take it back as I saw the hurt look on her face. Her face scrunching in a pout like sadness. "Y.. Don't.. Cry." I pleaded as I saw big fat tears well up in her eyes. Yvonne wiped her hand across her eye, a huge black streak coming off onto her pale skin. "Dammit." Yvonne cursed. Yvonne looked up at me with blotches of black under her pale eyelids. "Your just so _mean._" Yvonne said thickly. I gulped and felt a stir of regret. "I like you so damn much, Teddy. So much." Yvonne admitted, her voice still thick. I continued to stay silent, her rant wasn't over. "Your just treating me like shit. What kind of boyfriend does that? Seriously-who does?" Yvonne asked with pleading eyes. I sighed and put a hand behind her curly hair and pulled her face towards mine and kissed her sweetly on the lips. Yvonne seemed to restrain from the kiss, but soon was deeply into the kiss. I opened my eyes to see that Julia was peeking at us from afar. She quickly looked away and ran a hand through her hair. I felt more regret in my stomach. I was hurting her even more. When the kiss broke, I was still watching Julia as she started walking down the hall. "Teddy?" Yvonne asked with a giggle. I didn't pay attention as my gaze was still on her. "What are y-" Yvonne stopped mid sentence as she saw that I was staring after Julia, absent mindedly. Yvonne gasped and I felt a hard smack across my face. I was pulled from my reverie. "What the hell?" I shouted as I cupped my redden cheek. Yvonne huffed, "That was for staring at my best friend while we were kissing!" Yvonne accused. I gulped as I saw Yvonne stand up and brush the dirt off her black dress. I quickly stood up and faced Yvonne. "Y.. Please.. You-" I stuttered, Yvonne held her hand up. "I need to think about this." Yvonne silenced me. I swallowed back my words I wanted to say and Yvonne forced a chuckle. "This all makes sense, why you were so happy to be her partner, why she stayed at your house, when I've never been there." Yvonne said, talking to herself. Yvonne scoffed and started walking down the hall Julia rounded the corner at. "Yvonne! What are you going to do?" I shouted. Yvonne flipped her brown curls and continued to strut down the hallway, rounding the corner where Julia was at. "Shit." I muttered, realized what Yvonne was thinking.**

**Julia's POV:**

**I quickly walked down the hall, he was staring at me. At _me. _I shook my head. He's a bastard, nothing more than a bastard. I mean, he was staring at me while kissing my best friend, what ass does that. Teddy Guthrie. He may have thrown his drunk father down the stairs to save me, but still.. I didn't need saving. I made it out fine. I sighed as my heart thudded quickly in my ribcage. Shit was bound to hit the fan. "Hey! Best friend Julia!" Yvonne shouted from down the hall. I quickly turned on my heel to see Yvonne power walk fast to me, her face scrunched up in anger, her grey eyes held revenge. "Thanks a lot for being a boyfriend stealer!" Yvonne sneered. I furrowed my brows. "Boyfriend stealer?" I asked curiously. "Don't pretend, Julia. I saw the way Teddy was staring at you. What happened when you went to his house?" Yvonne questioned. I gulped. I couldn't tell Yvonne what had happened, that his dad's a horrible drunk who attacked me and Teddy. At the same time, Yvonne looked as if she'd kill me. "Spit it out Goldsworthy." Yvonne taunted. I swallowed and backed away. I wasn't ready for any of this. _Dammit Teddy._ I thought. "Don't have anything to say?" Yvonne taunted some more, she threw her black purse on the ground and pushed me back with her long black nails. Her lips curling into a grimace. My backpack falling off my shoulders as she pushed me back. "Bring it on." Yvonne teased with a smirk. I sighed. "Not here, Y. I don't want to fight you." I stated. Yvonne snickered. "That's because when I kick your sorry pathetic ass, you'll go crying home to your basket case of a father." Yvonne sneered. That struck a chord. "You bitch!" I cursed as I slapped Yvonne hard across the face. Yvonne gasped and grabbed my hair, I grabbed her as we struggled to kick and slap each other, we slipped and found ourselves on the floor, I felt her nails try to claw at my face, I slapped her hard across the face and she retorted by butting her head with mine, sending me back. Yvonne jumped on me and punched my face, more of my eye. I felt immediate pain and despite that I saw from one eye, I grabbed her hair and slammed her head into the locker. Our fight was brought to an abrupt stop as I saw someone pull Yvonne off me and I was pulled off. I saw Victoire had Yvonne in a tight grip, and I felt strong and familiar arms grasp me. Mr. Simpson was between us, his aged face looked pissed. "In my office." Mr. Simpson said dreary. I felt the strong arm guide me to the office as Victoire guided Yvonne, Yvonne had a huge red welt across her face and a bleeding nose. I too could taste blood in my mouth. I looked up to see Teddy had me firmly, not letting me go. I sighed and allowed his arms to guide me to the office, There was silence between us for a long while, until Teddy broke it, "Lick your lips. You have a lot of blood around your lips." Teddy advised. I licked my lips, tasting the steel taste of blood. I didn't thank him or acknowledge him as he took me to the office, Yvonne far from me. I stared straight ahead, awaiting for the tremendous trouble I'd be receiving.**

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**CATFIGHT! Lmao, This one deff' centers around the love triangle, Hmm, I don't have much to say today :/. Odd… I'll probably post again today XD. Next chapter will possibly in Julia's POV and it'll be months in advanced. && don't forget too..REVIEW?**


	15. Eavesdropping

**WARNING: insanity, washroom lunches, washroom pregnancy, aborting, nip it in the bud, && BLAH BLAH!**

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**Chapter Fifteen: Eavesdropping (Julia's POV)**

**Will I slowly go insane? Can anyone go insane? No one that I know is actually insane.. But if I did. I'd ask them what it feels like to be lonely. I mean, since their insane, they must have that feeling that no one understands how hard it is to be lonesome. I'd relate to that person. Whoever it is. I'd eat lunch with that person and we'd make each other's company. We'd be best friends. Yet, are crazy people allowed to have friends? You know without going psychotic and trying to hurt people. Would that be hardest life to live? It would. I would definitely feel for those people. What is making me think of this nonsense of crazy people? Well. I feel like I'll be going crazy if I continue to have no one to talk too. Here I am, Julia Anne Goldsworthy, spending her lunch in the girls washroom. Sitting on the toilet with my sandwich in my lap and a soda sitting on the container for "feminine products". I sighed and looked around at the sharpie covered white stalls. Many names of boys.. And shit talk of girls. I still spot mine about Yvonne. I wrote her name in big bold letters, full name. YVONNE JAQUELINE TORRES IS A FUGLY BITCH-WHORE-SLUT. Yeah, lets just say that I have to spend detention for a week for vandalizing the school. The doors suddenly opened and I froze. No one ever really comes into this washroom, it's the old one that isn't as fancy and new as the one newly built. "What do you have to tell me, Y?" Victoire's nasally voice squawked. Shit. "It's very important-is anyone else in here?" Yvonne said quickly, I saw her flats from underneath the stall door, I cradled my knees to my chest, smashing my happy peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Yvonne looked underneath the door, and didn't see me. Luckily. I heard a bag being unzipped and the sound of a paper bag. "What the- Yvonne! Are you serious!" Victoire exclaimed. I inched forward, yearning to hear of Yvonne's "problem". "Yeah.. I've not been myself." Yvonne said in a small voice she uses when she's troubled. Victoire groaned and I heard clicks of her heels around the washroom floor. "Dammit, Yvonne. I can't believe your this stupid. Why'd you do it?" Victoire gasped. There was a pause. "I just really liked him, Vic. I still do, I may even love him. I just- I need to-I need to know for sure." Yvonne explained with many pauses. "Both mom and dad would kill you if they knew about this." Victoire warned Yvonne. "I know. That's why you're not telling mom or dad about this. No matter what. I never told mom and dad about your "situation" you had last year." Yvonne said, most likely with a smirk. "Yeah, but that was just a STD scare, Y. This is more serious. You could be pregnant. A teenage mom. Just like Jenna was." Victoire warned Yvonne. I took a intake of air. Pregnant? Yvonne's.. pregnant? Or she might be. I felt a strange tear in my heart, at first I didn't know where this tear was coming from. Then I realized, I knew who the father was. Teddy. Teddy and Yvonne had sex? Yvonne never told me.. It must've happened during summer break for her to realize the symptoms, hell Mom has been going through them every morning with a fake smile on her face. "I won't be a teenage mom. Trust me, that's way to embarrassing. Just let me take the test in peace." Yvonne spat. There was silence as Yvonne entered the stall next to mine, I could hear her tearing the package and dropping the box to the floor. The strange sound of her urinating and then exiting the stall. "So.. What now?" Victoire asked sort of spaced out. After the sound of rushing water was turned off, Yvonne sighed. "We wait it out. Three minutes of waiting." I sat there patiently alone while Victoire paced back and forth, I followed her feet as they clicked pass my stall. "I think its been three minutes." Yvonne said in a small voice after a couple of minutes. Victoire stopped pacing and approached Yvonne by the sink. "Oh crap." Yvonne squawked. Victoire gulped and moved closer to Yvonne. "Oh Y.. I'm so sorry." Victoire said sympathetically. Was she pregnant? Sure sounded like she was. "Your sorry? I should be! Teddy should! This is our mistake. I can't believe I'm fucking pregnant Vic! I'm not that type of girl who gets knocked up! Urgh! This is Teddy's fault!" Yvonne sneered. "You can't possibly blame this on Teddy, are you?" Victoire asked. Yvonne scoffed, "Of course. He impregnated me. Therefore, its his fault." Yvonne said with a nasty tone. Victoire chuckled hardly. "Damn your so dense, Y. It's obviously your fault also. I mean-who suggested it? Who seduced who?" Victoire questioned. There was a slight pause and a gulp. "I guess I did. We were just making out and well.. I took my top off and my bra.. After that I pulled a condom out and he put it on. It's suppose to protect us!" Yvonne exclaimed. "Not all the time, Y. Haven't you seen enough teenage sitcoms to know that condoms don't always protect you? There's always a chance." Victoire explained. Yvonne sighed heavily. "I can't raise a baby." Yvonne said quietly. "Than what the hell are you going to do? Adoption?" Victoire asked. Yvonne sighed again. "No.. Birth is too painful. I'd most likely get attached to the baby during the pregnancy and won't keep the end of the deal." Yvonne said truthfully. "Then the only option left is abortion." Victoire suggested. "If that's my only option.." Yvonne trailed off. "Wait-seriously? Your going to abort your baby?" Victoire exclaimed. "It's the only way mom and dad won't know. Plus Teddy won't have to stress about it. If you take me to a clinic with a fake doctor note, then I can't just nip it in the bud and have a happy life." Yvonne explained. "Yvonne. Don't you realize your killing a baby that has a life to live?" Victoire reminded Yvonne. "I know. But this baby's life would be fucked up. I'm doing it a favor." Yvonne said surely. There was another bout of silence, the only sound was my racing heart. "When can we possibly go?" Yvonne asked. "I'll make an appointment for tomorrow after school. There's a clinic not that far from here. With a fake note, we'll get out of it and make sure that this baby will have a nice life in heaven." Victoire assured her twin. "Thanks Vic. I knew I could rely on you. Let's go, the bells about to ring." Yvonne gushed. There footsteps left and the door swung shut. I allowed my cramped legs to fall to the ground in awestruck. Yvonne was pregnant with Teddy's baby and was going to abort it? I gulped and looked down at the smashed sandwich. My thoughts going to Teddy. How would he feel if he knew his own baby would be killed? I allowed a held breath to escape my mouth and I stood up with my half eaten lunch in my hand. I walked from the stall and dumped my lunch in the trashcan, watching it fall on a unholy pink plus sign.**

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**Sorry for not updating, I've been having writers block :P. Sucks, plus I've been too busy looking up Eli pictures XD. That boys too handsome for words. Anyway, big shocker! && I don't have that much to say besides TWO MORE DAYS UNTIL LOVE LOCKDOWN! Eclare and Dolly J! My two favorites! Don't forget to..**

**REVIEW?**

**PS: SORRY FOR BIG BLOCKY CHAPTER :P.**


	16. Done

**WARNING: Yvonne's lies, teddy's anger, Julia's prissy, BREAK UP SCENE!**

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**Chapter Sixteen: Done (Teddy's POV)**

**"Why weren't you here yesterday?" I questioned as Yvonne walked over to greet me with a kiss. Yvonne froze, she bit her lip and looked up at me with big grey eyes. "What's the matter? You okay?" I asked, my heart racing a bit fast as I cupped her face in my hands. Yvonne smiled and shook her head. "Nothing. I just had a migraine yesterday." Yvonne explained. I raised an eyebrow at her. "Don't lie, Y. Tell me the truth." I asked with a small smile that seemed to always make her smile. Yvonne shook her head. "I'm not lying Teddy. I had a migraine. I swear to God." Yvonne said again. I sighed and decided not to pressure her any further. I knew that she was lying. Whenever she lies she won't look the person in the eyes. "Fine. I believe you." I lied. Yvonne saw through my façade and grinned. Yvonne stood up on her toes and pressed her lips to mine. I wrapped my arms around her waist and held her close as we kissed. I still felt nothing from the kiss. No real feeling through her thin lips. Nothing at all. I was never really excited, never got that heart racing feel in my chest when we kissed. I silently sighed and allowed the kiss to continue. As long as it made her happy. **

**I've never felt more alone than in Math. I couldn't continue on the problem with Julia in front of me. Her jagged dark brown hair creating a veil around her face. A veil meant to keep her away from me. The veil stays up until the period is over, she gives me no glance as she gathers her belongings and walks away. That was the usual I've been living with for the past two weeks. I've been given the cold shoulder that's the coldest I've ever seen from a girl. I closed my textbook and sigh as the class begins to flood out. Yvonne skipped gleefully to my desk with a smile. "Walk me to class?" Yvonne chirped. I opened my mouth to say yes, but I closed it. "No." I said. Yvonne's smile fell as confusement gathered on her pale face. "You did nothing. I just have to take care of some things." I lied smoothly with a smile. Yvonne sighed and composed a smile on her face. She's so gullible when it comes to anything. "Alright. I'll see you at lunch?" Yvonne quipped with perky grey eyes. I nodded and bent forward for a quick peck on her thin lips. Yvonne smiled as she walked away and out the door. I gathered my belongings and slung my backpack over my shoulder and headed in the opposite direction from my next class. Her next class has to be history. I believe I remember her saying how dreadful it is listening to Mr. Harp's lectures. I looked down the row of lockers that included Julia's. I found Julia at her locker, grabbing her history textbook. I power walked down the hall and the sound of quicken pace made her look my way. I heard her groan as I approached her. "What the hell do you want Teddy." Julia said annoyed. "It's killing me Jules." I admitted. Julia glared at me as I used her nickname. "Sorry. It's just hard Julia. I want us to be friends." I admitted again. Julia slammed her locker. "As if. Last time I tried that, I almost got attacked by your drunken father." Julia spat. Despite that she was right, I still felt a slash at my heart. He was my father. I only have one. She wouldn't appreciate it if I said horrible things about her father, I already know she's overprotective of him after Yvonne's comment on his behavior. "I know. He has a problem." I said. Julia chuckled harshly. "It's more than a problem, Teddy." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "Look. I just need to talk to you. I want to be your friend." I said with a pleading look. Julia exhaled loudly through her mouth. "You don't need me. In fact, Yvonne might need you." Julia said harshly on Yvonne's name. I furrowed my brows. "Yvonne? Why would Yvonne need my help?" I asked confusement must be clear on my face. "Someone will need to drive her to the abortion clinic if Victoire couldn't." Julia sneered. Julia then walked around me harshly. I stood dumbfounded and I grabbed her arm and pulled her back. "What do you mean?" I asked firmly. "Get the fuck off me." Julia scowled with hatred in her emerald eyes. I tightened my grip on her arm. "Not until you tell me what happened." I said aggressively. "Fine! Let me go! People are staring." Julia said lowly. I let her go as she rubbed her arm where I grabbed her too tightly. People began to flood out to their next classes. "I overheard Yvonne and Victoire in the washroom. Yvonne's pregnant." Julia admitted lowly. I stood frozen. As if I forgot to breathe. Yvonne was pregnant, with my baby. "Your lying.." I said softly. Julia shook her head. "I'm not. Worst part is, Yvonne doesn't want it. She's getting it aborted." Julia said with depth. I scoffed. "I can't.. Why.." I couldn't make complete sentences. After what seemed like hours to me, I looked up to see that Julia was gone. I looked around for her, but she was gone. As were the students. I felt as if I was drawn from the world. Yvonne was pregnant, but she aborted the baby. Our baby. My baby. The shock soon wore off, but was quickly replaced with anger. Yvonne wants to see me at lunch. She'll see a side of me at lunch that she's never seen. **

**I stormed through the halls of Degrassi with pure anger. I've managed to keep the anger bottled like soda about to explode in a bottle. I pushed past some freshmen to get into the cafeteria. I searched for Yvonne and saw her at the circular table with Victoire, Jeanette and Lyla. I stormed quickly to her, Lyla pointed me out to Yvonne with a scared look on her face. Yvonne turned around and bounced from her seat to me. "Hey-" I didn't even let her finished as I growled. "Your pregnant?" Yvonne stood frozen, as did Victoire, Jeanette, and Lyla. Yvonne gulped. "Who told you?" Yvonne asked in a quivered voice. "Julia did. She was in the washroom when she heard you and Victoire talking about it." I explained in harsh voice. Yvonne cursed under her breath and looked at me. "Look. It's all taken care of." Yvonne assured me with a hand on my arm. I pulled my arm back and scoffed. "Aborting a human life is going to solve your problems Yvonne!" I shouted. The cafeteria erupted in gasps. At the moment, I didn't care. There was only me and Yvonne. "I had too! I'm not ready to be a mother!" Yvonne shouted in her defense. "So! That baby deserved a life! There is always adoption! Now that baby is dead! It never got a chance to breathe or look at the world!" I gasped. "You killed our baby." I breathed finally. Yvonne stared at me in wonder. Her grey eyes were crying as I shouted at her with true words. "Because you did that, I can't be with you." I said in a soft voice. Yvonne covered her face with her hands. "No.." Yvonne pleaded. "I can't do this. I was never happy. It was wrong for us to think this would work out. I'm sorry Yvonne. We're done." I spat, I turned on a heel and walked out of a silent cafeteria. Leaving a crying girl. **

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**WOW! Yeah, I've been anticipating a Yvonne/Teddy break up scene! I hated those two together, it never would've worked out. && DID YOU GUYS SEE LOVE LOCKDOWN? Amazing! I swear, Declan looks insane, I don't believe that he raped Holly J, he pressured her. But he didn't force her down and raped her. Then Clare's problem with her parents :[. I feel so bad for her, but her and Eli's matching piercing! LMAO! I think its cute, but my favorite part was when Clare grabbed Eli's hand and they ran across stage and Eli looked at Clare's parents with a "yeah, I'm totally with your daughter!" Then the new promos! DAVE TASES WESLEY! I cried. :[. So much is happening, I'll seriously cry when that scene happens, that and when Clare's parents divorce (Her dad says so) She'll go through hell. I just want Eli there for her. Anyway! Now that's out of my system! Sorry for not updating, writers block && massive homework. Blehh High School HW! && Next chapter will be focusing on Eli/Clare, THE BIG CHAPTER! I do believe it is. A LOT OF CRAP IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN! && Don't forget to..**

**REVIEW? **


	17. Deadly Accident

WARNING: a very disturbing Eli episode that CHANGES YOUR LIFE, you'll never be the same, I'm not O.O

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Chapter Seventeen: Deadly Accident (Clare's POV)

_5 Months Later:_

It's a cool February night. I stirred awake to find myself in Eli's arms. His strong arms protective around me and our baby. Our baby boy. We aren't certain that it's a boy, but I have a gut feeling that it's a boy. Just a mother's instinct. We had decided on names. If the baby turned out to be a girl we decided to name her Genevieve Elizabeth Goldsworthy, Eli had picked out Genevieve's name, he wanted a unique touch to her name and her aunt's name as her middle name. Of course, Eli always wants a girl. I smiled remembering that huge grin on his face when Julia was born.

"_I can't! Eli! I can't!" I panted heavily. The pain was unbearable. I've never felt so much pain in my lower abdomen before. "It's okay Clare! Her's heads out! She looks beautiful!" Eli encouraged with a reassuring smile. "She's covered in blood! How are you so sure that she's beautiful!" I shouted at him while trying to withstand the pain. Eli kept quiet as the doctor ordered more pushes. "Clare. You just need to give me your hardest push. The shoulders are the hard part, once that's over, the rest of her will slip out." The doctor advised me. I nodded reverently and with my hand intertwined with Eli's. I pushed as hard as I ever had. Screaming at the top of my lungs. I squeezed Eli's hand so much, I heard him wince beside me. I loosened my grip for his sake and continued to push. Finally the cries echoed in the room. "Congratulations! It's a baby girl!" The doctor announced. In his hands was a pink, bloody baby girl. Our baby girl. __She was screaming her head off with bloody murder. I relaxed into the mattress and felt Eli's lips to my own. "I'm so proud of you, Clare. We have our miracle." Eli whispered. I opened my eyes to see that Eli was crying, his emerald eyes were filled with tears of joy. Weakly I placed a hand on his cheek and smiled. "I love you." I whispered. "I love you too." Eli murmured, a soft kiss planted on my nose. "Would you like to cut the chord?" The nurse asked Eli. Eli hesitated and I patted his face. "Go. Cut her chord." I encouraged him. Eli nodded and I lifted my head to see him snip the chord, causing the baby to scream more. "Don't worry. All babies do that." The nurse advised Eli. Eli nodded, most likely thought he caused his two minute old daughter pain. "Here she is." The nurse murmured as she placed the baby in Eli's arms. Eli held her as if he knew how to hold a baby. Her head supported on his arm. Her eyes were still closed as Eli walked over to me slowly. "She's precious." Eli murmured, unable to take his eyes off our daughter. "Let me hold her." I whispered. Eli cautiously placed her in my arms, the baby whimpered as she realized she was being switched from Eli's arms to mine, but quickly settled. After taking a long look at her, I looked up at Eli. "She looks just like you." I whispered. Eli smirked. "How are you so sure?" Eli asked, taking a seat on the chair next my cot. "I've seen pictures of you as a baby. Chubby cheeks, plump lips, thick dark brown hair. She'll be a clone verified if she has your green eyes." I said with a smile. As if she had heard us, the baby opened her eyes and showed off beautiful emerald eyes. "She's definitely your daughter." I whispered in amazement. "Julia." Eli murmured. My head turned quickly to his face. Was he having an episode? Please.. Not here. "You okay?" I asked concerned. Eli nodded. I checked to see that his eyes weren't glazed over. "Her name's Julia." Eli told me. "Are you okay with that?" I questioned, looking down at our daughter, dozing peacefully in my arms. "Of course. Julia would love if I named my daughter after her. Julia meant a lot to me. She deserves recognition." Eli explained. I smiled. "It's perfect. I can see her being a Julia. Julia Goldsworthy." I said with a huge grin. "Julia Anne Goldsworthy." _

A huge smile erupting on my face. Eli was so proud that day. He was proud of me being able to give birth and he was proud that he was able to accomplish able to having a daughter despite he's a schizophrenic. Eli, he was so worried that Julia would develop the symptoms and eventually have schizophrenia, but thankfully she didn't. We're just waiting to see if Willow or Bentley have it. Then we'll be waiting for this baby as well. I felt a firm kick in my abdomen from our baby. I winced, feeling as if our baby boy was practicing being a drummer in there. More reasons I believe this baby is a boy, opposed to Eli believing it's a girl. I do prefer the boy's name over the girl's. Munro. Eli laughed out loud as I chose that name for our son. Although when I poke fun at Genevieve's name, Eli shuts up. I've chosen his full name to be, Munro Tegan Goldsworthy. The name had no significance like Genevieve's having her aunt's name as her middle name. Munro Tegan Goldsworthy is unique, very bold to me. Everybody would know him, He'd be a bold character. Thoughts put on hold as Eli moaned loudly and held me closer, putting painful pressure on the baby. "Eli.. Loosen your grip." I said, trying to pry his steel hand off my stomach. "No.." Eli said through clenched teeth. Clenched teeth. Oh God.. "Eli.. Please.." I pleaded with him more louder. My hands trying hard to release the grip. Finally the grip was loosened and I rolled from bed, landing on my feet. I saw through the dim light that Eli was out of bed as well, His stance was rigid. His emerald eyes were glazed. Full of a murderous glare at my stomach. I protectively wrapped my arms around my stomach. He hasn't had a fit in months. I was hoping he wouldn't until the baby was born. "Eli.. Just stay calm.." I pleaded as I inched toward my purse on the floor, his needle was inches away. Eli charged at me and pinned me against the wall. "Don't you fucking dare poison me. I'm sick of it!" Insanity spat at me. He was no longer Eli, his insane side had taken over. "You..You need to let go.." I gasped through choked voice. I felt a hard kick on my stomach. Little Munro crying out in help. He could feel my pain. "Why? So you could just take your purse, grab the needle and stab me? I know the routine!" Insanity sneered. I choked as I felt my airways start to give out. "I told you that one of these days, he won't make it out. Today's the day." Insanity promised. I swiftly kicked him in the stomach, he doubled over and I grabbed my purse and ran from the room, down the hall. I frantically grabbed the needle and my phone, thrusting the phone in my pocket in case I needed it, the needle in my hand and the purse thrown aside. I had the needle ready for injection. Eli appeared from the bedroom with a hungry look in his emerald eyes. "Don't do this to Eli, Clare. You'll hurt him." Insanity said in a taunting tone. "Just let him go!" I shouted, the needle before me. "No.. I'm not ever letting him go. As for you.." Insanity suddenly charged quickly and I tried to stab the needle into his neck, but he grabbed the needle and threw it aside, skidding down the hall. "I've been dealing with voices, disturbing everything! You just knock me out until it happens again! I'M DONE!" Eli shouted. It sounded like Eli, as if he was mixed with insanity. Eli's hand firmly on my shoulders and I felt myself being thrown down the stairs. I screamed as the pain hit my head, my stomach. I hit the floor with a loud thud, I grasped at my stomach, feeling immediate pain. Worse than childbirth contractions. "JULIA!" I shouted loudly. I saw through blurry eyes that Julia rushed from her room, the needle in hand, Eli spun around, his focus on Julia, Julia stabbed him quickly in the neck with scared emerald eyes. "Daddy..?" Julia whimpered, her expression frightened. "Julia.." I whimpered. Eli staggered, the needle stuck in his neck, I lastly remember seeing Julia rush down the stairs with tears rushing down her face, Eli falling with his eyes rolling into the back of his head, and the pain growing more and more in my stomach.

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…. Are there any words to describe this chapter? This was the big thing the whole sequel was about. && I did go with some people requesting that the baby's name be Munro XD. So I went with Munro Tegan Goldsworthy and Genevieve Elizabeth Goldsworthy. Might I also mark this chapter that NOTHING will ever be the same ever again after this. Eli's worst episode yet. I also might recommend that I listened to Kate Voegele's cover of Hallelujah. It'll be on the Make Believe soundtrack :D. The song's powerful and I listened to it over and over listening to it. OH! And today I was watching Gigantic, since usually after Degrassi episodes I'm too hyped to even get into Gigantic, have any of you seen it? Do any of you even like it? My expression was like.. O.o. The blond chick looks like a man, Tony Oller is so handsome XD, that Joey guys cute but he has a baby? && That big chick's cool I guess. Anyway, the show sucks to me. I'll never watch it :P, too stupid to me. && Don't forget too..

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	18. Miscarriage

WARNING: highly emotional episode, may leave you in tears ;-(

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Chapter Eighteen: Miscarriage (Clare and Julia's POV)

Clare's POV:

Everything was blurry. My hearing, my eyesight, my touch. Everything felt so off. My mind was going a million miles per hour. I knew what had happened, the events before this.

"_Mom!" Julia shrieked. Julia rushed down the stairs with speed. She kneeled before me and checked me frantically. "Oh my god! Your bleeding!" Julia shouted, she placed a hand on my leg, to show blood on her fingertips. I felt the rush of blood coming from the space between my legs. Blood while pregnant, this wasn't a good sign. "Oh my god! What do I do? What has just happened?" Julia said frantically. Julia's emerald eyes were frightened as she scanned the room and turned her head to watch Eli stumble backwards and black out. "Daddy!" Julia shouted, her immediate attention on her father, Julia scampered to get up, I quickly grabbed her ankle. "Don't." I ordered. "He's my dad! I have to help him! I don't know what I did! I just stabbed him!" Julia cried out, my grip became tighter on her ankle. "Grab the phone in my pocket, call 911. The baby… It hurts.. When this all blows over.. I'll explain.. Just please Jules.. Do this for Mommy." I pleaded in a hoarse voice. Julia nodded and rummaged into my pockets for the phone, flipping it open and quickly dialing 911. I let my head roll, I looked up the stairs. Eli was out cold, the needle sticking out. I whimpered, longing for him to wake up and help me. Help me and our baby. __I placed a hand on my stomach, longing to feel a impatient kick. A kick of pain.. Anything. There was nothing to feel. _

The paramedics took both me and Eli here to the hospital. Julia drove Willow and Bentley I suppose. I have no idea if everyone else is out there. This was all so embarrassing. I couldn't control my own husband. I can't keep my own word and because of that, I got thrown down a flight of stairs and is lying in a hospital. I blame myself solely for the reason we're here.

Julia's POV:

Waiting. I hate waiting. It's worse waiting in a hospital. Waiting to see if that loved one is okay, see if they made it through their surgery or if the baby is a boy or girl. My mind automatically going to Mom and the baby. Of course I heard the racket from my room, but like the little girl I am, I just curled up on my bed and put my headphones on, but even Dad's screaming was louder than the screamo music I listen to. I contemplated on going out into the hall and seeing if I could help.. Whatever Dad was going through. He needed help to get through it. Just as I was walking away from the door, Mom's yelp of a cry, my name was ringing through the house. I rushed out the door, to see Mom was rolling down the stairs, my heart stopped. I immediately saw that Dad was glaring down at her. I haven't seen him in a fit like this.. Ever. I noticed a needle by the bedroom door, uncapped and all. Ready for injecting. _"I'm sorry Eli, I have to inject you. You'll be better." _I've heard Mom say that during many of Dad's fits. She used this needle to stop him from getting out of control. I quickly grabbed the needle, Mom yelped my name once more, she was clutching at her stomach. Dad spun on his heel, his emerald eyes were glazed over, his usual smirk was curled into a devilish grin. His stance was ready for attack. I saw him charge at him and just did what my instincts told me to. I stabbed the needle into his neck. I had no clue what I had done. Dad's eyes started to lose the glaze, and were just blurry and dazed. I whimpered his name as he staggered back, his eyes rolling into the back of his head. Was he dead? That was the first though running through my mind. Did I just kill my father? I switched attention from his staggering figure to Mom, who was barely hanging on at the bottom of the stairs. Her bleeding figure, the baby.. The baby.. "Julia?" I shot my head up to see Fiona was next to me. Her grey eyes were filled with tears. "Honey are you alright? Do you need me and Adam to check you into a doctor room?" Fiona asked softly. I hadn't even realized that Fiona or Adam were here. I turned my head to see Adam on my other side, he was holding my hand. His blue eyes were rimmed with tears. I've never seen Adam cry, never. He was always smiles, but now that his best friends were on a verge of death. His smiling wall has broken. I looked around at the room dazed, Willow and Bentley were asleep on the couch, Alli and Dave were looking at me intently from the row of chairs across from us. Zachary was awake, his body used for Ian to sleep on. Zachary looked at me with non smiling brown eyes. As if he was manning up and ready to take in what had happened like a man. I looked around the room to see to my surprise, Victoire and Yvonne. Victoire was slowly starting to fall asleep on the couch, Yvonne was wide eyed, looking at me with sad grey eyes. Almost as if she was the old Yvonne. My best friend. I didn't say anything as Adam softly rubbed my hand with his thumb and Fiona leaned her head on my shoulder. I continued to have this stare with Yvonne, trying to figure her blank emotion out. Yvonne nodded her head in the direction of the entrance. I looked back to see Teddy was standing there, a massive case of bed head and he had arrived in his pajamas, like the rest of us. Teddy's eyes met mine and I charged from the embrace of Adam and Fiona and charged at him. I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his shoulder. Weeping heavily. Teddy wrapped his arms around my waist. "Oh Julia.. I was so worried. Yvonne called-" I looked up at Teddy's worried eyes. "Yvonne called you?" I asked, Teddy nodded. "She called saying there was a emergency, that something happened with your parents and you. That all of you were at the hospital." I looked back at Yvonne who's eyes were closed. Most likely, she was faking her sleep. "Are you okay? Are your parents okay?" Teddy asked quickly. I shook my head. "I don't know, Teddy. I saw a side of my father I've never seen. I just really need someone to hold okay?" I said in a choked voice. Teddy nodded and I latched onto his tall figure. "I won't let you go." Teddy promised, sealing it with arms around me.

Clare's POV:

I slowly opened my eyes to a piercing white light. I squinted until I adjusted to the light. I looked around to see I was alone in the room, no other person to share the hospital room with. I sighed, realizing I had survived the fall. I wasn't badly hurt. I felt soreness on my back and my head throbbed, but besides that I was fine. I quickly placed my hand on my stomach. There was no stomach. I sat up and saw there was no stomach, it was flat. Flat as it always was before my pregnancy. I lifted up the gown to see a long bandage around my lower abdomen. I quickly looked around for the baby. Was he born early? I grabbed the nurse button and pressed it. Soon enough a nurse came bustling in with a smile. "Oh your awake, Mrs. Goldsworthy. Do you need pain medication?" The nurse questioned. I shook my head. "I want to know where my baby is. He isn't in my stomach." I ordered, still looking around for a baby in the hospital crib. The nurse's face fell. "I didn't want to be the one to tell you, Mrs. Goldsworthy." The nurse said sympathetically. I furrowed my brows. "Tell me what?" I asked. The nursed sighed. "Your baby died. During the fall, the baby was jolted so much that he died when you hit the impact at the bottom." The nurse explained. My world froze. He was dead. My baby was dead. Munro was dead? "No.." I whimpered, I kept a blank stare ahead. "You have to be lying. I have a baby. He was here." I jabbed a finger to my empty stomach. "He can't just _die_ He has a life. I demand to see him." I ordered. The nurse sighed. "I'm sorry, but he's dead Mrs. Goldsworthy. The only evidence we have to show you is his dead body, which is in the morgue. You've miscarried your son." The nurse explained. I gasped for air. My baby was dead. It couldn't-It wouldn't. I finally doubled over and sobbed. I've never sobbed this heavily and greatly before. I felt the tears sting my eyes as they rushed down a mile a minute.

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…. Wow. So THIS was the main reason for the sequel, I wanted Eli/Clare to have another baby only for the baby to be killed because of Eli. This was easy to write, so I have some anticipated chapter coming up, where Julia finds out the truth! && Teddy and Julia AREN'T dating, it may seem that way, but they aren't. Yvonne just called him so Julia could have someone to be there for her while Yvonne couldn't. Yvonne isn't THAT big of a raging bitch. && don't forget too..

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	19. Depression

WARNING: if you thought I just went there with a miscarriage, then your sadly mistaken, more to leave you on the edge of your 'effing seat, just sayin'.

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Chapter Nineteen: Depression (Eli's POV)

I didn't feel as if I belonged anymore. I've never felt so alone. The house wasn't the same to me anymore, the deadly stairs. Even my own children are afraid of me. As soon as they get home, they go straight to their room and lock the doors. Afraid that I'll have another episode. I know I need to tell them. Especially Julia. The feeling in my heart, it aches like a serious mother fucker, as much as I rarely use vulgar language, I have to. The pain that aches is like a fucking whore who won't leave your house after you paid her. The bitch continues to stay there and make herself at home. Well this regret and fault is eating at the insides of my heart, making it bleed and burn. I sighed and looked to my right, Lizzy sat next to me. Twirling her thumbs as she looked down at her hands. "You can go home." I murmured. "I'll just sit here in the living room and do nothing." I added, looking at my grown sister. Lizzy turned her head, her emerald eyes were holding many emotions, too many to count. I saw anger, sorrow and more boldly.. Pity. Pity for her sadistic older brother. "Elijah." Lizzy said, using my full name. I scoffed. "Your not mom. Nothing gives you the right to use my full name." I spat at her. Lizzy rolled her eyes. "Suck it up, Eli and just let me talk." Lizzy demanded. I sighed and crossed my arms over my aching chest. Maybe this will keep the blood inside. The pain and burning. "You have no idea how I feel, how everyone feels. Of course we feel sorry for you and Clare." Lizzy said, I winced at the sound of her name. She was just up the stairs, sitting in a chair that out looked the view of the street. She's been sitting there for the past three days. Sitting. Occasionally Fiona or Alli, even Lizzy would go up there to talk to her. To no avail, she won't talk. "Sorry. I won't use her name." Lizzy quickly apologized. I nodded. "I just.. I hate seeing you so depressed." Lizzy admitted softly. "I'm not depressed. I've never been." I accused. Lizzy sighed, rubbing the bridge of her small nose. "Yes you are. You've been sitting and sleeping on this couch, you barely eat. You'll cooperate when we have your medication, but besides that. Your lifeless, Eli. Just lifeless. At this moment, Clare needs you." Lizzy explained. I chuckled harshly. "She needs me?" I asked loudly. Lizzy opened her mouth to say more, I held a hand up. "If you don't remember clearly, Lizzy. Five days ago, I pushed my wife and son down the stairs. My son died. I killed my son. She doesn't want me up there. Knowing me.. I'd make matters worse. Always have.. Always will.." I trailed off. Lizzy sniffled beside me and I glanced at her watery eyes. "My son never gets to see the world. Never gets to see the sky. Breathe the air. Walk on two legs. Hold a girl's hand. Kiss a girl's lips. He never gets to do any of those things. He's dead. All because of me and my schizophrenia.. I hurt three _very _important people in my life. My son is buried under a grave, he doesn't even have a birthdate on his headstone. He never had a life. My daughter has been avoiding me, she stays in her room all day. I've mentally scared her-Me.. Her own father. My own flesh and blood won't look at me, I'm a fucking monster to her." I ranted, Lizzy was full out bawling her eyes out. A first, Lizzy never cries, she's always headstrong and never sheds a tear. My own pain and misery, changes everything. I continued on with my banter. "My wife… The most important person in my life, the love of my life is going through a deep depression. I pushed her down a flight of stairs. She could've died, Lizzy. If my wife had died.. If Clare died that night. I would've thrown myself off a building to be with her." I admitted in a firm voice. Lizzy shook her head and continued to sob. "Don't say that Eli. Don't." Lizzy pleaded. I shook my head. "It's the fucking truth, Lizzy! You know it! I can barely live with myself now! Everytime I look into a mirror you know what I see?" I shouted. I awaited for Lizzy to say something, but she didn't. "I see a fucking basket case, who hurts his family. A basket case who killed his baby boy. A basket case who has hurt his wife one time too many. A basket case who is too dangerous to be allowed outside a four cornered room. I deserve to be in a insane asylum again." I said, murmuring the last part. Lizzy uncovered her eyes, showing huge blotches of mascara and eyeliner had smudged on her cheek. Lizzy stood up without a word and left the house. I heard her car start up and drive off. Good. My words worked. I didn't need her here at this moment.

Would this work? How does suicide work? Is it a spontaneous thing or planned thing? I guessed mine is more along the lines of planned. Suicide has passed my insane and sane side. Insanity likes to try it spontaneously, especially if Clare is around to see it. It likes to mess with her, make her just as insane as me. Make her feel the pain I feel everyday. Sanity likes to plan it out, the only other time I tried was after Julia's death, I was just too messed up, I was just diagnosed with depression which was really schizophrenia and my girlfriend had been killed. I had overdosed on a bottle of pills, they had to pump my stomach and evaluate me more. Suicide watch was also apart of the plan, if you try to kill yourself and don't succeed, they bother you until you fess up. I didn't want to go through all of that again. It was pure torture, sitting in a circle with other people who didn't succeed with suicide, share there stories of money trouble, chronic depression. Not one brought up voices telling you too. I sighed, opened my eyes, staring at the monster before me. I grabbed the bottle of pills, last time I was too frightened to see what would happen if I took all of them. This time-I want to take them all. See the results. Would anyone find me in time? Would the paramedics come in time to save me? We'll see. I uncapped the bottle and shook out the remainder of pills. Seventeen white pills laid in my torn hand. I closed my eyes and popped the seventeen little pills into my mouth, the bitter taste hitting me. Making a sour face at the taste, wanting to spit out the bitter ibuprofen pills. I stood against my inner wish and swallowed the pills little by little, I didn't want to choke to death. After each little pill was swallowed, I leaned against the wall, feeling my knees start to give out. I slid down the wall and landed with a thump. My vision was slowly blurring, the effects of the pills years ago never did this, it did it slowly. The more you take, the faster the result. I breathed hoarsely, the room was spinning in a blurry pattern. I slowly allowed the heavy eyelids close, hearing the faint heartbeat in my chest. The heart finally giving out after pain. There was a small chain held to my heart, the chain holding my family members, friends. Anyone who was worth staying alive for. I slowly pushed off Dave. Alli. Jenna. Fiona. It was getting harder to push off them. Adam, I felt a tug. I had to keep him. My best friend. I still pushed him off. Bethany. Her huge brown eyes mimicking her awful father's had love in them for "Uncle Eli". I closed my eyes pushing her off. Bentley and Willow. I pushed them off together despite the Daddy pleads. Easier to push them off that way. Lizzy and Mom also got pushed off, Mom holding on, Lizzy too. Shaking them off until they sank into the darkness. Julia. Her face so alike to mine held remorse and sorrow. Her pleads hurt the faint heart, but I pushed her off nonetheless. Clare. As much as I tried to push her off. I couldn't. She wouldn't budge. "Eli." Clare mouthed. It wasn't her voice saying it. "Eli!" Clare mouthed again, more louder. The Eli's continued to ring in my ears as my heart gave out one last heartbeat, the chain still tied to my torn heart, Clare planted firmly on the chain.

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….. I'm literally crying while writing this. It's emotional. The chain thing was Eli's way of trying to rid the idea of leaving his friends. He started off with people it'd be easier to live without. Like Dave or Alli. It progressively got harder with Adam, Bethany, Willow and Bentley. Harder as Lizzy and his mother refused to be thrown off, Eli did so. Julia was easier to push off, not giving much of a fight because Eli's way of thinking is that she doesn't care or love him anymore after the episode he had. Still it hurt to see her pushed off, he loves her. Clare was the only one hard to push, since she won't move. Clare won't leave Eli no matter what, her feet staying planted on the silver chain. Eli could never find the strength to push her off. HOPE that explained some things! && I hope most of you know that there will be a Degrassi Mini for Halloween! It's in four parts, one part having to do with a full moon, another part with Eli freaking out over a dead girlfriend, another with serial killer Riley.. O.o. and one with a mime Fiona and sparkly dead Drew. I've seen the pictures and Eli's a REAL vampire with the fangs and slicked back hair, Clare's all bloody and in her old catholic uniform, Eli's going to bite her neck (KINKY!) XD. Then there's one with Riley wearing a Jason mask, and Drew looking like.. Edward Cullen. I SWEAR TO GOD, that since Drew looks like Taylor Lautner, so we see what Taylor would look like as a Edward.. Not pretty :P. && I'm taking up too much room! I'll try to post a LOT this week (Monday-Thursday) because on FRIDAY, it's my birthday so I'll be out with my best friend watching Paranormal Activity 2, then we'll come back home for cake and watching Degrassi XD. It's neat that it comes out on my bday, BUT if Eclare break up on MY BDAY.. All hell will break loose. && Don't forget too..

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	20. Hard To Handle

WARNING: you'll still cry and bawl like a freaking baby!

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Chapter Twenty: Hard To Handle (Eli's POV)

Death. Whether I was fascinated by it or afraid of it. I was always curious and yearning for death. My mind was built that way, wrapping it's tendons around the idea of death. Mostly that explained the excessive black and the hearse. Death connected to suicide greatly. White lights.. It was a joke. I've never seen a white light on my way to death. It was cold and dark. I couldn't feel a thing, nothing at all. I had no lungs, no heart. No nothing. I had a mind. Great. I was hoping the mind was the one to be left behind, sure keep the insane mind, but leave the poor heart back there. So battered and torn, didn't even resemble a heart that I was born with, a perfect pink heart. The chain attached to the heart held its place to my mind. The others were out of sight, Clare was still planted on the chain, her hands clasped behind her back as she whistled. A habit she picked up on while in a happy mood. Confused, I approached her. I felt a immediate hand on my arm, holding me back. _"Stay.." _The voice slithered. _"Just a few moments and he'll decide your fate. Just a few moments and you'll be the realm of the dead." _I looked at the shadowed figure, its black hand on my arm. I wanted to call him the Grim Reaper, coming to take my fucked up soul and send me to hell. I gulped and looked at the chained heart. I took a foot forward, the hand tightened. _"Are you possibly choosing your messed up life over a afterlife with no pain? Are you that thick?" _The shadow hushed. I glanced at the shadow under my lashes. "It isn't my time yet." I said boldly. _"Ah.. But it could be.. If you just follow me.. The Lord will decide on your fate.. Just follo-" _The sentence was cut off by numerous voices. I looked around, I saw the heart still connected to the chain, but the chain was being yanked on. Being pulled away. "No!" I gasped and chased after it. It had Clare. _"Don't!" _The voice seethed, I ignored the shadow and chased after the heart, although not for long, because as soon as I grabbed onto the chain. I found myself falling.

Beeping. Warmness. Warm touches. Murmurs. Many of those entered my mind. "Is he alright?" A concerned voice asked, Lizzy. "You're his sister?" A deep voice asked. "Yes. Elizabeth Goldsworthy." Lizzy said formally, a edge of panic on her voice. "Is my brother alright?" Lizzy asked. "We'll await on that. We managed to pump his stomach and get the ibuprofen out of his system. I'm taking this as a suicide attempt?" Most likely the doctor asked. "I suppose so. Eli's been through a lot. He just recently lost his son through a miscarriage." Lizzy explained. Just blab all my secrets to everyone, Lizzy. "Ah. I see. I see on his record that he was just here six days ago for his.. Schizophrenia?" The doctor asked alarmed. "Eli has schizophrenia. He's just like everybody else though. Just with a.. different wired mind." Lizzy explained, taking a while to find a word to explain my fucked up mind. Why'd she choose different? That was so.. Disrespectful. I'd choose, crazy, mental, insane, messed up, fucked up. There's so much more, but I'd be here forever choosing them all. "Maybe I should get the straps.. Says he can get pretty out of control when in an episode. Likes to bite is also scrawled here." The doctor asked lowly. Lizzy sighed. "Don't use any straps. The schizophrenia didn't cause his… suicide attempt." Lizzy gasped. "We'll see." The doctor said unusually. "I'll be having a nurse check on him every hour. See if he's alright. I'll just need either his mother or a wife. Possibly you so I can speak of the treatment Elijah will receive." The doctor informed. "Treatment? Eli needs treatment? What sort of treatment.." Lizzy asked, her voice trailing off on treatment. There was a thick silence. Lizzy gasped. "No.. No! You can't send him back to that God awful place! Please doctor. Don't make Eli suffer." Lizzy pleaded. I tried not to imagine my little sister's face. Her big emerald eyes glistening with tears, her long blond hair sweeping around her face, her hands over her face as she sobbed. As much as I hated pain, I wished that I could take her pain and make it my own. I didn't want her to suffer as much as I did, Lizzy didn't deserve this. She's such a sweetheart and I just don't say that because she's my baby sister. No, I'm saying that because it's the truth. Lizzy didn't deserve the fate of having to worry over her older brother when she has her own life, doesn't matter what I say, Lizzy will never leave. "We should discuss this elsewhere, Elizabeth. I see Elijah has a visitor." The doctor hushed. "Clare?" Lizzy asked confused. "I thought you stayed at your house." Lizzy said. "No.. Everyone here's. I just want to see him." Clare said softly. I could imagine her now. Her reddish brown hair in a beautiful mess around her baby face. Her blue eyes red from the sobbing. She's probably pulling her sleeves down around her hands in a nervous way. "Are you his wife?" The doctor clarified. "Yes.. I'm Clare." Clare said awkwardly. "Ah.. I'm very sorry for you and your husband's loss. Truly sad." The doctor said professionally. The bastard probably doesn't feel bad, he goes through this daily. Clare softly hummed. "Ah.. I'll be in my office with Elizabeth. Do you feel like joining us, Clare?" The doctor asked. "No.. I'll join later. I need to see Eli." Clare said. "Alright. Elizabeth.. This way. My office is at the end of the hall." I felt a swift kiss from Lizzy's lips on my forehead before she bustled from the room with the doctor. Silence was among me and Clare. Should I open my eyes? Let her know I'm alive. "Quit the act, Eli. It's just us." Clare sneered. My eyes flew open as I saw her haggard look by my bedside. Her face scrunched up in anger. I continued to stare at her beautiful haggard figure from my cot, Clare approached me. I was ready for the tears and the soft murmurs of I Love You's. Instead I felt a cold hard slap across my face. Clare huffed after the slap and held her red hand in the other, gently rubbing it. "I deserve that." I croaked. "You deserve much worse, Elijah Goldsworthy. You deserve a million slaps from my palm, you deserve to hear my wrath and you deserve.." Clare didn't finish as she burst into sobs. A spontaneous thing that's been happening to her since the miscarriage. Her hormones were more out of control than a thirteen year old checking out his thirty year old teacher's breasts. "Clare-" I was cut off by her groan. "No! Don't try the whole 'Come here and let me cradle you until you kiss me' trap! I'm sick of that crap, Eli! It always ends that way! Always!" Clare exclaimed through thick tears. "I swear Eli! I can't believe how _selfish _you are! You just decided to take your own life! You know we have children! How would I break it to them that their father was dead? Hmm? How would I?" Clare shouted. I stared slack jawed at Clare. I was about to say a word, when Clare's wrath continued. "Remember what I said last time about the next time you attempt to commit suicide? I said that I'd never forgive you." Clare verified. "That's exactly what I'm doing. I'm not going to forgive you." Clare admitted. "Clare.. Please-" Clare scoffed. "Don't try to plead with me Eli. Makes you pathetic." Clare said. Silence overtook us all. "What happens now?" I whispered into the cool air. Clare breathed slowly. "I heard Lizzy and the doctor talking about the insane asylum." Clare merely said. I gasped. "Don't tell me your siding with that doctor!" I said exasperated. Clare nodded. "Eli.. A lot has happened. This is what you need." Clare explained. "You'll be a better man." "But I am a good man." I gasped. Clare looked away, tears in her eyes. "Please.. Clare we can get through losing Munro, we can get through how I hurt you. We can get through it all, but I need you Clare. I need you to help me get through this all." I said firmly, tears threatening to fall down my cheeks. Clare shook her head. "I can't. I can't do _this._" Clare motioned between me and her. "I can't do us anymore." I stared at her blue eyes. "Then are we divorcing?" I asked. Clare nodded her head. The chain to my heart has broken off, Clare falling into a pit of darkness. I had no life. "I'll tell the kids the truth. They need to know why their parents are divorcing and why their father's in a insane asylum." Clare said exasperated. Her voice was choked up with tears. "I'm sorry Eli. Really.. I am. Times like these make me wish that you never transferred to Degrassi. Makes me wish that maybe I'd be with another man who would treat me better than you." Clare said rather harshly. Clare spun on a heel and walked down the hall. I sat there. Motionless. Emotionless. Lifeless.

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….. I'M CRYING! I KNOW I SINNED! "Thou shall not break up Eclare!" BUT I DID! && I feel extremely bad! I have figured out the remaining number of chapters, 41. So we have 21 more chapters to go. Many of those chapters will be sad and unhappy while others will be happy :D. Maybe I'll post two more chapters. One tonight (maybe…) one tomorrow and none on my birthday. Maybe one on my birthday in the morning before school :D. I'm expecting roses or flowers from a friend :D. Amayzing! Yes in the words of Munro. && Don't forget too..

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	21. Truth

WARNING: the truth will be revealed! Lots of yelling (from Julia) bitching, fighting, just that life for the Goldsworthy's suck because crap happens and well no one can stop it… blahblah..

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Chapter Twenty-One: Truth (Julia's POV)

A sit down is something no one ever wants to hear. A family sit down is way worse. I didn't want to go downstairs to join Willow, Bentley and Mom. I had questions, like where Dad is. Why isn't he here.. With us? Why did Dad try to commit suicide? I wasn't stupid, like most people think. Just because I'm a teenager. I understand what Aunt Lizzy found. I know she found Dad there.. Overdosed on ibuprofen. At least Adam and Fiona told me the truth in the waiting room about his suicide. Adam lost it, he was bawling like Dad had died. Then it had hit me.. Had he died? Is that why he wasn't here with us now? Did Mom want us all together when she told us he died? I felt the hole in my heart burn. Despite that Dad had a fit and pushed Mom down the stairs. Despite that he was the reason Munro died… I love him. I would not know what to do-How to live without him. "Julia! Please come down here and join your brother and sister. I have something to tell you three!" Mom shouted from downstairs. Her voice sounded shaky. Like she was on the verge of a breakdown. I gulped and rose from my windowsill seating and took slow steps from my room and to the dining room. I could feel myself trembling, shaking. He was dead. He must be. The suicide attempt probably worked and Adam and Fiona lied to me. Bentley looked behind his seat and smiled. When I didn't return the smile, his fell. I dragged my feet across the wooden floors and took the seat between Willow and Bentley. Mom sat directly across from me. There was silence as Mom probably tried to find her words. "He's dead isn't he?" I asked loudly. Mom's head shot up. "Who? Your father?" Mom asked. Bentley gasped. "Daddy's dead!" "What's going on?" Willow asked concerned. I was the only one who remained calm. I had to remain calm and strong. I am the oldest sibling. "Did the suicide attempt work, Mom? Was it successful? Is he gone?" I asked louder. I heard Bentley sniffle beside me and glanced to see that he was crying. A tear falling from his pale blue eyes. "D-Daddy can't be d-dead." Bentley choked out. "H-He said he'd l-lived three h-hundred t-thousand years!" Bentley exclaimed through sniffles and gasps for air. "Your father isn't dead." Mom said firmly, a hand flying down on the table. We all fell silent. "Let me talk." Mom added. Her blue eyes were holding anger and frustration. Yet, there was more behind her blue eyes. She was scared. "Okay.. So since your father isn't here, he won't be here for a while." Mom informed us. "Why?" Willow chirped before me. "Your father tried to kill himself." Mom said. "I know that. Adam and Fiona told me." I said, arms crossed across my chest. "Of course." Mom mumbled. "What's suicide?" Bentley asked, his slightly red blue eyes full of curiosity. "Daddy was trying to be with God. So he tried to injure himself to where, God could take him. But since God wasn't ready to take Daddy, he let Daddy live." Mom said in her motherly voice that made me want to vomit. Of course she'd have to dumb it down for Bentley who was the younger one. "Oh.. So Daddy's okay now?" Bentley asked. "Somewhat." Mom said. "What else?" I scowled. Mom shot me a angry look. "Your father.. He's never been well. You've heard his fits during the night. They wake you up and we just tell you to try to go back to sleep. Not to bother." We all nodded. We've been affected by all since we could walk. "Your father's brain is deferent then yours. He has what is called.. Schizophrenia." Mom admitted. My heart stopped. We learned of mental disabilities in health in our freshmen year. Schizophrenia is a serious disease that your born with, that can be triggered with trauma. So that was what Dad had.. He was schizophrenic. Bentley was ready to ask what that was, but Mom beat him to it. "It's a mind disease. You hear and see things that aren't real. Your mind plays tricks on you. Your father's had it since he was fifteen. It was triggered when his girlfriend was killed by a drunk driver while she was riding her bike." Mom explained. I felt automatic guilt for Dad. Having to lose a girlfriend, he must have went insane. "What was her name?" Bentley chirped. Mom cleared her throat. "Julia." Mom said softly. Willow and Bentley had their eyes on me. Mom looked down at the table, picking at her nails. I furrowed my brows. "Dad named me after a dead _ex girlfriend._" I gasped. Mom nodded. "Your father believed that Julia needed some recognition since she meant so much to your father. Being his first love and all." Mom explained with a small smile. "So I'm just here to be remembered of a dead girlfriend of Dad's?" I sneered. Mom widen her blue eyes. "Julia.. Please. Don't make a scene. We'll speak of that later. There is more to discuss." Mom ordered in a firm voice. I leaned back and sighed. "Fine." I mumbled. Mom nodded. "Your father had an episode the night I fell down the stairs. In order to help your father get through the episode, he needs a injection in his neck. Your father was so angry, he pushed me down the stairs. Thus.. The baby died." Mom's voice getting weaker. "Daddy killed the baby?" Bentley asked. Mom sighed. "He didn't mean too. It was an accident. Daddy didn't mean too." Mom comforted a scared Bentley. Bentley nodded. "The doctors think that your father needs to go to a mental asylum. He's been to one before. Actually twice. Once after Julia's death, another when he had a awful episode at Degrassi. I witnessed it all. It was like he was in his own little world. He could only see what insanity wanted him to see." Mom said, drifting into her own world talking of it. "So Dad's leaving?" Willow asked. Mom nodded. "For how long?" I quipped. "I don't know. Until they feel its safe for him to be allowed outside the asylum." Mom informed us with a shrug. "Are we done. I want to go to sleep." I sneered. I was beyond pissed. I was trying to keep the anger inside of me. I was angry that Mom and Dad chose _now _to inform us of Dad's issue. It wasn't fair. All those times. All those fits. Mom's seven-now eight scars on her body had a story I wanted to know. Dad's long red scar, a story Mom would tell me when I'm alone. Mom wouldn't want to scare Willow and Bentley. "No. Stay Julia. I haven't talked about the worst part." Mom breathed. I felt my heart freeze. What else could there be? I thought the worst was that Dad would be in a mental asylum and be out in a couple years at the most. I nodded and leaned forward. "Tell us." I whispered. "I'm divorcing your father." Mom whispered loud enough for us to hear. I froze. Bentley began to cry next to me, I heard him run from us and up the stairs. Mom shouted at him, but it sounded faint to me. Willow also spat some words to Mom, using big words to her face before cursing a word and leaving the room with a humph. "Julia?" Mom said hushed. I looked up at her. "You're a bitch." I scowled. Mom leaned away. "Excuse me?" Mom gasped. "You heard me. Dad is going through hell. I _know _there is more to your and Dad's story I want to hear from you. So much shit you two go through and still you decide to leave him!" I sneered loudly. "Listen-" Mom began, I waved her off. "No! You hear me! Dad's in a mental asylum! He's probably seeing things that no one's ever seen! He just found out his wife is divorcing him! Leaving him! Your suppose to be there for better or for fucking worse! Your such a shitty support system!" I yelled at her. Mom started breaking down in tears. "I'm sorry!" Mom gasped. "I have too!" Mom whispered. "No.. You don't. That's where your wrong!" I sneered. I glared at her trembling figure before grabbing Morty's car keys and escaping. Escaping from Mom. From Dad. From the burden of being a Goldsworthy. No one should deserve this. It's a sentence to hell. A sentence to life that never has good in it.

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The truth has been revealed! I know I had to reveal it! && I did! All three kids took it there own way and I realize that they all don't know the whole story. Eventually they will! But Julia's little escaping will be captured soon! + more! && Don't forget..

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	22. Nothing

WARNING: extreme cursing done by Julia Goldsworthy, TeddyxJulia moments, kissing and eventual sex :D && MY BIRTHDAY!

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Chapter Twenty-Two: Nothing (Teddy's POV)

A black night. The air was unusually thick. In the air, it was different. I could taste it in my swollen mouth. I take my usual routine down the alley way to the park after a beating from Dad. This time, it was me defending Mom. She was just a plain mess. One more punch could land her in a hospital bed.. Or worse. I snuck out and walked here, Gilbert Park. I leaned against the same Oak tree I remember spending my summer days with Julia and Yvonne. _Julia. _The sound of her mere name makes my heart leap. The way her brown hair swirls around her face during the windy days. The way her emerald eyes shimmer in the bright sunlight, not like she'll be out in the sun. A vampire that one is. Just Julia Goldsworthy in general brings me happiness in any sorrow situation. I care deeply for her. The frightened call from Yvonne, her panicked voice about Julia and her parents. Never had I heard Yvonne be any more concerned over her best friend-ex best friend I should say. Never had I ran to my truck so fast to come to the local hospital. To see Julia alive. To see her alive and not hurt. I was relieved. Her pretty face scrunching into sobs as she buried her face into my chest, too ashamed to show her sobbing face. I held her that night as she continued to sob in my lap. Eventually Yvonne walked over to us, hesitant.

"_What?" I said harshly. I shouldn't have been that harsh. Thanks to her concerned mind, she had the right mind to inform me about what had happened with Julia. A story that was still unfamiliar to me. Yvonne sighed and slithered back a step. Obvious to know she knew she didn't belong. "Sorry." I murmured. "I was too snippy back there." I apologized, looking into her big grey eyes. Julia stirred in my lap. Her body relaxed as she was in a peaceful slumber. "It's okay." Yvonne mumbled soft enough for me to hear. There was silence between us, the only sound was Julia and Yvonne's families discussing what had happened. What to do. A frightening thing for adults when you think of it. They're usually so brave and bold, then when tragedy strikes, they want to hide. Be that little kid who's inside of them. I could see it clear on Yvonne's parents. Her father and mother held each other, crying silently. Each wishing they were younger and didn't have big problems like this. Just to be a kid and be too young to understand. They'd give anything to be that. "Why'd you come over here, Yvonne?" I murmured, shifting Julia's body on me. Yvonne gulped. "You do know what happened.. Right?" Yvonne asked. I shook my head. "All I know is that her mom fell down the stairs. Am I right?" I asked. Yvonne nodded and sat next to me. "You just need to know what I just found out." Yvonne murmured. "Is she asleep?" Yvonne asked as she motioned to the sleeping Julia in my arms. I nodded. "Is it bad?" I whispered. Yvonne bit her lip and nodded. "You just can't tell her anything.. Promise Teddy? Her parents will need to tell her." Yvonne advised. I sighed and looked at Yvonne's tired face. "Of course I won't tell her.. Now what happened?" _

I spent the rest of the night there, cradling Julia in my lap while Yvonne explained what had happened. The disease her father has. How he had gone insane and pushed his wife-Julia's mother down the stairs. Instantly killing their unborn son. How her mother has sunken into a depression. Julia has been missing from school for the past week. Yvonne confided that Julia was taking a trauma leave, having to deal with the stress of her family. Still.. I missed he terribly. More than I should. I couldn't help myself or these damn feelings. They had their own mind, for the past months they've been as annoying as Lilith, telling me to talk to Julia. Kiss Julia. Have sex with Julia. Marry Julia. Anything the heart could come up with to make me happy. I pushed those feelings down, telling them to shut up. I needed time to figure my feelings out. Yet, months later. I'm still figuring them out. "Fucking Mom! Just thinks she can fucking decide what happens to this family!" A angry voice called out. I heard a trashcan being knocked over. I furrowed my brows and squinted my eyes to see the figure. "Fucking schizophrenia. Ruins everything!" The familiar angry voice shouted. I knew that angry voice. That same angry voice screeched at me in the hallways when I grabbed onto her a bit too tight. It was Julia. "Julia!" I shouted. I stood up and watched as the figure stumbled to me. It was Julia. Except her hair was in a messy ponytail, she was wearing pajamas, she was wearing bootie slippers and she wore no heavy makeup at all. She looked beautiful. "Teddy? What are you doing here?" Julia asked loudly as she approached me, her face was red with anger. I gulped, hoping to hide the swollen lip. Julia came closer into view. "What happened?" Julia asked alarmed. Her calloused fingertips grazing on my swollen bottom lip. I didn't wince or fidget at her cold touch. I loved her fingertips on my lips. I wanted to kiss them, as weird as that sounded. I wanted to kiss her fingertips and trail the kisses to her shoulder. "It was Lilith. She was angry at me. Her fist slipped and nailed me in the mouth." I lied smoothly. Sure Julia saw that my father could be angry. He showed that he could be abusive. Julia didn't know the whole story. Yet, it seemed unfair. I knew hers. Why couldn't she know mine. "Damn. Your sister can sure throw a punch." Julia scoffed. I chuckled. "Yeah. For a thirteen year old she can put up a fight." I semi lied. Sure Lilith didn't hurt me, it was KC. Still, Lilith can fight. I know her well. "What's wrong, Jules?" I murmured. Julia sighed. "It's a long story. Are you ready for it?" Julia questioned, looking up at me with firm emerald eyes. I nodded. "I'm ready for anything you throw at me, Jules."

"Divorce?" I breathed. Unable to believe that her mother could divorce her father after what had happened between them. I thought for sure she'd be there for him. It's a sensible thing that's just true. I leaned against the interior of Morty. Julia next to me. Both of us in the back of Morty, while Julia explained her story that had happened. "It's so unfair. As much as teenagers say that. I _mean _it." Julia admitted in a choked voice. I felt sorry for her. As much as my lifestyle sucked. I never met a person who's lifestyle was more torn up than my own. Not realizing what had came over me, I placed two fingers under her chin and made her face me. Julia's eyes were vulnerable. Her face was sad.. Sorrowful. The poor girl. She was torn up from the inside out. "Teddy." Julia murmured softly. I brought my face closer to hers, Julia hesitated, but lifted her face to reveal her plump pink lips. I felt our lips collide. Her lips were smooth and soft against my chapped ones. I felt her mouth move against mine in a way me and Yvonne had never kissed. My hand slipped up into her shirt, I felt her bra hooks and undid them. Julia didn't protest as she proceeded to remove her shirt, a firm hand on my belt. Julia wanted what I wanted. We were to get what we wanted, because when we usually want something.. We get in return is.. Nothing.

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Dumdumdum! I know this chapter isn't that exciting, but it shows Teddy and Julia FINALLY kissing and doing more.. Does this mean they're an item? You'll have to wait and see tomorrow! I know, ITS MY BIRTHDAY TODAY! Woo! I'm still a teenager, but I'm not saying my age! I'll be pretty busy, probably only logged on to see if I have any new reviews or any updated favored stories are up! I'll be out seeing Paranormal Activity 2 with my best friend, we wanted to see Jackass 3D, but mother said "YOUR TOO YOUNG TO SEE ANY OF THAT SICK STUFF!" Yeah.. Like I've never seen the freaking show (sarcasm) So we'll see that, && I'll be missing Love Lockdown part 2, so I'll be back to watch that and get back on the computer. :D. My day's booked. BUT! Just remember if Eclare breakup.. All hell will break loose, + my best friend will hear my wrath! && Don't forget too..

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	23. Mistake

WARNING: Clare acts like a bitch && Alli tells the truth! && swearing

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Chapter Twenty-Three: Mistake (Clare's POV)

_Two Weeks Later:_

It's been a two long hard weeks. I've been trying to get use to our new schedule. Of course things around the house have been different since my announcement. Bentley's been the same, just not as happy. Many of times he's asked for Eli. Each time a new notch goes into my heart. Gnawing at its raw skin. Bentley misses Eli so much, a couple of days ago I caught him holding a picture of him and Eli that was sitting on Eli's dresser in our-my room. _"I want my Daddy back, Mommy. I want him more than I want Christmas presents, and you know I love Christmas presents." _Bentley had told me while staring at the picture. Eli's eyes, so happy. Full of glee. Bentley was sitting in his lap with a huge grin on his face. A beautiful picture. A candid shot I took when Bentley was barely three. Then there's Willow. Willow's been non-talkative to me lately. She'll say something's if I ask a simple question, other than that she doesn't speak to me. Willow absolutely hates me for taking Eli away from her. She'll be an isolated girl who spends her free time at Alli's house, hanging out with Ian and Zachary. Mostly Ian, which would worry Eli that Willow was with a boy.. But Eli isn't here. Then there's Julia. The basic worse of all. No talking. No smiles. The night I told her about the situation, she had left the house. Julia came home in the morning to hear my wrath about her being gone.

"_Julia Anne Goldsworthy!" I shouted loudly in a shrill voice. Julia looked up at me from her messy hair, her eye makeup was smudged and her face was flushed. Heated. "What?" Julia muttered, hanging Morty's car keys on the hook. "You've been gone for two hours! Where have you been?" I exclaimed. Julia shrugged. "Out with Teddy." Julia said truthfully. I gasped. "You were out late.. With a boy!" I gasped. Julia nodded. "Yep." Julia popped the 'p' at the end. "I cannot believe your acting this way." I breathed, my heart racing. My seventeen year old daughter was out with Teddy Guthrie.. A legal eighteen year old. God knows what those two did. "Mom. I'm going to be eighteen in a year, I'll be graduating and out of this hellhole. Probably off to better things than being here with you." Julia sneered my name at the end, she began to climb the death stairs. "Don't turn your back on me young lady! I'm your mother!" I shouted, edging closer to the stairs. Julia turned around on the second step from the top, a glare in her emeralds. "You are no longer a mother to me." Julia said lowly, I felt a break in my already broken heart. Julia scowled before reaching the top and going into her room, slamming the door shut. I sighed, choking almost. No longer a mother to her? What was that suppose to mean? I can no longer mother her? I can't stop doing that.. She's my daughter. My flesh and blood. I can't be working out this way. No.. It can't. _

Since then Julia hasn't glanced my way, keeping her head down, and leaving for school. I haven't heard Morty's roar of his engine, so Julia wasn't out to see Teddy. More trouble. I know she had sex with him. I just know it, recently, I've been seeing her turning her purity ring. Almost as if she doesn't deserve to have it on her finger. My daughter was no longer pure. Although… Who am I to talk? I had sex with Eli when I was eighteen, he was nineteen and Eli had already had sex when he was fifteen. _Eli. Eli. Eli. _The name repeating itself in my scared brain. I didn't want the name, the memories, that beautiful face in my mind. I wanted it gone. Not that easy, the mind is a tricky little monster, eating at me. Eating at Eli. Eating at Julia. The mind.. It's scary. Just then Julia walked into kitchen, her head down as she opened the refrigerator and shuffled around for some food. "I can make some eggs?" I suggested. Julia didn't respond, she closed the refrigerator and opened the cupboards. "I'll be having brunch with Alli. Can you watch Will and Bent?" I asked Julia, grabbing my car keys. Julia merely nodded before taking a donut from a bag and walking away. No looking back as she climbed the stairs and into her room. Where she'd stay until the following morning.

There was silence between me and Alli. We sat at a back table at the Dot, which was crawling with teenagers. I looked down at my full cup of coffee, avoiding eye contact with Alli. I haven't spoken to Alli-I haven't really spoken to anyone since Eli's.. cry of help. Alli cleared her throat, I looked up to see her adjusting her watch on her wrist. "How's the kids?" Alli asked, taking a sip of her coffee. I shrugged. "Bentley is the only one who's been talking to me, then Willow's just been a bit isolated and will only talk to me if I ask a direct question and Julia.." I trailed off. Alli raised a arched brow. "What about Jules?" Alli asked. "She's been avoiding me since the incident with her father.. She's been locked in her room. I think she's seeing Teddy Guthrie." I murmured lowly. Alli choked a bit on her coffee. "Julia is seeing Teddy?" Alli asked loudly. Some teenagers looked at us. "Shh Alli." I hushed. Alli nodded. "I don't know. A couple weeks ago after breaking the news of me and Eli's divorce, Julia ran of-" I was cut off by Alli's loud gasp. "Divorce?" Alli exclaimed. My blue eyes widen. I forgot that no one knew of me and Eli's divorce. "Your divorcing Eli?" Alli said again, much more loudly. More teenagers were looking our way. I grabbed my purse and launched on Alli's arm, she scrambled for her purse and a last drink of her coffee before I dragged her from the Dot. "I cannot believe what I'm hearing!" Alli exclaimed again, throwing her hands in the air. I groaned. "It's true Alli. I'm divorcing Eli." I murmured lowly. Alli approached me, seriously. "That's the most awful thing I've ever heard you do." Alli said harshly. I felt a sting. "Alli.. You-" Alli scoffed. "Don't try to make me feel like I don't understand when you don't either!" Alli shouted. I stayed silent. "I've never seen you do such a horrible thing. This surpasses you getting back with KC, or having a fit over Julia not liking you. I don't really blame the girl." Alli mumbled. I gasped. "Your suppose to be my best friend Alli! Your suppose to tell me that I'm right in divorcing Eli!" I exclaimed, feeling a bit of anger boil in my veins. "Being your best friend, Clare, I have to tell you that divorcing Eli-the man you love no matter if he's insane or sane is a horrible idea. Eli.. He needs you Clare.. Just like you need him." Alli said firmly, a hand on my arm. I shook her hand away. "Your wrong Alli. Eli has Caroline and Lizzy, plus a medical staff." I pointed out a bit too snobby. Alli sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Caroline and Lizzy isn't a big support team and those doctors treat him like crap! Like he's seriously insane!" Alli exclaimed. "That's because he is! He's always have been! Never has Elijah Goldsworthy been sane!" I yelled. There was dead silence between me and Alli. Alli face puckered in disgust. "Why does Eli love you? What is so special about you that makes him love you? That man, he loves you so much that he'd do anything, _anything _to make you satisfied." Alli said softly. Big tears welling in her brown eyes. I didn't say a word, I couldn't find my tongue to say the words. "Remember how your pregnancy with Julia was hell?" Alli reminded me, I winced and nodded. Carrying Julia was hard, the hardest pregnancy I've endured for months. "Eli was there for you, Clare. When you were throwing up all day, who was there pulling your hair back? Eli. When you had cramps in your legs, who carried you up the stairs? Eli. When you bitching about your whole body aching, who was there to endure that bitchiness? Eli. Eli has always been there for you, why can't you for once be there for him?" Alli whispered. The tear which had welled up was glazing over her dark skin. I bit the side of my mouth to stop the tears from flowing. "Eli did not have to put up with your crap, Clare. But he did. He did because he loves you so damn much." Alli whispered painfully. I let out a choked gasp. "He killed my baby." I whispered in a choked voice. Alli shook her head. "Eli didn't. Insanity killed Munro. When you realize that.. Call me. Maybe we'll be able to get Eli out of the insane asylum. Until then.. We have no business talking. Sorry Clare." Alli sobbed, the tears overflowing on her dark skin. Alli spun on her heel and walked briskly to her black car, unlocking the door and driving away. I stood there, arms across my chest. A tear lining my eyelid. Wanting to fall to the concrete ground I was standing on.. But didn't. The tear wasn't ready.

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Not a big chapter, but is pretty significant! More too come! && my birthday was amazing! At school my friends gave me balloons, singing cards, cards, a big stuffed Tiger (I named him Gerald) && a yellow duck (I named him Harold) Then me and best friend went to see Paranormal Activity 2 which was better than the first! Had scary parts! There was a preview to a new movie named "Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark" It was completely freaking scary! There was nothing on the screen, pitch black. This voice says _"your sitting there.. In the dark.. But don't be afraid.. don't' be afraid of the dark.." _I looked at my best friend and whispered "Who is speaking to me?" Then the clip pops up with a little girl who has a flashlight is crawling under the covers and a demon face pops up I scream "OH SHIT!" Im effing scared for life. && Then we came home and watched Love Lockdown 2! I hated Clare in this part :P. I just loved the line "Eli's an atheist." LMAO! Then when Eli's like "I'm the one who got burned." I thought of the Rhianna song that's like "Just gonna stand there and watch me burn.." I had a fit of giggles over that! Then we watched The Haunting In Connecticut, the ghost Jonah.. He was yummy :D. BUT! I got for my birthday, Degrassi Season 7! The Vampire Diaries Season1, Kingdom Hearts 2, Selena Gomez & The Scene: A Year Without Rain, 3OH!3: Streets Of Gold, Camp Rock 2 Final Jam Soundtrack, Edward & Bella ornament, silly bandz! Perfume, LOTS of money (245!) && my friend carved me a piece sign from wood and painted it red && he gave me a batman silly bandz! && So far I've bought a 50 dollar iTunes card, Pretty Little Liars (book 1) && Sweet Little Lies by Lauren Conrad. Pretty good book for a flakey chick :D. && Anyway! I will post tomorrow! IS ANYONE PUMPED FOR THIS FRIDAY'S EPISODE? I saw Eli's parents.. O.o.. I seriously thought his parents were the Addams family! -.- XD. But they look like hobos :P. & Don't forget too…

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	24. Doubled

WARNING: you'll be forever scared… I AM!

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Chapter Twenty-Four: Doubled (Teddy's POV)

Tears poured profusely down my cheeks. I felt the salty tears sting my lip. My swollen and bloody lip. I winced in the back of my choked throat. The pain was bearable to a point. I gently risen a most likely broken wrist, I probed my stomach, feeling the immediate pain. I cursed under my breath. I cautiously looked at my reflection, like any other time after a beating. I force myself to look at my damaged body, to decide and determine what could be covered, what should be iced or bandaged. My bottom lip was swollen more than usual after a punch, I could taste the fresh blood in my mouth. Like metal. My right eye was turning purplish blue. Clearly a black eye will be prominent on my face tomorrow. I gently touched my neck, I could see the small handprints. _Her _handprints on my neck. How could someone so close to me-try to strangle to me. She knew that KC was hurting me.. She had to add to it. What will Julia say? What will she say upon seeing the bruises under my clothes and on my face? The strangle marks were the ones I didn't know _how _to hide. There was turtlenecks.. But who wears those. No one. The black eye, swollen lip. I can easily say I bruise easily from playing football with friends. Truth is.. Do I have friends? There is Vince.. But he's not that great of a friend, more of a guy to talk to class from class. Someone to sit with at lunch so I won't look like a loner. Then Julia. She hasn't spoken to me.. Julia she hasn't spoken a word to me since that night. _Our night. _

"_That.. That was.." Julia panted by my side. "Awkward?" I suggested, my breathing too ragged. Julia chuckled harshly. "I suppose so." There was silence between our naked bodies. "That was my first time." Julia whispered, I looked over at her figure. Her cheeks flushed and her eyelids closed, showing black eye shadow heavily on her pale eyelid. Why did she use eye makeup.. Makeup in general. She's beautiful. Just the way she is. "Your not responding.. So I'm guessing that probably made you feel weird." Julia whispered with her eyelids slowly opening, showing tired emerald eyes. I swallowed feeling the burn in my throat from the screaming I did not a hour ago. "It didn't… I'm flattered to be your first." I whispered. Julia scoffed. "Yeah right. Why'd I even do this?" Julia asked aloud. I looked to see her sitting up, showing her bare breasts. "Having a nice look?" Julia snapped at me. I looked away quickly, running a hand through my messy hair. "This was such a mistake. You probably didn't even want to have sex with me. Bet Yvonne was better." Julia mumbled while looking for her bra. I grabbed Julia's arm, Julia looked back at me with angry yet hurt emerald eyes. She really thought I didn't enjoy or want to have sex with her. "I wanted to Jules. I always have. But.. I will not compare my sex with Yvonne with sex with you. That's just wrong." I said firmly. Julia nodded, looking down. "I feel dirty." Julia murmured into thick air. I felt regret in my stomach. Was she even ready? I know I was ready, yet unprepared for sex. Thankfully I have a condom in my wallet, used it for a time like this. "Were you even ready?" I whispered. Julia shrugged. "I don't know." Julia answered. "I just know that I need to get home before my Mom calls the cops." Julia said. I nodded and pulled her bra from my side. "Do you need me to leave for you to get changed?" I asked, trying not to glance at her full breasts. Julia shook her head. "Stay.. If you want too. You've already seen it all." Julia said with a small chuckle while putting her bra on. I nodded and looked away, looking for my own clothes, still feeling regret in my stomach._

The following day, Julia didn't speak a word to me. I figured to give her some time, but since then it's been two weeks since our night. Two weeks and Julia won't even glance at me. There must be a burden on her shoulders, what with her family, her father, and now me. It must feel like ten tons on each shoulder. "Teddy." A voice perked from my doorway. I froze. That voice. That sickly sweet voice that tasted like sweet chocolate. She was here. "Daddy is asleep. That means I can help you." Lilith whispered, her voice edging to seductive. I almost vomited. Lilith took steps closer to me, a bag of ice in her small hand. "Just sit down Teddy. I'll take care of you." Lilith whispered, those big brown eyes were intimidating. Almost as if she could kill me with those eyes. "I said _sit down._" Lilith demanded. I stood frozen. "Don't make me angry Teddy. You know what happens when I'm angry." Lilith sneered. I gulped and turned around. "Where do you want to start?" I squeaked. Absolutely terrified by this fourteen year old. "I'll start with your black eye. Daddy did quite a number on you." Lilith whispered, I lowered onto my bed and Lilith climbed onto my lap, icing the bruised eye. "You-you did that." I said in a choked voice. Lilith hummed. "Guess I did. When that bat's in my hand, I tend to get out of control." Lilith giggled while gently icing the bruised eye, slowly icing the bottom lip. "Where's your girlfriend?" Lilith asked, her voice happy. I gulped. "Julia's not my girlfriend." I growled. Lilith stopped icing and cocked her head to the side. "I didn't know you and Julia were spending time together." Lilith forced through her lips. I froze, feeling regret from the words. Lilith could hurt me.. Or worse.. Julia.

_The pain was breaking through to me. One word could make him angry. So angry that he'd take my wrist and snap it . I felt the snap and heard it as well. Biting my lip to keep from screaming at the pain. "Don't walk from me Theodore!" KC shouted. I stood frozen, wanting so badly to take the bat from the closet which was only across from me. Take the bat and smash his head, make him feel the pain I constantly feel. "Lilith." KC said loudly. "Help Daddy out." KC purred, his voice a sickly velvet. Lilith appeared in front of me from her room, she was before me with the bat in her hand. The bat. "Lilly. Put the bat down Lil." I cooed in a broken voice, wincing at the pain from my wrist. "Why? Daddy told me about how you left me during the night to see Julia." Lilith growled, her voice sneering on Julia's name. "I didn't leave you." I lied. Lilith shook her head. "Liar." Lilith whispered. "You know what we do to liars here, Lilly." KC whispered from behind me. "We hurt them until they scream the truth." KC hissed. Lilith smiled viciously. "Don't worry Teddy. It won't hurt.. That much." The words themselves were lies. The pain struck across my face in blows, by the bat, very small hits. I knew Lilith could strike harder, I could tell she was playing the softie card. "I can't Daddy. I'm too tired." Lilith lied in a small voice. KC scoffed. "Stop with the lies Lilith. If you can't swing a damn bat than do something else with your hands.. Or in my case fists." KC ordered. Lilith nodded, her head striking down at me. Those brown eyes were full of hatred mixed with love. Before I could breathe, Lilith's hands were like vices around my neck, squeezing like a snake around it's prey. "This if for Julia." Lilith whispered in a harsh voice, her hands becoming tighter as my breathing becoming slower._

"So.. Are you?" Lilith asked firmly. I swallowed. If she wanted lies.. Than she'll get lies. Lies feed at the little demon on my lap. "No. I'm not seeing Julia. Why see Julia when I have my little sister." I lied through clenched teeth. Lilith relaxed and smiled. "Good. More time for us, Teddy. It's what I want." Lilith whispered, placing the ice bag down, her hand was caressing my cheek. I immediately felt uncomfortable. "I love you Teddy." Lilith whispered, her lips caressing my cheek now. I felt myself freeze at the touch. I knew what she wanted me to say. "I love you too." I stammered. Lilith drew back and smirked. "I knew you'd come around."

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INCEST? Why yes! Lilith can be portrayed in your way, Teddy as you can see doesn't want what Lilith wants. So no.. their not going to have sex. That's just plain disgusting and I'd probably vomit whiling writing that. Sorry for a late post! I've been out of the writing groove, writers block sucks :P. Tomorrow I have a minimum day && its pajama day! YAY! Maybe I'll post tomorrow? Most likely. Have you guys seen the Degrassi Halloween Mini's? I DID! They're on you tube and they're hilarious! Especially Eli/Clare's, so hot! Then Zane and Riley's were cute, but Fiona.. She was just.. LMAO! ANYWAY! I've already posted Make Believe soundtrack on my page, I'll still make a chapter dedicated to it after the story's caput! ITS LONG! && Don't forget too…

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	25. Visitor

WARNING: sadness and asylums and shannons :D

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Chapter Twenty-Five: Visitor (Julia & Eli's POV)

_Two months later: _

Julia's POV:

"Are you sure you want to go inside Julia?" Adam asked, his voice hesitant. I swallowed and looked at the asylum. There was wire all around the building, wardens walking around. Even some patients were allowed to walk around. I even saw a old woman talking to a oak tree. A common thing me and her. My father was in there. Inside that huge asylum, they had him locked inside a padded room, strapped down, needle ready. I felt my heart fall thinking of that. Thinking of them treating my Dad horribly. He didn't deserve any of this. "Yes. He's my Dad, Adam. Of course I want to see him." I advised Adam. Adam nodded and grabbed my hand before I could leave the car with him. "There will be things in this asylum that will scare you. If you need to close your eyes. Grab onto my arm, I'll lead you to Eli's ward." Adam told me. I nodded. "Does that apply for me too, Dad?" Yvonne perked from the backseat. I jumped, forgetting that Yvonne was accompanying us. "Yvonne Jacqueline. I told you not to even come. Why?" Adam groaned annoyed. Yvonne sighed. "I'm not here to see some freaks running around." Yvonne scoffed. I shot her a dirty look. For all I know that could my own father. "Sorry." Yvonne mumbled. "Didn't mean to offend you." Yvonne said, looking away. Adam rolled his eyes before exiting the car. Yvonne and myself did the same. Each of this taking either side of Adam. "What ward is Eli in, Dad?" Yvonne chirped from beside Adam, looking at her surroundings carefully. Adam cleared his throat. "Schizophrenic ward." Adam murmured softly. I stiffened. "Will he hurt us?" Yvonne asked, her voice on the edge of nervousness. Adam sighed. "I don't know the answer Y. I really don't." Adam admitted. "Eli's tried to attack me before.. When we were younger." Adam revealed to us. I glanced at Adam quickly. "What'd Dad do?" I asked fast. "He was snarling. I remember that. His eyes were glazing over. His face losing every ounce of Eli. His mouth turning into a grimace. His mind was fighting with the insanity. He told me to escape-his sane side did. I didn't want too.. But I didn't want to hurt Fiona if I was injured." Adam whispered quietly. The snarling, the glazed eyes, his grimace. I was familiar with it all. All three were exposed to me that night of horror. A night unspoken of. Silence was between us three as we were led by a warden into the asylum. At first it wasn't bad. Sure people seemed a bit weird, too depressed, rocking in the corner and too much smiling. Then as he climbed floors, it became worse. People with multiple personalities, people screaming, people running around naked. There was a whole floor for the criminally insane as well, but thankfully Dad's floor was before the criminally insane. I was launched onto Adam's hand, as was Yvonne. Both of us were terrified.. And we haven't even hit the schizophrenic ward.

The screams were unbearable. Hurting my eardrums profusely. Thankfully the doors were locked shut. I regret looking to my right to see a man, probably in his twenties, chewing at his leg and banging his head against the wall. A nurse was trying to calm him with a needle. I glanced away quickly. Definitely terrified. "Here is his room." The warden said, stopping in front of Dad's room. I could see his chart, _Elijah Goldsworthy, Age: Thirty-Nine Disorder: Schizophrenia _I shivered at the mere thought of what was in that bulky folder. "Has he been okay?" Adam asked, clear worry on his round face. "Only has had one episode since being here, calmed him down pretty quickly with the needle. Other than that he's been depressed, severely I should say. Stay's in the corner of his room, rocking. He has his group therapy for the suicide attempt three times a week. Doesn't say much." The warden explained. "Has he clawed?" Adam asked in a hushed voice. The warden shook his head. "Surprisingly no. He was about to during his episode a couple weeks ago, but we drugged him quickly and strapped him down." The warden explained. "Listen, I have to go down to another ward. Just call for Shannon here for any assistance." The warden said before scurrying off. "So which one of you will see, Elijah?" Shannon asked, looking at us three. I raised my hand. "I suppose me." I said softly. Shannon nodded. "Are you his daughter?" Shannon asked. I nodded as Shannon unlocked the door. "I see the resemblance." Shannon said with a smile. Shannon than swung the door open, revealing Dad's life.

Eli's POV:

Rock. Back. Forth. Back. Forth. Door opening. Door opening? The doors never open on a Friday. Friday is my day. As is Saturday and Sunday. Those are my days. My days where nurses or wardens don't bother me. Days where I'm a forgotten patient. Invisible. "Elijah. You have visitors." The nurse-Shannon was her name. She was nice. Possibly the nicest here. Such a step up from Rachel when I was younger.. Where is that bitch now? "I do not Shannon." I said boldly. It was the truth. Why would I have visitors? It's absurd. "Yes you do, Elijah. Miss, will you tell him?" Shannon asked whoever was with her politely. "Daddy?" A familiar small voice chirped. I turned my head around to see Julia standing awkwardly by Shannon. "Jules?" I whispered. Tears formed in Julia's eyes, a small smile on her face. Before I knew it Julia had her arms around me, in a tight hug. "I missed you Daddy." Julia whispered, I could feel her tears down my neck. "I missed you too, sweetheart." I whispered, holding her. Julia sat comfortably on my lap, her head dug into my shoulder. We both sat there for what seemed like hours, I rocked her back and forth. A habit of mine. Julia pulled away from our embrace and sat cross legged in front of me, wiping the tears away. "Who'd you come with?" I asked, I knew that.. Her mother wouldn't allow her to come here. If her mother never rarely visited me when I was younger, I highly doubt she'd let our seventeen year old. "Adam and Yvonne. Their in the waiting room." Julia said. "Oh." I said. We sat in silence. "Your not mad at me are you?" I whispered, looking up at my daughter through my bangs. Julia shrugged. "Mom told us all the story. Of you and what you have. How you deal." Julia admitted. I swallowed. I should've known that. Who wouldn't. "Did your Mom tell you everything?" I asked, using emphases on everything. Julia nodded. "Yeah. She even told me how you named me after your dead ex girlfriend." Julia said, her voice a bit harsh. I looked away, glancing at my rough hands. "Sorry Jules. I didn't want you to feel-" "Feel as if I'm just a person used so you could think of your dead ex girlfriend?" Julia interrupted. I nodded. "Your name-It's special. More special than Willow's or Bentley's." I explained. Julia rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Willow's named after a tree and Bentley's named after a car. Here I am named after a dead ex girlfriend." Julia scoffed. "Your name's not just special because of my Julia. It's special because it's your name. It's who you are. Could you imagine yourself as a.. Ava? Or a Isabelle?" I questioned. Julia pondered for a moment and shook her head. "No.. I see myself as Julia Anne Goldsworthy." Julia said proudly. I smiled. Somewhat. "What was your Julia like?" Julia asked, her emerald eyes wonderful. "Julia was amazing, Jules. She had this long black hair, big green eyes. Such a pale complexion, as much as she hated it. I loved it. She always wore a smile on her face-or a smirk. She was sarcastic.. Very witty." I explained, my mind going down memory lane. Julia giggled. "Sounds like me and you combined." Julia observed. "Very much. I guess she was a big influence on how I act, how you act." I said. There was more silence after my last sentence. "Do you still love Mom?" Julia whispered, looking at me with big emerald eyes. Wishing for the right answer. I opened my mouth to answer her when Shannon opened the door. "Sorry. It's dinnertime. You'll have to leave." Shannon said with a small smile. Julia stood up, as did I. "I'll give you two time." Shannon said as she closed the door. I looked at Julia, she wrapped her arms around my neck and kissed my cheek. "I love you Daddy." Julia whispered. "Will you come here again?" I asked, my voice high for anticipation for my daughter arriving here again. Julia shrugged and pulled away. "Depends if Adam can sneak me out again." Julia snickered. I smiled. "I love you too Jules." I responded. Julia smirked before walking out. I sighed, finally answering her question. "Of course I love her."

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AWEE! I'm crying! So much more sadness coming up! Although this is off topic, in my English class, my teacher had us in the middle of the classroom. Standing. Each side was agree and disagree. Since we're about to read Romeo and Juliet, he'll read us themes from the book, if we agree we stand on agree side and the same for disagree. One of the questions were "Is Love Blind?" I stood on agree, after that he ranted on about how love IS blind by looks. I began to think of story (odd) and thought is Eli and Clare's love is blind. There was the way each of them think of each other as beautiful, but do they find each other's personalities beautiful? Does Clare think Eli's ravaged mind is beautiful? What do you think? && Don't forget too..

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	26. Fleeing Love

WARNING: blood! Leaving! && other shit :P

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Chapter Twenty-Six: Fleeing Love (Teddy & Julia's POV)

_A Week Later: _

Teddy's POV:

"How is she gone! How could that bitch leave me!" KC roared through the house. I swallowed. My ear was against my bedroom door, the door locked and secure. "Needs to get away from my abusive side. What the fuck is that suppose to mean?" KC shouted out loud. I closed my eyes. Mom had left, she'd finally left. Mom leaving and taking Lilith with her sounds good to me. Lilith has been touchy and full of love since I told her I wasn't seeing Julia. Although I wish she'd have taken me with her. She just left me here, to endure more of his punches. More of his kicks. More of his drunken nights. I was left alone to endure that alone. All alone. I clutched at the letter in my hand, raising the letter so it could be at my eye level. I re read her handwriting.

_Dear Teddy,_

_I know you must be thinking of how I'm such a horrible mother. A horrible mother who leaves her son behind. The truth is honey, I had to leave you behind. Not because I don't love you. Trust me, I do. I love you with my whole heart, you're my son. But recently Lilith's been telling me how you and her have been spending awful amount of time together, I didn't find that so wrong. It was good for you two to have brother and sister bonding. Then Lilith came to me today, this morning after you left to hang out with Vincent. Lilith told me how you've been holding her to close, how you've been feeling her leg, touching her arm. Teddy, it's making her uncomfortable. It's making her feel unsettling. So I had to get her away from you and your father. With your father's drunken beatings and your inappropriate touching, it's a bad environment for Lilith. I don't want my daughter growing up that way. Teddy, don't grow up to be like KC, honey you could do so much better. Be something better than him. The monster whose been hurting us. Just don't act like this Theodore. Acting like a pedophile to your little sister won't solve any problems you've been having with Julia, Lilith's told me about her and her parents. I know the Goldsworthy family's history Teddy and I'm sure you do too. Don't mess up and start dating that Goldsworthy girl, it's a bad decision. Her father's got a messed up mind, the man can't think clearly, her mother's a depressant and supposedly her little sister's been getting hurt from fights. Bad family, Teddy. You're an adult and a high school graduate. Make a good choice and use the money my brother gave you to go to college. Do this Teddy. If you do and better yourself maybe I'll find you in Toronto and you could live with us. Just better yourself Teddy. Please? I love you._

_Love, _

_Mom _

_PS: Lilith loves you also and she told me to tell you that she's watching you.. Don't be making anything more difficult Teddy. _

Now I'm a pedophile in my Mom's book. Supposedly touching Lilith. As if, I should be the one saying about her inappropriate touching. Her lies get me twisted to a point I wouldn't mind slapping her. It was her last line. The PS. _"Lilith loves you also and she told me to tell you that she's watching you.. Don't be making anything more difficult Teddy." _The last line frightens me to a point where I feel as if a pair of eyes are watching me. Was she watching me at the moment? Would she jump from my closet and attack me? If she does.. Than I'm screwed. "TEDDY! OPEN UP THIS GODDAMN DOOR NOW!" KC bellowed. I swallowed. I didn't say a word as he continued to kick and smash the door, to a point where the door lock broke off, scattered by my feet. I watched as the door eventually was broken down. KC Guthrie stood there, bat in hand. A devilish smile on his face. "Time to play, Teddy." KC purred. A game of ours. He'd play it when I was younger. A game where Daddy got to beat the shit out of you until your asleep. Seems like the game's gotten a higher rating. More advanced. Instead of fists, Daddy's using a bat. Wouldn't be surprised to find a gun in his pocket. "Time to play." I whispered, dropping the letter, Bracing myself for bleeding pain. KC Guthrie's last game to play.

Julia's POV:

"Ask me again why we're driving to Teddy's house?" Yvonne questioned as we drove down the street. Yvonne driving quite fast. "Teddy texted me. He told me that his Mom left and took his little sister with him. He's alone with his dad." I explained to Yvonne. Yvonne's trimmed eyebrows furrowed. "And.. Many Mom's leave a family." Yvonne said. I sighed. "You don't know his father. His father's.. not a well man." I breathed. We drove in silence, eventually pulling up to Teddy's house. I had my hand on the door handle, déjà vu happened when Yvonne's small hand was on mine. "Can I come? I don't want you getting hurt." Yvonne whispered. I sighed and nodded. "But I thought you hated me?" I smirked. Yvonne smiled. "Not that much anymore." Yvonne said. I smirked again and exited the car with Yvonne. Yvonne was by my side, we linked arms. A weird sensation since I Haven't been this close to Yvonne in months. Both of us walked to the front door and were about to knock when the door swung open, both of us glanced at each other scared. Frightened. Something bad had happened. Something very bad. Holding onto Yvonne tightly, we entered the trashed house. I screamed. Yvonne gasped, backing up. On the floor, battered and broken was Teddy's body. Hovering above him was KC. His father. KC held a bloody bat in his hand, a grimace on his face. "This is so much like déjà vu, it was only yesterday I was in the same predicament. Only changes were it was your father in your position and your mother on the floor. Just like Teddy." KC purred with a smirk. I furrowed my brows. "What do you mean?" I gasped. KC snickered. "I used to fuck your mommy and beat your daddy. Seems like I'll do both to their daughter. Such a shame." KC whispered. I backed away, immediately scared. I wanted to scream for Dad. Or Mom. Anyone. Could anyone help me or Yvonne? Although as he drew closer to me, not only did my heart beat faster, but Teddy's grew slower. Yvonne edged more to the door. "Jules." Yvonne whispered. I tried to glance back, but the front door swung open. All froze as the men in uniform came in to take order.

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ANOTHER POST! Yes! I am quite sad to be honest! I found out by the guy who made Degrassi that, after four episodes of this season (Umbrella part 1 and 2, Halo 1 and 2) That will be the fall season finale! Then we wait until FUCKING FEBURARY! YES! FEBURARY! For the rest of the season to air! Then it will air until April, During March the cast will film Season 11 (YAY!) and we'll get a summer like the last one (Monday-Thursday) CAN YOU BELIEVE IT! We'll actually have to get fucking lives now! && I wanted to spend Christmas and Thanksgiving with Eclare! Kissing under the mistletoe and Adam wearing a Rudolph shirt! :D! BUT IM SAD! My life is pointless with just The Vampire Diaries (Thursdays) Dancing With The Stars (Monday & Tuesday) Glee (Tuesday) Hellcats (Wednesdays) Then when American Idol starts up (Tuesday & Wednesdays) BUT WHAT ABOUT FRIDAY! I always anticipate Fridays. What am I suppose to watch? Gigantic? FUCK THAT! && Don't forget too..

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	27. Official

WARNING: craziness, the REST of the truth, clare crying, FIONA!, Fadam love, Teddy and Julia sweet moments && officalness :D

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Chapter Twenty-Seven: Official (Julia's POV)

Crazy to find myself waiting in another waiting room. Crazy to find myself sitting next to my newly best friend who months ago, I slammed her head into a locker. Crazy to find myself worrying over a boy whose been on my mind since the day I met him. Crazy to find myself trying to hold tears back for him. Teddy Guthrie was nothing more than just a friend of Yvonne's, I figured that eventually Teddy and Yvonne would become a couple, happened. Then eventually they'd break up for some stupid reason, not a really stupid reason, but happened nonetheless. Then I'd say au revior to the poor guy and most likely see him at the ten year reunion with three kids behind a white picket fence. Although this came out differently. Never did I imagine myself slowly falling for Teddy as the months progressed. As our relationship stood as friends, to enemies, back to friends to where we are now. Complicated. Does he even remotely like me? He must have, he had sex with me. Then again he had sex with Yvonne, getting her pregnant. Although kissing Teddy was different than me kissing other guys. It meant something. It was more than an awkward kiss or a chanted kiss from friends. It was a real thing. Did I ever expect the boy Yvonne brought to my house that day to have an abusive father? No. He didn't seem like he was a bruised and beaten guy. Then slowly getting into his life, seeing it through my eyes. I saw what happened. In the back of my mind, a part of me knew he was being abused. Part of me knew that all those bruises wasn't a sad fall from the stairs or a punching match with a little sister. It was his father. I could've helped him. All these months. Or should I say year? It's been a year today that I've known Teddy. A year since he walked through my front door and into my life forever. "Jules?" Yvonne whispered by my side. "Huh?" I groaned, I had my eyes closed. My head on my balled fist. "Your Mom's here." Yvonne whispered. I looked up to see Mom rushing from the doors. "Are you alright Julia?" Mom asked flustered. Obviously worried. "I received a call from Fiona telling me that you were there when Teddy was being abused. I got worried. I was worried that KC got to you too." Mom whimpered. Obvious worry in her blue eyes. I raised a brow. "KC? How do you know Teddy's dad?" I asked. Mom swallowed. Fiona than approached us, her black dress was tight to her thighs. Her brown curly hair was flowing. A small smile on her lips. "Tell them Clare. Just do it." Fiona urged. My eyes wandered from Fiona to Mom. "What is Fiona talking about Mom? What do you need to tell me?" I asked, my heart fluttering. How did Mom know KC? Flashbacks entered my mind as I thought of a while ago, when KC had sneered my parents names. Knowing them both. Looks as if the history book didn't end with Dad living unhappily in a insane asylum. Seems like there is more to fill those blank pages. Mom glanced around nervously, not wanting at all to answer my question. "Clare. Yvonne told me about KC mentioning.. The abusement that he did to you in high school." Fiona murmured. My eyes widen. "KC hurt you Mom?" I exclaimed. Mom sighed and took a seat beside me, Fiona retreating back to Adam, who's arms were out to hold her and kiss her. A perfect scenario for the perfect couple. If only mine were like that. "Julia.. When I was in high school, me and your father had been together. Even after I found out of his schizophrenia. I stayed with him. Disaster struck when Bianca De Sousa, teased me about how Eli had touched her. I was distraught. I've felt the feeling of being betrayed by a boyfriend. KC and Jenna." Mom explained. "KC and Jenna were together?" I gasped. Mom nodded. "KC got Jenna pregnant in high school. KC was scared so he left Jenna, eventually Jenna had.. Bethany." Mom explained. I looked back at Yvonne's whose expression mimics mine. "I broke up with Eli. A very bad decision because Eli had a episode when he went home. He came to school the next day and went crazy. Shouting and.. Clawing at his flesh. Causing a commotion. Eli went to the insane asylum and stayed there for a year. During that time, I had grown close to KC and well.. He was there for me. I thought he'd be the same boyfriend I had in my freshman year. I was wrong. KC abused me. Along with the help of Eli's rival, Fitz. Together they'd beat on me for a year." Mom explained, her voice pained. "Oh Mom.." I whispered. "I'm so sorry Clare." Yvonne whispered. Mom closed her eyes. "That's not the worse part though. Eli returned to Degrassi. He caught KC being a bit abusive to me at school, and I ignored Eli. It was quite hard since he was in my English class.. Again." Mom chuckled. I even heard a distant firm chuckle from Adam. A inside joke nonetheless. "Eli overheard KC and Fitz planning to beat on me at 4:00pm. Eli came to find me already beaten, KC wanted to see me behind the Dot. I should've known better, but I couldn't ignore him. He'd only do worse to me. KC and Fitz ran off, Eli and Adam finally realized that KC and Fitz lied, they knew Eli was hiding out in a bathroom stall listening in on their conversation. Making sure for me to meet them earlier. I did and I paid the price. I was in a coma for three months." Mom's voice broke at the end. My chest tightened and I had my hand on Mom's. "Coma?" Yvonne whispered, clearly amazed. "What did dad do?" I asked. "He waited. He waited every damn day I was asleep. One day though, your father brought me justice. Eli and Adam found KC and Fitz hanging out in the Ravine, after punching KC around a couple times, the cops came to arrest KC and Fitz. We never saw them again. Until recently." Mom concluded. A tear rolled down her cheek. "Oh Mom." I crooned, holding her hand in a tighter grasp. "They should've never let that bastard out of prison. Sure Fitz got to stay for life, but KC was let out? I feel so bad for Teddy. The poor boy. He's endured this for his whole life, while I just endured it for a year." Mom choked out. I let out a choked gasp, my attention back to Teddy. Was he alright? Was he in a coma like Mom? Would I be like Dad and wind up waiting for three months? Waiting that long was too much, but not too much for Dad, since he loved Mom. The true question was.. Did I love Teddy?

His hand was heavy and rough in mine. I let out a deep breath and looked up to see Teddy was still asleep. His pale eyelids shut. I couldn't help myself but to gently allow my fingers to graze his purple black eye. He slowly stirred and I removed my hand like a bullet. "Sorry." I muttered from habit. I occupied my attention by looking out the window. A clear night sky, twinkling stars dancing across the black sky. "Why be sorry?" A rough voice murmured. I spun my head to Teddy's body. His eyes were opened, well one was half open. I felt a squeeze on my hand. I smiled. "I made it out alive?" Teddy croaked. I nodded. "Thanks to Yvonne and her speedy texting to 911." I said, making sure I wouldn't take credit. "I'll have to say thank you to her later. If she'll see me." Teddy murmured. "She will. It's Yvonne fucking Torres." I joked. Teddy chuckled, but quickly stopped. "Are you in pain?" I questioned, looking around his battered body. "No.. I just want to know where my father-I mean KC is. Where is he?" Teddy asked in a husky voice. "Prison. They'll be a court hearing to see if he's there for life without parole." I told Teddy. Teddy's brown eyes seemed to light up. "Thank God." Teddy murmured, his eyes glancing around the room. "Why are you here?" Teddy asked, his voice firm. I hesitated. "Uh.. I found you.. At your house. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. If you don't want me here that's okay." I said quickly, pulling myself off the chair. "No.. Stay." Teddy begged, honesty in his eyes. I shrugged and sat down on his bed, our hands intertwined still. The silence between us was like ice. Just frozen. No one could seem to have a word slip off our tongues. "Jules.." Teddy's words broke the silence. No words were said as I bent forward and pressed my lips to his. Feeling the same sensation that night, his hands on my back, pulling my closer. Was this all meant to happen? The fighting, the beating, the lies. Was this all suppose to happen to have me and Teddy be together finally? If it is.. I surely don't mind this past year. My feelings finally becoming clear as our kiss prolonged. I was in love with Teddy Guthrie. A ton of bricks lifted off my chest as the heart danced in my chest.

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Cutesy! Some of you had asked for Julia to know of Eli/Clare's past with KC and I have had this planned! Hell I have this whole story planned out. I can guarantee that the ending won't be pleasant. I keep feeling so much more frightened while we reach the big climax. The big ordeal that changes the characters. You guys will hate me! I will probably post again today! Fourteen more chapters to go! && Don't forget too…

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	28. Runaway

WARNING: not much drama, but shows more into CLARE :D

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Chapter Twenty-Eight: Runaway (Clare's POV)

Three Days Later:

Just a signature. Couldn't be that hard. Just sign your name. Clare Goldsworthy-or soon to be Clare Edwards, once again. I'll go to the court to change my last name. I just need to sign my name under Eli's. I gulped seeing how trembled his writing looked. Not the usual cursive he uses elegantly. Instead his name was hard to even see, his E was shaky and the J looked jagged. I could even see the ink blotches on the paper. I could see him now, the nurses around him as they watched him carefully. Watched him suffer for minutes as he signed Elijah Goldsworthy on the divorce papers I sent. His brows furrowed, his face red as he tried his hardest not to cry or rip the paper. He just wanted to see me happy, pleased. Here I am though, in his shoes trying to sign my own name which is ten times harder because my lawyer Penelope is next to me, once I put the pen down Penelope will take the papers to the office. Make the divorce finalized. Making me no longer a Goldsworthy. My hand trembles as the pen hit's the paper. "Are you sure about this Clare?" Penelope asked, her lips pursed. I nodded. "I have too.. In order to make sure me and Eli are happy. We aren't happy together." I said, my heart clenching. I shakily wrote Clare, the tail of the E curled more than needed. Just to get Penelope off my back, I quickly signed Edwards in sloppy cursive. "Ah.. Thank you Clare. I'll take this to the court and your divorce from Elijah will be finalize by the end of the day." Penelope said with a small smile. I stood up on shaky legs, afraid of my knees giving out. "Pleasure doing business with you Clare. I do hope that things with your family straightens out. Divorces are hard. I've been divorced from my husband for ten years." Penelope said. My eyes widen. "Have you dated others?" I asked. Penelope giggled. "I just can't Clare. I'm just too in love with the asshole still." Penelope admitted. My heart stopped. "Why'd you divorce him then?" I quickly asked. Penelope sighed. "He was too nice to me and I can be such a cold hearted bitch. I couldn't hurt him anymore." Penelope admitted. I sighed looking away. "I do hope you made the right decision Clare. Goodbye." Penelope whispered before whisking away, her heels clicking away until she was out the front door. I held onto the chair for support. Despite that my divorce story was different from Penelope's, it still had some common ground. Penelope still loved this man… but did I still love mine? Will I be like Penelope? Have no life and still dream about this guy I divorced? I didn't want to spend my years like that. I didn't want to live a life without.. "Mom?" Willow asked from the archway. I looked up to see Willow, her curls in a ponytail and she was still in her shorts and tank top from this afternoon when she was hanging out with her best friend Amber Bayar. "Yeah Willow? Do you want dinner?" I asked, making my way to refrigerator. Willow shook her head. "No.. I was wondering why there was that lady in our house." Willow admitted. I looked into Willow's blue eyes, did I have the heart to tell her? "That was Penelope.. Me and your father's lawyer." I whispered. Willow looked away, crossing her arms. "You two are still going through this stupid divorce?" Willow spat, her voice angry. "We did. When Penelope finalizes the papers this evening.. I'll be divorced from your father." I explained to Willow. Willow scoffed. "Just because he's different huh?" Willow exclaimed. "Will.. It isn't because of his disease.. It just isn't working out." I said. Willow shook her head. "As if.. You know damn well that you love Dad and you'd go through hell and back for him." Willow stated. "Don't use that vulgar language Willow Caroline!" I shouted. Willow staggered back. "I hate you.. So much." Willow said, her jaw trembling as she spoke. Willow spun on her heel and climbed the stairs at lightening speed. I didn't bother calling after her. She'd just yell at me and possibly call me a bitch, it seems like everyday Willow is more like her Aunt Darcy more and more. Perhaps she is right.. Maybe I am in denial and is just making stupid choices. As for now.. I have no clue about the path God has made for me.. But whatever it is. I'll take his gratefully.

"Where is she? Have you called the Bayar's?" I said frantically to Julia, who had put the phone down. "Yes Mom. Amber's mom said she hasn't seen Willow since this afternoon and Amber doesn't know where Willow could be. She has her phone turned off." Julia informed me with a sad smile. This couldn't be happening. Willow couldn't be possibly running away. "Are you sure you checked her bedroom. Even the closet?" Julia asked for the hundredth time. "Yes!" I shouted. "I've checked every nook and cranny in this place. Nothing! Where could she be!" I exclaimed. I ran a hand through my messy reddish brown curls. "Mom." Julia said lowly. I felt her hands on my shoulder. I slowed my breathing down as much as I could. Since Julia has found out the truth of me and KC, we've been having a better bond. A stronger relationship. The relationship I've longed for a while. "It's okay, Jules. I'll go out and look for her. You can drive to see Teddy. See how's he doing." I advised Julia, pushing past her to get to my car keys. "Teddy has Bethany. Ever since I told her how Teddy's her half brother, never had Beth flown down here in a snap. She's been staying with him. She even said how she'll stay here for a couple months too." Julia said with a smile. When she saw my face stay the same sorrow look, Julia's smile fell. "Sorry. I'll go out and find her with you." Julia urged. I shook my head. "Bentley's asleep. Just stay here and watch him while I'm out." I ordered Julia. Julia nodded, slowly. "Sure, but.. If something bad happens, I'm a phone call away." Julia said firmly. Such authority in her voice, just like Eli. A lump forming in my throat over my husbands-ex husbands name. I quickly swallow it down to my stomach. "Alright. Thank you Jules. I'll bring Willow home." I whispered. Julia nodded and slumped into the leather couch, grabbing the remote and turning the TV on, quickly absorbed into her show. I grabbed the car keys and was reaching for my coat, when the phone rang. Julia turned the volume down and looked at the phone and back at me. I quickly grabbed the phone and pressed Talk. "Hello?" I said quickly. "Clare? It's Alli." Alli. I haven't spoken to Alli since that day of our argument outside the Dot, where she told me off for the divorce. Why was she calling me now? "Clare?" Alli asked again. I snapped back into reality. "Uh, yeah I'm here Alli, but I have to go, Willow ran away and I need to find her-" "She's here." Alli breathed. My heart lifted. My brain cleared. I could finally breathe. "Oh thank God. Is she okay?" I asked quickly. "Yes, she's here with Ian. Just come by and pick her up. She seems pretty upset." Alli observed. Alli pressed no further on the topic like she used too. Completely different communication when best friends fight.

"What in the world were you thinking, Willow?" I exclaimed once I had arrived to Alli's house. Willow was sitting next to Ian on the couch, Alli behind me. "I wanted to get away from you!" Willow exclaimed. I sighed, rubbing my left temple. "Willow, sometimes thing can't go your way. That's life." I explained to Willow, her small brows furrowing. "Is it so much to ask the real reason for divorcing Dad?" Willow sneered. My throat was closed up again. The mention of Eli, just his name makes me feel the tears sting before they overflow. "I already told you, Willow. Now just go wait for me in the car. You'll receive your punishment at home." I ordered, looking down at Alli's hardwood floors. "Mom-" "Now!" I shouted. Ian's eyes widen as the shouting that rolled off my tongue. Willow mumbled something incoherently before rushing out the door. Ian quickly slipped out once seeing Zachary peering in from upstairs. Thus leaving me and Alli alone. "She's pretty upset." I murmured. Alli merely nodded. "Much like a person I knew when she found out her parents were divorcing." Alli stated, looking me straight in the eye. I gulped, looking around nervously. "I can't control your life, Clare. Or even tell you what to do. But as your friend, please just listen to me." Alli pleaded. I didn't say a word, pursing my lips I looked at Alli's face. "You love Eli. I know that-hell everyone knows that. We know what he suffers through daily, Clare. We know that you're his rock, his real reason for living. Without you I guarantee that Eli would've committed suicide by now." Alli said lowly. "He's already tried." I sneered, remembering the sirens, the shouts, the screams that fled from Lizzy's mouth. Eli's limp body. The images flooded my mind, one after another. Like a photo album you don't want to look through because of the painful photos. "Your damn lucky he failed there, Clare." Alli whispered. I didn't say a word back, holding my tongue from saying any worse. Alli sighed, crossing her arms and brushing past me. "Close the door on your way out." Alli murmured, entering the kitchen. Leaving me alone.

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Not much to say, odd :/

Don't forget too.. Review?


	29. Broken Family

WARNING: big blocky chapter filled with TeddyxJulia moments, Eli's new apartment and a Eli moment :D

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Chapter Twenty-Nine: Broken Family (Julia's POV)

_Four Months Later:_

"So.. He's out?" Teddy asked, looking at me while I drove to the new address in my hand. "Yeah. Doctors think he's stable and he hasn't had a episode in weeks, almost a month." I said proudly. "Yeah, but didn't you tell him the new medication they have on your Dad like really strong. Knocks him out for hours?" Teddy questioned. I mentally kicked myself, of course that was the reason for Dad's no episode reason. He had been out on strong pills no doubt. "What about the depression?" Teddy questioned again, drumming his fingers on his knee. "He's still depressed. Depression can't just go away during the night, Dad's been seeing a therapist and on top of that he has depression medication along with his pills." I drawled on, exhausting myself with all the information. "Damn. Does he remember to take it all?" Teddy asked, a bit alarmed. "Adam calls him everyday to remind him. So far Dad's been in this apartment for a couple weeks. I gave him time to unpack." I said, while making a right turn down Dad's street. "Does your Mom know you're here?" Teddy asked, his eye's big. I chuckled. "I'm almost eighteen, Teddy. Don't be getting on my back too. It's enough having to hear the college lecture over and over. It's so tiring." I complained. Teddy chuckled. "Your so melodramatic." Teddy murmured. I felt a quick swift kiss on my cheek, leaving a spot of warmness on my cheek. "But that makes you look so beautiful." Teddy whispered. Most likely he was smirking at my obvious blush. So red and prominent on my pale skin, Teddy does enjoy poking fun at me during my not so great moments. "Your such a ass." I mumbled. "A cute ass though. Right?" Teddy asked with a grin. "Shut up." I scowled as I parked in front of the apartments. "Nice place." Teddy complimented the white building. "Will you ever be staying with him during weekends or anything?" Teddy quipped, taking my hand in his as we approached the building. "Probably not. I rarely ever saw him at mental asylum, highly doubt Mom will let me see him here." I grumbled, clearly by the look on my face, I was upset and pissed about Mom and Dad's divorce and more upset that I rarely ever saw him. I quickly knocked on the apartment door B3. Then I saw him, completely different from the father I last saw at the asylum. His hair was shorter, still in the same style he always wore. It was his eyes, they no longer held that confused glazed expression I always use to see. They held this compassion that I grew up with. My favorite emerald eyes. "Jules." Dad gasped, soon I was in his grip. I pulled my hand from Teddy's and wrapped my arms around his neck, leaning my head onto his. Soon we broke apart. "Didn't think you'd be coming over so soon." Dad said. "Is this a bad time or something?" I asked nervously. "Me and Teddy can go.." "No. No. Stay. I just expected that your… mother wouldn't allow you to come over." Dad mumbled. I chuckled. "I'm almost eighteen, hence I'm a good sneaker." I said proudly. Dad smirked. "Well come inside. Both of you." Dad said, taking a glance at Teddy before retreating back inside. I followed Dad into his apartment, taking in the scene around me. It all reflected his personality. Black leather couches, a small TV, pictures of me, Willow and Bentley. I even saw Adam up there with Fiona a couple of times. I saw none of Mom. I can somewhat feel what my Dad feels, if he hung a picture of Mom up on the wall, it would be impossible to bring it down. It would be heart wrenching to walk past her picture every morning and know that you can't have her anymore. To know that she isn't yours anymore. To know that you want to wake up with her in your arms, but to just see that there's nothing there. That you're alone. "Is this you, Jules?" Teddy chuckled, I saw that he was looking at a picture. Coming closer into view I saw that it was me when I was smaller. I was with Dad, I was on his back big smiles plastered on our faces. "That was when Julia was three. It was in the backyard and you wanted a piggyback ride. Who was I to decline?" Dad said with a smile. "Who took the picture?" I asked, smiling at the picture. Dad coughed into his fist, obvious nervousness. "Your mother did." My smile on my face fell quickly. Dad's face was blank, no emotion. Most likely Mom's face is soaring through his mind a million miles an hour. I needed to talk to him. This needed to be resolved. "Teddy.. Can you give me and my Dad a few minutes?" I asked. Teddy nodded. "I'll be outside." I felt a reassuring squeeze from Teddy on my hand before he exited the apartment. "So.. You and Teddy are dating now?" Dad said, obviously switching the subject. I sighed. "Yeah.. We've been dating since his accident with his dad.. KC." I said lowly. "Is the bastard in prison?" Dad asked. I nodded. More silence was between us. "I want to talk about you and Mom." I murmured. Dad walked away, sitting on the leather couch. "Nothing to talk about. There's nothing there." Dad said distantly. Almost as if he wasn't here. "Don't say that." I scolded, taking a seat by him and placing a hand over his. An automatic flinch came from him, that was normal. He always flinched to an unknown touch he isn't aware of. I kept my grasp on his large hand. "There is something there." I said firmly. "Like what?" Dad whispered, he turned his head to look at me. His eyes holding an emotion that could break my heart. The emotion of being alone. "You love her. She loves you." I said plainly. "It's always been that way, Dad." "Things change Julia. People change." Dad said. "Not all people do." I whispered. "You haven't. Your still the same Dad who would play with me. Sing me to sleep. Tell me there was no monsters in the closet." Dad's corner of his mouth started to lift. He was starting to smile. "The Dad who took me to a Deadhand reunion concert when I was five. The Dad who loves me." I stated. "Why can't you see that?" I asked. Dad took a shaky breath in. "Because.. Everytime I look into the mirror.. I see a monster. I've always seen a monster. Why else do you think I have no mirrors in the apartment." Dad said slowly. I looked around to see that there was no mirror hanging in the living room. Probably none in the bathroom or bedroom. "I can't look into any more mirrors. I see myself differently." Dad admitted with a grimace. "I see a man who has betrayed his loved ones. A man who has murdered. A man who shouldn't be allowed to walk the gravel on this earth. A man unworthy of life itself." Dad said through clenched teeth. "I hate myself every goddamn day, Julia. Everyday." Dad admitted. I felt the tears glisten in my eyes. "Don't say that.. Don't." I said firmly. Dad opened him mouth to respond, but nothing came out. Finally, he spoke a word. "I need Clare." Dad gasped. His emerald eyes true and meaningful. He meant it all. "You'll get Mom, Dad. You will get her back." I said truthfully. "I promise you that I'll have you two back together." I promised. "What if she doesn't want me? What if she rejects me?" Dad asked, his voice a pitch higher. I shook my head. "She wouldn't dare. Mom isn't that cold hearted." I joked with a smirk. Dad mirrored the smirk on his face. "I'm lucky to have a daughter like you." Dad murmured. My smirk turned into a smile. "I'm lucky to have a father like you."

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This is all building up to a lot! Eleven more chapters after this! That will include, kidnapping, death, suicide, obsession. Yeah, I'm fucking going there. Don't forget too..

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	30. Chances

WARNING: an incredibly sad chapter, get your puffs to wipe your nose on

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Chapter Thirty: Chances (Eli's POV)

_One Week Later:_

"This won't work, Jules. I just know it." I mumbled. Julia sat next to me, a smile on her face. "Dad. Mom is being forced to speak with you. You should be doing backflips right now." Julia stated. I stirred uncomfortably on the couch. Despite its been a year since stepping foot into this house, it had that same feel of normality. I just felt unsafe. Like I should be looking over my shoulder every second. "I'm too nervous." I admitted, twirling my thumbs. "Dad, just chill. Mom's going to be here any second." Julia warned. I scowled. "Yeah, that makes me feel anymore safe and not nervous." I spat. Julia scowled herself and looked away. "Your lucky I was able to clear the house for you and Mom. Bentley's at his little friend's house and Willow's on a date with Ian." Julia said, as if she was somewhat proud of clearing the house. My mind was just fixated on the words of Willow on a date with Ian. Ian _Turner. _"Willow's with Ian? Who approved this?" I asked firmly. Julia smirked. "I did of course. They're dating, Dad." Julia admitted. "Duh." Julia added. I clenched a fist and looked at Julia from the corner of my eye. "Don't 'duh' me, Julia. I'm still your father." I said. Julia shook her head and looked away. Suddenly the sound of the lock turning and keys jumbling. She was here. Clare was here. "Shit." I mumbled. "Calm down, Dad." Julia whispered. "Let me do the talking." Julia said. I nodded, knowing I wouldn't even be able to say a word. I was like a mute at the moment. I can't find my tongue. Was that a good thing? "Julia? Willow? Bentley? I'm home and I brought-" Clare then came into the living room, a bag in her hand and her purse in her other. Her cheeks were flushed and her blue eyes widen. She was in complete and utter shock. "Eli?" Clare gasped through her pink lips. I gulped and stood up, Julia doing the same. I wanted to say "Uh.. Yeah. That's me." but I couldn't find my tongue. Instead Julia used hers. "Mom. I brought Dad over." Julia admitted, somewhat proud. Like she accomplished the top of her list. "Oh, Julia Anne." Mom scowled. "Just please Mom?" Julia pleaded. To my own surprise, Julia approached Mom and placed her hands on her shoulders and smiled. "Do this for me." Julia whispered. Mom sighed, her face and mind were contemplating. "I don't know, Julia-" "Okay! I'll be out with Teddy. I'll be back later." Julia chirped, clear smugness on her face before she grabbed Morty's keys and dashed from the house before Clare could scold her. Clare turned to look at me. We said no words. Perhaps neither of us could find our tongues.

"I'm so sorry about Julia." Clare said finally after we stood in the living room for ten minutes. I counted. "It's nothing." I murmured softly. "I had given her my new address and she came to visit me. She wants us to talk." I said, admitting Julia's plan. Clare sighed, setting her purse and bag down. "I wasn't expecting you to be coming over." Clare said, sort of snobby. The word slashed across the bandaged heart. "Well I did." I snipped back, finding my clever and witty tongue. Clare somewhat glared at me under her lashes. "You should have known better than to have come here." Clare said lowly. "We're divorced." Clare said firmly. Another slash. This woman was going to tear those bandages off. "Yeah. I know." I snipped back. Clare was taken back by my snippy tone. Clare mumbled something incoherent under her breath before taking her bag and her purse and heading towards the stairs. I quickly followed her, I wasn't giving up that easily. "Where are you going?" I asked, watching as she climbed the stairs. I was quick to follow her, but I couldn't move. I was frozen. Stood still at the foot of the stairs. "I'm going to my room, is that okay?" Clare sneered. When she didn't hear a clever remark from my mouth at her, she turned around. I had my eyes to the floor. I couldn't move. It was impossible. "Are you okay?" Clare asked softly. Her tone back to that reassuring tone she uses on me after a episode. The kind that would calm me down, make me feel loved and safe. If only it could have that effect now. "Eli?" Clare asked again, stepping off onto the stairs toward me. I staggered back. "I should go." I muttered, turning around for the door. "Sorry for interrupting your day, Clare." I apologized quickly, grabbing my keys from my pocket. Surprisingly I felt a hand on my arm, flinch. I turned around to see Clare was there, holding my arm. Stopping me from leaving. We didn't say a word. Just stood there and stared at each other. Her blue eyes cooling my angry emerald eyes. "What is this?" I whispered, my eyes still intact into hers. "What do you mean?" Clare whispered, keeping the gaze steady. "Us. Here. Now." I whispered coolly. "I don't know. I thought I knew, Eli. I thought that I really knew." Clare admitted, her cheeks flushing from embarrassment. "Tell me what you want." I murmured. "I'll give it to you." I promised. Clare breathed slowly, breaking the gaze and looking away. Each second gave a notch to my heart, making it eat at the bandages wrapped around the healing heart. "I want you." Clare admitted, tears glistening in the light. Before I knew it, I had my lips pressed against hers. Both of my hands on either side of her face, pulling her closer with deepening of the kiss. I could feel her tears slide down my hand, with a quick motion, I wiped them away. Clare's hands were on my back, her fingernails gripping onto my jacket. I held her closer, tighter. I didn't want her go. I didn't want this moment to end. I wanted to stay like this, forever. Forever never happens to me, because Clare suddenly pulled away, pushing my hands off her face. Her makeup was smudged and her reddish brown curls were a mess. "What was that!" Clare gasped. I felt yet another slash. "A kiss." I said dimly. I reached out for her hand, but Clare jerked her hand back. My face fell at the action. "No. I didn't want a kiss." Clare sneered. Clear confusion fell over me. "You said you wanted me. So I gave you me. Clare you have me!" I shouted, making gestures toward me. "I don't want you." Clare said lowly. Her blue eyes confirming her action. Four slashes across the heart. More quicker and more blood. When no words escaped Clare's mouth, I knew she meant the words. _She meant the words_. "Then why'd you say that you wanted me?" I squeaked. My voice was higher, I was getting close to breaking down and sobbing. "I didn't want to hurt your feelings, Eli. I lied." Clare said, her tone varied on truthful or lying. At this moment I couldn't detect. I could only feel the bandages that have worked hard to wrap around my heart for a year fall apart. I could feel the slashes, but it turned into a numbing pain. "This really was a mistake." I murmured, realizing my mistake. Clare nodded. "We need to be apart, Eli. It's not because of Munro or because you tried to kill yourself. It's because we aren't meant for one another. We don't click, we don't have those moments. I don't feel.. I don't love you anymore." Clare whispered. Stab. Rip. Stomp. The heart went down on the cold ground taking the stabs and the rips and the forceful stomps. It didn't yelp. It didn't scream. It laid there and took the beating, because the heart knew it had messed up and was paying the price for it. "I just wanted another chance." I murmured softly. Clare wrapped her arms around herself. "Sometimes chances aren't needed."

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DON'T MURDER ME! You guys wanted Eli/Clare and I knew you'd guys be upset. BUT! A big tragedy happens (two actually) the first one might bring these two together. They'll get another chapter. Maybe. Don't forget too..

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	31. Blade

WARNING: serious cute shit at the beginning then serious shit at the end

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Chapter Thirty-One: Blade(Teddy's POV)

_Three Days Later:_

"This movie's gay." I muttered. Julia playfully hit me across the chest. "No it's not. Shut up." Julia defended her movie. I sighed and looked back at the television screen. Hearing the never ending drone from the male lead. _"Say it. Out loud." "Vampire." "Are you afraid?" "No." _Then like some freaking superhero he throws the depressed girl on his back and runs through the forest. "Are you serious?" I asked loudly. Julia looked over at me, with clear annoyance on her face. "Must you be so annoying?" Julia scowled. I chuckled. "Must you be so cute when your angry?" I teased, playfully hitting Julia's nose with my finger. Julia smirked and blushed, looking back at the screen. I watched as the vampire told the depressed girl, Bella I believe her name was, that he is a vampire and sparkles in the sun. Bella than tells him that she loves him or something like that and he says he's a lion and she's a lamb and he wants to eat her, but loves her. "You actually like this?" I muttered in Julia's ear. Julia giggled at the touch of the air in her ear. The small hint of the blush on her cheeks made the sides of my mouth turn upward. She was absolutely beautiful. "Yes." Julia murmured. "It's a classic." Julia added, waving the box to the movie in front of my face, bopping me in the nose with it. "Twilight? Doesn't your Mom watch these with Alli?" I asked, remembering a while ago when Julia had told me her Mom has movie nights with Alli, when we were getting to know each other. "Yeah, before my Mom and Alli stopped talking." Julia scowled, taking the movie box from me and flinging it across my living room, hitting the wall with a thud before falling. I carefully put an arm around Julia, holding her close. "Calm down, Jules. You can't just be super girl and change all your parents relationships." I murmured. Julia sighed, rolling her eyes. "I can't fix my own parents relationship. That's just so.. Pathetic." Julia whispered. "Your not pathetic. I'm pretty damn proud of you for trying to make your parents like each other again." I said proudly. Julia looked up at me, smirking. "Really?" Julia said softly, everytime her voice did that I imagined her as that little girl hanging on Eli's wall. The one who believed that Marilyn Manson was God and it was okay to make mistakes. I imagine her like that, but once that reverie snaps away I see her as Julia. The seventeen year old who is almost legal, afraid of being out there in the world, worrying about her father and mother's relationship, scared for her father's state of mind. A shaky girl afraid of the world. "Yes. Your parents, they're made for each other Jules. Just give your Mom some time to come around." I murmured, I knew this was true. I've seen the way Eli and Clare were around each other before the divorce, always kissing and snuggling. Just a couple in love, living their life. Then when tragedy strikes, Clare's like a little girl. Running from the pain. I could tell Julia this, but most likely she'll bring it up in a fight with Clare and Clare wouldn't be pleased. "Thank you." Julia whispered, getting closer to me. Her face getting closer. Her plump lips so close to mine. "Your welcome." I whispered so softly before her lips touched mine. I was wound into the kiss, her arms around my neck, holding on tight as I knocked her down on the couch, me on top. Julia pulled away in a fit of giggles. "Dammit Teddy. Get off." Julia said in a hushed voice. I chuckled. "Not so easy, Ms. Goldsworthy." I said seductively, my position in a straddle. Julia allowed a small moan to escape her lips and I snorted. "Oh my God.. This is hilarious." I said through chuckles. "Shut up and kiss me." Julia growled with a smile. "Saucy." I said. Julia brought me down and our lips collided once more. Her leg curved around my back, I gently rubbed her leg in a movement up and down, getting numerous moans from her. I didn't even laugh because me myself was suppressing the biggest moan. "What the hell are you two doing?" A voice chirped from behind us, I immediately sat up, as did Julia. Bethany Middleton was before us, hands on her hips showing off her pink nails. Her thick blond hair in ringlets around her face and her brown eyes-our brown eyes were full of curiosity. "Do I want to know what you two were doing?" Bethany asked again. I felt my face heat and looked over at Julia, who's face was flushed as well. "We were making out." I said softly, looking up at Bethany from under my bangs. Bethany sighed. "I swear, all you teenagers are just hormone filled sex addicts." Bethany said. I chuckled. "Coming from the product of a teenage pregnancy?" I teased. Bethany playfully slapped me. "Your not injured anymore so I have the right to push you around." Bethany joked. I smirked and looked over to see Julia smiling as well, making me smile. "I'll be out with this cute guy I met at the bookstore." Bethany informed me. "Do I need to meet this guy, Beth?" I teased. Bethany smiled. "Nope. I'm the older one here, you're the one who need's looking out for. I'll be back by eleven. Or twelve. Hell maybe even one." Bethany said with a grin. "Bye Teddy, Bye Jules. Tell Uncle Eli I said Hi!" Bethany shouted before leaving us alone. "That was.." Julia trailed off after Bethany left. "Embarrassing?" I said. Julia nodded. "Very." Julia agreed. We said nothing, but just sat in silence. After our moaning make out session we just sort of.. Sat there. Awkward beyond belief. I felt Julia's hand intertwine with mine and I looked up, smiling. "Your so handsome, Teddy." Julia whispered, touching my cheek with her other hand. I snorted. "Yeah right. I look like KC." I sneered. Julia put on a sympathetic smile. "So? That doesn't make you KC. It makes you Teddy." Julia whispered, her cool breath on my skin. I grinned. "You really make a guy feel better." I said. Julia smirked. "It's a Goldsworthy trait. We have others." Julia teased. I knew where this was heading. "May I see the others?" I joked, even raising my eyebrow. Julia didn't say a word, her eyes were widening. "What is it Jules?" I asked, teasing still in my tone. Julia opened her mouth to say words, but nothing came out. Her face was blank. No emotion. Although her emerald eyes were widening. "What are you looking at?" I asked, my attention on her. Julia gulped. "Behind you." Julia whispered. I looked behind myself to see a person I thought was gone. But she was here. Wielding a silver blade in her hand, her large brown eyes menacing. Full of revenge. Her long brown hair was a mess of knots. "You lied." Lilith sneered. Before I knew it, I was on the ground in a swift movement, Julia's screams deafening my mind and soon I heard a thump beside me. Before my eyes shut, I saw Julia slumped next to me. Blood running down her face.

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…. Hate me? Don't forget too..

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	32. Kidnapped

WARNING: blood, yeah lots of blood and unanswered things. Lots of shit that happens and everybody hates. Do enjoy and hate me for making it miserable!

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Chapter Thirty-Two: Kidnapped (Julia's POV)

Cold. I was cold. Wherever I was.. It was cold. I was in a strange position, not comfortable at all. Where was I? I tried to open my eyes, but one was definitely swollen shut, I managed to open the other which was slightly swollen. My vision was blurry the walls were in a flurry around me. I couldn't see straight. It's as if I have been out for more than just a few hours. Feels like days. After blinking a few painful times, I saw that I was in a warehouse. _Warehouse? _It was abandoned and I could make out the old sign that was hung on the wall. _Guthrie's Ice Cream. _Guthrie? As in Teddy's last name? His ancestors. Teddy. Where the hell was he? I looked around, but automatically I felt a sharp pang in my neck. Obviously I was injured in more than my eye. It felt as if someone had tied a rope around my neck and strangle me. I felt as if.. I was wanted to be killed. My mind suddenly reversed and I remembered what had happened. It was all so clear.. So vivid..

_Just pretend to be dead. I told myself mentally. If you pretend then she won't hurt you. She won't hurt you. I kept telling that to myself over and over. I kept my eyes shut tight, I was afraid of opening my eyes. Afraid to open and see her standing over, afraid to see what's happened to Teddy. Afraid period. "You lied to me." Lilith sneered. I tried to hold back a whimper. Anything to get her away from Teddy. I didn't want her to hurt him.. If she even remotely touches him I will spring up and attack her. I do not care if she's fifteen, I will attack her. I will attack her for Teddy. Anything for Teddy. Yet, I had to keep quiet. If she even remotely knew that I was somewhat in a dazed awake, she would hurt me to no end. "Why'd you lie?" Lilith growled. "I lied to protect Julia!" Teddy shouted, obviously being at a torture point. I tried to hold back a whimper, a scream. Anything to let him know. "I protected her because I know you'd hurt her." Teddy said lowly. Lilith cursed under her breath. "I did. Are you happy? Your girlfriend's on the ground unconscious." Lilith said with pleasure. Teddy winced, either due to pain or me. "No I'm not. What'd you hit her with?" Teddy growled, his voice high on concern. "Nothing for you to know of." Lilith sneered. "I'm angry that you'd lie to me, Teddy. We had something." Lilith purred. "We're brother and sister, Lilith!" Teddy shouted. My ears were filled with Teddy's screams. I flung my eyelids open and stood up quickly, my legs shaky. Still in Teddy's house. "Leave him alone!" I shouted, Lilith spun around. She had Teddy in a headlock, a knife at his neck. Her silver blade, it was pressed so close. So close and she could slit his throat. He could die. Teddy dying.. Thoughts brought to a abrupt stop when Lilith struck me with a heavy object, I hit my head on the corner of the coffee table. Immediately knocked out, my last sound was Teddy's screams continuing to ring in my ears. _

What had she struck me with. A tool? Something that struck me hard to knock me out. I could feel the pain in my neck and head. Throbbing pain. "Teddy?" I whispered. Where was he? "Teddy?" I hissed. "Cute." A high strung voice chirped. I looked up to see Lilith was there, the blade in her hand. Silver and glistening with.. Blood. Blood. I tried my best to hold back vomit, swallowing to keep the vile thoughts in my mind. "Your looking for Teddy. Calling his name out. What did you expect? For him to have escape his ties and untie you. Both of you get help and I get in the slammer? Happily ever after?" Lilith hissed. I gulped. A witty comeback slithering up my throat and bursting out. "You'd be with your father." I spat. Suddenly, Lilith had the bloody silver blade at my neck. The blood was warm and wet against my skin. Fresh blood was on her blade. Teddy. "Do you want me to cut you? I know the main arteries in your neck.. Slice one and you have two minutes to live Julia." Lilith chuckled. "Such a nice thought of you.. Death. Besides, you look like the walking dead." Lilith smirked. Her smirk was more sickening than to be cute and joking. It made more vomit come up. "Clever." I remarked, using my father's witty tongue. A tongue I am proud to talk with. Lilith scowled and allowed the knife to skim my skin, his teeth marking my flesh. I felt the sting, the blade was cutting. She made the cut halfway across my flesh before removing the blade. Dripping with my blood. I breathed rapidly, the pain becoming more intense, sure the cut wasn't deep. It hurt nonetheless. "It hurts.." I winced, feeling more stings when moving my neck. Lilith giggled. "Good. I wanted that, Julia." Lilith admitted. I scowled. "Why?" I shouted. Lilith turned around and looked at me. "Because I hate you. Isn't it obvious. I brought you and Teddy here to this old abandoned warehouse with my family's last name." Lilith said nonchalantly. "Teddy's here? Where?" I shouted. Once again I found the blade at my right cheek, warm with my blood. "Please-" I tried to say, Lilith didn't listen, She scraped the blade across my cheek. I yelped in pain, feeling the blood run down my cheek and the immediate pain from the cut. Lilith ended the cut at my mouth, pulling the blade away and smiling. "Will you shut up now?" Lilith questioned, I didn't answer, just breathed rapidly after another cut. "Teddy's in another room. He just.. Had some fun with me." Lilith purred with flushed cheeks. I gasped from the pain and the words. "You two had sex?" I yelped. Lilith growled. "You're not proud?" Lilith asked slowly, twirling the blade in her hand, my blood all over her hand. "No!" I shouted. Lilith threw me down on the floor, my face smashed with the concrete and I felt Lilith untie my ties, was she letting me go? Finally realizing her mistake? I was sadly mistaken, feeling her grab one arm and take the blade and made in run from my elbow to the wrist. Screams. Shouts. Pleas. Nothing stopped Lilith. She ran the cut over and over. The blood overflowing. Finally the sound of something falling caught her attention, Lilith grabbed her blade and ran off to the other side. I felt the tears finally come and drench my face. I sobbed, making pathetic choking sounds while crying. The pain in my neck, cheek and arm were blinding me. I couldn't see or feel anything else. I wanted help. I wanted someone to barge through the doors and help me. Could anyone help me? A loud scream echoed the warehouse. I winced, the scream was Teddy's. He couldn't help me and I couldn't help him. I wasn't about to leave him and ditch, lovers don't leave each other. I sighed, finally admitting to myself that I loved him. I actually love someone and it hurts to know that their so near, yet so far. Dizziness overcame me again, the feeling of seeing the world in a flurry. I collapsed, hands still untied and dozed into unconsciousness. Where I was safe.. For now.

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Lilith is a complete bitch, she has her problems. Next chapter will not have the Julia and Teddy problem, but address Clare. My most hated character, might actually gain some fans back. Who knows? Anyone else love Eli's new storyline, hoarding? I actually was touched by the episode, it was Munro's acting that made it so real. I cried, I'll admit it. Hopefully the storyline rolls into more episodes. Sorry for not updating in a while, I've gotten so much feedback from my cliffhanger, not that big of one here, but there will be in a couple episodes. Leading up to where you all will hate me. This story has its unhappy endings for some. &&Don't forget too..REVIEW?


	33. Closer

WARNING: bunch of sad stuff and cute stuff rolled into one!

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Chapter Thirty-Three: Closer (Eli's POV)

_Been a week since Julia's disappearance, a day since her day of awakening_

Could words explain how I was feeling? Could words explain the pain my ripped chest? Could words explain the past week? I suppose they could or couldn't. Depends. One word was striking me against the skull numerous times. _Disappearance. _Where did Julia go? Where did my daughter.. My pride and joy.. Where did she go? She was gone. Went to have a movie date with Teddy and soon I'm receiving a call from Bethany the day after, asking if Teddy was with us, he wasn't there. Not in his room, Julia wasn't there either. Both were gone. I had just suspected that maybe they had gone out for a drive in Morty and slept in the back, things I use to do with.. Clare. Ache. Although Bethany discovered the blood on the carpet, stained and in blotches. Then I worried. My daughter was gone, her boyfriend was gone and her car was too. Yet, they didn't run away like the police suspected. None of their clothes were gone, Julia's phone was at home and Teddy's was thrown in the corner of the living room. Used as evidence since it had blood on it. It was like a crime scene there, thus Bethany has been staying with me. Julia was gone. I felt complete blame on my shoulders, heavy and known. I had felt this same guilt after Julia died, feeling as if I caused her death. I still do believe I was a large reason why, being with.. Clare. Ache. Stomp. Rip. Clare had helped me through it, helped me see that I wasn't the only reason. The weight had disappeared every day, getting easier until it was off and only in my mind did I remember. Here I am again, with the same weight on my shoulders, heavier than the last. I had allowed Julia to have a movie date with Teddy, they hadn't had that much time to each other and Julia's been spending her time with me. I let her have fun. I should've let her stay with me, safe in the extra bedroom where she won't be hurt. I was again, another reason for a.. death. I had this strong feeling in my stomach that Julia was dead.. She was somewhere. Dead. Mangled. Possibly raped and murdered. Who knows if Teddy might be dead too. Or if Teddy even hurt her. Maybe they'll find Morty overturned in a ditch and find my Julia in there with Teddy. Both dead from their injuries. "Uncle Eli." Bethany whispered. I hadn't realized that she was here with me. We were sitting on log faraway from the investigation. All police officers were searching the forest, seeing if they could find any clues. "Please don't cry. It makes me cry." Bethany said, her voice choked. I looked up through blurry eyes to see Bethany, tears rimming her brown eyes. "Sorry Beth." I mumbled, wiping the tears that had profusely ran down my cheeks, making my vision more clear. "It's okay." Bethany murmured, she intertwined my hand with hers and she laid her head on my shoulder. I could hear her sniffles and small sobs. We didn't say a word to each other, just sat there in utter silence. I looked off into the deep dark forest. There was so many forests in Toronto, they couldn't possibly check them all. They'd give up, as they do with all kidnapping stories and just say the victims are dead. Give us a small memorial and start off on another case. Same old shit everytime. "Aunt Clare!" Bethany exclaimed. I felt her hand untangled from mine and she leaped up to Clare. Clare was standing nearby, her eyes blotchy from crying. Bethany threw her arms around Clare's neck and hugged her. More sobs coming from Bethany. I hadn't seen Clare since the day I went over to her house, try to talk to her. Felt her lips against mine. Felt as if it was old times. I was wrong. Her telling me that she doesn't want me and pities me. I need no one's pity. I couldn't help but to look at her from the corner or my eye. Her reddish brown hair was mess, pulled into a clip on the side of her head. No makeup, she looked natural. She wore a grey cardigan and jeans. Flats she wore beneath her. After the long hug, Bethany let go, feeling her pocket. "I think that's Mom or Daniel calling." Bethany murmured, whipping her phone out and answering. "Mom? No Mom, I'm okay here. When is your plane landing?" Bethany asked, quickly. Of course Jenna was flying down, possibly bringing Daniel as well. More regret, she was missing out on interviews, making music, singing all for Julia and Teddy. It wasn't fair for her to take numerous breaks to fly to Canada, she didn't have too. I was sure that Hollywood was more special. Bethany walked away, still with Jenna on the phone. Déjà vu struck me as I was alone with Clare again. I couldn't find my tongue.

I had my head down, staring down at the dirt covered ground. I hadn't looked up once, I couldn't look up. I couldn't look up to see my object of desire just stand there. So easy to get, but not easy to keep. The thoughts of her intoxicating presence kept my mind swirling around with thoughts of her. How she looked when she woke up, her face looking like a bunny whenever she smiled, the way she would sit in my lap endlessly for hours. Just in silence. It was amazing. Yet all crumbles with me around. It always crumbles when I'm around. I can never seem to stop that from occurring. Almost like a curse was placed upon the Goldsworthy name. Wear the name and you pay the real price. Something I feared greatly for Julia, Willow and Bentley. Although the deed was sealing itself on Julia, wherever she was.. I didn't want her hurt. I wanted her here, next to me. With me. That way I know she's safe. "What are we going to do?" Clare whispered. I looked up quickly to see Clare had taken Bethany's seat next to me. Her head was down, I couldn't really see her face. "Eli.. What are we going to do if Julia's dead.. I don't want my baby dead." Clare gasped. I saw then the tears racing down her cheeks. Without a second thought, I wrapped my arms around Clare and shifted her to where her head was in my chest, deep and safe. I could hear her rippled sobs from her chest, slithering up into choked sobs from her mouth. Her tears soaked through my cotton tee and I felt her salty tears on my bare chest underneath. I slowly rubbed my hands up and down her back in a soothing motion. Clare didn't say a word, just stayed in my embrace. I gently allowed my lips to skim her reddish brown hair and finally land on her temple, giving her skin a small kiss. Clare's sobs seemed to stop and I felt her pull away. Her face was looking at me, I saw her blotchy face, the puffy eyes. Anything to make her beautiful. "I don't deserve you." Clare whispered. I furrowed my brows. "It should be the other way around, Clare." I said, it was true. I didn't deserve Clare, she was too nice, too giving. Too amazing for me. "No.. I don't deserve a good hearted man like you." Clare murmured. "I never did. Right from the beginning, Eli. I should've never fought Alli for my glasses, you wouldn't have ran over them." Clare breathed, remembering our first meeting. The first time I laid eyes on her, her big blue eyes widening as she saw my dark sleek figure. I had known from that minute she was something, it was just something that was around her. It was bliss. Bliss is what I felt enter my body and never left. Clare's bliss. "If you never fought Alli for those glasses.. I would've never met you. I would've never seen your pretty face." I whispered. Clare shook her head, lowering her head to allow more tears to be shed. "I never imagined my life turning out this way." Clare murmured. I grabbed Clare's chin softly and brought her face to look up at mine. "I didn't either." I whispered. I heard a whimper escape Clare's throat, the words obviously hurting her. "But I wouldn't want it either way. I love my life." I whispered. Clare's eyes glistened with her tears, wide and happy. Clare placed a hand on my cheek and smiled. "You're a truly amazing man, Elijah. Truly amazing." Clare observed, her smile warming myself. I didn't say a word as I leaned forward and closed my eyes. Feeling her lips reaching mine eagerly in a blissful kiss. Clare deepen the kiss more, making me smirk throughout the kiss. Finally, I broke away. A clear smirk on my face. We didn't say a word, Clare intertwined her fingers with mine and sighed. "Julia." Clare breathed. "We'll have her back, Clare." I whispered. "What if she's gone, Eli? What if she's.. dead?" Clare said, her voice drifting off on the last word. "She isn't." I stated. "I won't allow it." I promised. A chain had attached itself to my heart, a new steel chain. Unbreakable and tough. Standing on the chain were many friends and family members. There was a blank space on the chain, although the figure appeared. Clare. A smile on her lips as she softly hummed to herself her favorite song. _I'm kissing you. _The scenes of Romeo and Juliet flying past me, although the images morphed into Clare and myself, finding ourselves and becoming who we are. What we stand for. How we stay bonded. The steel chain was going nowhere, mostly due to the fact that Clare was chained to the heart, a chain running from her heart to mine.

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Sure you're happy now. But you won't be soon. You'll hate me. Don't forget too..REVIEW?


	34. Bullets

WARNING: drama and death. I'm going there.

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Chapter Thirty-Four: Bullets (Julia's POV)

How much time has passed? I couldn't remember. I only remembered that it was a Friday night I was taken hostage from Lilith, how many days have passed that Friday? My head pounded against my skull, huge throbs against the skull. I slowly opened my eyes, regretting it because of my bruised eyes. More pain on my arm, as I tried to sit up. My hands were still untied, couldn't have been that long after Lilith's knife trip. Sitting on my rear, I leaned against the wall and held my arm. I saw the long bloody mess on my arm, dirt has infected it by now, I tried blowing air on it but that made the sting hurt more. The cut it resembled much to Dad's, a bit like Mom's. Sure Dad's was more ravaged and ugly and Mom's was a fainter white line, mine was somewhere in-between. The in-between of their scars. So odd.. It felt as if I'll suppose to have this scar as a reminder of who I am, the daughter of two strong bold people. "Does it hurt much?" A strained voice asked. I quickly looked around to see Teddy was looking down at me. His face was bruised and swollen, he doubled over a bit, his arm holding his stomach. "Slit throats don't hurt that bad." I joked, as a forced chuckle was bubbling up my throat I felt the pain in my throat, I winced. Teddy slowly kneeled down by me. "I'm so sorry." Teddy whispered, I felt him put something soft against my neck, his shirt. I looked to see him shirtless, if we weren't in this predicament I'd be joking around about his faint lines of a six pack appearing, but all I saw was slashes and bruises. "Where is she?" I whispered, looking around at the endless dark. "Asleep. I managed to sneak away from her." Teddy said in a hushed voice. "We need to get away, Jules. Anywhere, just far away to get to a phone booth. I don't want you anymore hurt." Teddy whispered, his voice thick of concern. I felt his fingertips which were rough trace my face, going over the bruises and his fingers skipped the slash across my cheek. "She got you pretty bad in the arm," Teddy said hushed, I looked down to see my bleeding arm was still bleeding bit by bit. I was more hurt by the slashed throat. "I'm so sorry." Teddy said, his voice pained. "I feel so guilty." Teddy admitted. I placed a hand on his face, feeling a raised bump. "Don't be. We're in this together, Teddy." I whispered. Teddy nodded, he quickly bent forward to plant a long kiss on my lips. I savored the kiss, feeling his lips with my tongue, feeling how chapped and they faintly tasted steel like, blood. I touched tongues with his and automatically we were tonguing. I enjoyed and savored each moment of our long lasting kiss. Teddy pulls away, his breathing ragged. "Let's go." Teddy whispered, I nodded and he slowly helped me up, I felt his arm go around my waist and I held onto the now bloody tee shirt against my neck. I looked down to see the numerous blood spots and puddles on the ground. I felt faint and dizzy standing up, Teddy had me in a strong grip. "I'm not letting you go, Jules." Teddy whispered. "I'll get you to a hospital before the night ends. I promised." Teddy said in a hushed voice. Both of us managed to struggle outside, it was raining heavily and I felt the blood from my cut wash away into my mouth, more steel. Shivers erupted in my body and I clung onto Teddy. "I'll get you there, Jules." Teddy said again, louder this time as we were outside. "Oh Theodore." A angry ravaged voice sprung from behind us, we quickly turned to see Lilith was standing there. Her hair was damp from the rain and she had this grimace on her face. "I wasn't finished." Lilith growled. Her hands were behind her back and I knew she has a weapon. I know she does. Slowly Lilith pulled a gun from behind her back. "I was planning on shooting Julia, Teddy. You see if I shoot Julia in the head and she dies from her brain being splattered on the ground, I could have you. I'd take you away and we could be together. But you betrayed me, Teddy. Your choosing Julia over me. Your little Lilly. The love of your-" Lilith was ranting on, her voice was becoming more ravaged with each word, Teddy than interrupted her. "I'm not your lover Lilith! I'm your older brother, I've always been your older brother! Nothing more!" Teddy snapped. Lilith's face dropped and she had a look of rejection on her dirty face. "But we.. We had sex." Lilith whimpered, her feelings were obviously hurt. Lilith was in love with her own brother. "I did it because I knew I'd be able to get Julia out of here. I did it for Julia." Teddy admitted, his voice truthful. Lilith's face was pain for a second before it switched to anger. Furious. "I can't believe you, Teddy. Choosing a Goldsworthy over me. She isn't worth a damn thing. No Goldsworthy is, their pathetic and alone. But you've made your choice." Lilith growled. I gulped as her eyes targeted my own. My heart stopped. The glare, the menacing look in her brown eyes. "I have to kill her." Lilith sneered. I opened my mouth to protest, but Lilith was determined. She pulled the trigger, the black bullet flying from the gun. I felt as if I was in slow motion seeing it, but the bullet never struck me. I was pushed to the ground in a instant, my face landing with the mud. I heard the bullet hit and a drop to the ground. Screams were muffled in my ears, I couldn't tell whose they were. The blood was seeping onto the muddy ground and I felt light headed. I couldn't see straight, but I did see lights. I took a last breath before closing my eyelids and seeping into unconsciousness.

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.. This is where you hate me. It troubles you knowing who died. Is it Julia? Teddy? Or Lilith. It's one of them. Someone dies. Two people actually die, but this is the big death. Get ready to hate me next chapter. Don't forget too..

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	35. Remembering

WARNING: whoever died.. Your name is here. I'm sorry for killing you off.

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Chapter Thirty-Five: Remembering (Julia's POV)

Beep. Shuffles. Murmurs. Cries. Sobs. Touching. Talking. This is what I have heard or felt faintly for a while. I knew the murmurs, some of the murmurs were new, some were old. I recognized a deep but loving voice, his hand was holding mine, I grew up holding that rough hand, but I never had I really wanted to have it held by him until now. Quiet murmurs were also heard, a familiar murmur that would sing to me softly. Despite that she couldn't sing, I still loved the voice. The touches were familiar as well, rough hands, big hands, soft hands, small hands. I knew them all. Nothing was coming to me though. It was if I was wandering around aimlessly in darkness, only hearing and feeling. I was a blind woman walking alone with a aid dog. It was a frightening place to be, not to see, but the touches and murmurs made me feel at home.. More comfortable. Yet after a while of walking blind, I had started to feel more alert. The senses were more powerful. The touches were warm and homely. The murmurs were getting louder. It was like the blind woman running to the end of the darkness, finally seeing the light and in a flash… right at home. "Julia." A soft voice whispered. I had reached the end of the tunnel and the murmured voice was now speaking my name. I couldn't respond, the pain hit me. My neck had a throbbing pain, as did my arm. The cheek didn't hurt that much, just a ping here and there. Yet my head was like a drum, constant drumming on my skull. The music was a heavy metal beat, as much as I love heavy metal, this was a beat I was sure to hate. "Julia." The voice murmured. I groaned, automatic pain in my throat. "Clare.. I think she's really waking up. Get the nurse." The voice had asked, more footsteps had left. "Open your eyes, Jules." The voice murmured. I didn't want to open my eyes, what if what I wanted wasn't there. What if I was back in the darkness. "Don't be afraid, Jules. It's just daddy." Dad had murmured. So it was Dad. The little voice in the back of the drums had been right. It was my father. Putting my trust in him I slowly opened my eyes which were swollen and it stung to open. "Slowly." Dad whispered. Slowly I opened the eyes and saw that the room wasn't that bright, but the lamp on the wall. Then I saw it was Dad's face above mine, dark purple circles under his emerald eyes. He looked older than he really was, he looked about fifty than forty. His dark brown hair was a mess and a small smile appeared on his lips. "Hey there." Dad whispered. I felt his cool breath on my face and I was immediately blissful. It was home. He was home. "Hey." I croaked. The sound coming from me sounded deep and dark. Not my voice at all. I felt Dad's fingers brush against my cheek. "It's nice to see your eyes open, sweetie." Dad murmured, using a pet name he rarely used. He always preferred using Jules or baby emeralds. Whatever suited him. "How long have I been out?" I croaked again. Dad looked behind him to where a calendar hung on the wall. I took note that I was in a hospital. A hospital room. "About a day, almost two. It's one thirty three in the morning." Dad said, looking back at me. "I was so worried." Dad murmured, true hurt in his eyes. A look of return but concern. Was it for me? Before I could even croak a answer a short stubby woman bustled into the room with Mom behind her. Mom's blue eyes had seen better days than Dad's, hers looked more well rested, but more puffy. Sudden tears fell from her eyes and she approached me, a hand on my head. "Hi baby girl." Mom whispered, using her old pet name for me. What was with all the pet names? Why was everyone treating me with such respect and concern? What had happened? "It seems like her signs are okay. Her heart's a bit fast paced, you okay there, Julianne?" The nurse said in a monotone. "Julia." Dad and me had said, his voice was larger and more irritable than the nurse. Obvious confrontation there. Dad and nurses were never a good mix. The nurse shot Dad a dirty look and Mom stepped in front of Dad, she took his hands in hers and looked him in the eye. "Elijah.. Calm down. If you don't I'll have you leave. You've caused enough scenes here." Mom ordered. Dad had a serious look in his emerald eyes, but it soften when he stared into Mom's. It looked as if they were a couple again. I could even see the glint of Mom's marriage ring, she was wearing her marriage ring, Dad still has his own on his finger. Dad's had a blue gem in the silver metal and Mom's had emerald gem in a gold band. Both complimenting the other's eyes. "Fine." Dad grumbled. Mom smiled and stretched up on her toes to my surprise, she kissed him. They actually kissed. How much had I missed? "Thank you." Mom murmured. Before turning to the nurse. "Is there a time we can take her home?" Mom asked. "Once her neck would is to a point where it's not going to bleed and it good for stitching, which will be in a couple days." The nurse informed Mom. Mom nodded. "Julia. There will be a officer coming to speak to you about the kidnapping." The nurse informed me. My eyes widen and a pang went through my face. "Kidnapping?" I whispered. The nurse looked up at me, as did Mom and Dad. "Julia. You were kidnapped by Lilith." Mom said slowly. "Don't you remember. Jules you were there for a week." Dad murmured, clear confusion on his face. Before I even had time to comprehend what had happened, the beeps on the monitor was getting faster as my heart did. Blades. Blood. Cutting. Stabbing. Hurting. Screams. It was all coming to me. The way Lilith had hurt me and Teddy. _Teddy. _"Julia. Julia, just calm down." Dad said soothingly, I hadn't realized that he was next to me, holding my hand, Mom on my other side. "Where's Teddy?" I gasped. The room went quiet as did my heart. The nurse just abruptly left the room and I looked at Mom and Dad's faces. Dad's face had fell and he had a twisted look of despair on his face. Mom's face held sadness. A combination I couldn't understand. "Where's Teddy?" I asked louder, my voice cracking. "Jules-" Mom began, but I cut her off. "No. Tell me where my boyfriend is? Where is Teddy?" I asked more bitter. Mom looked at Dad and he nodded. "Julia.. Teddy died." Dad said in a soft voice. My world stopped. The heart. The mind. The touch. Everything had abruptly stopped. "The gunshot from the gun punctured him in the head. Killed him instantly." Dad said again, his voice cracking. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't function. "We're so sorry, Jules." Dad said, a tear falling from his face. What I looked like I didn't know and I didn't care. All I knew was that.. Teddy was dead. He died. When Lilith aimed that gun at me, my head, Teddy had pushed me down. Saved my life, but took his own. "No.." I gasped. Dad nodded. "He can't be.. He was there." I said, remembering him holding the shirt to my throat, helping me live a little longer. "He is." Dad said, clear angst in his voice. "He isn't! I know he isn't!" I shouted, my voice hurting. Mom's sobs were beside me and I looked Dad clear in the eye. "Don't lie! Tell me where he is!" I shouted, my voice gaining momentum. When Dad's eyes just widen, he didn't move or speak a word, I reached over and grabbed the IV in my arm, attempting to pull it. Dad's hand on mine, using his strength to keep me down. "DON'T LIE! TELL ME WHERE HE IS! TELL ME NOW!" I shouted. I wasn't thinking, I just needed him. He wasn't dead. He couldn't be. I began to fight against Dad's strength, beating his chest with small pathetic punches that did no good. Dad didn't say a word as I finally collapsed in his arms and sobbed. My sobs the loudest I've ever heard, the pain choking in my chest. Dad cradled me in his arms that following night, Mom besides us. Teddy's words echoing in my mind. _"I'll get you to a hospital. I promise." _His promise happened, but I always thought he would be next to me.

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…. Hate me? Don't forget too..

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(PS! I have a dentist appointment tomorrow and I feel like I'll have a cavity :P If I do, Mom will probably take my stuff away for a while. If she does. I will update when she gives it back. Or I'll try to write another chapter tonight. Sorry!)


	36. Funeral

WARNING: sad stuff. VERY SAD STUFF!

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Chapter Thirty-Six: Funeral (Julia's POV)

The short black dress hugged my hips and thighs, I wore fishnets underneath with combat boots. Mom didn't approve, but Dad had stopped her, he always stopped her when she was about to scold me for something. Neither of them yelled or shouted at me in the past week, and I know why. It's because of Teddy, his death. They think it's affected me to where I could snap and have a breakdown. Well I haven't and I won't. My sobbing escape was at the hospital after Dad broke the news to me, that was it. I haven't cried or spoken of it since. Then again I don't really talk anymore. I stared at myself in the mirror, my hair was straighten, it just laid there on my shoulders and my makeup was heavily done. Heavy eyeliner, heavy eye shadow, and dark red lipstick I stole from Mom's jewelry box. I may look like a hooker, but I didn't care. I slowly turned and to look out my window. To see that the sky was grey and dark, it was going to rain. To be a rainy and gloomy day on Teddy's funeral. He'd hate it, but go along with it because I like darkness over the sun. "Julia?" Dad asked softly. I looked over my shoulder to see him standing in the doorway awkwardly. He was wearing a black undershirt with a black blazer and black tie. "Yeah." I said, my voice was flat. No emotion. "The car's ready. We're leaving." Dad said. I nodded and spun on my heel heading in Dad's direction, I felt his hands on my shoulders. Keeping me put. "Are you feeling well enough, Julia?" Dad whispered, I felt him gently check the bandage around my neck, the wrappings around my forearm and the stitches on my cheek. "Yeah." I said again. I didn't have more to say. "You don't look okay. Did you take your pain medication?" Dad asked, his eyes filled with concern. "Did you take your insanity injection?" I snapped. Dad dropped his hold on my shoulders, hurt taking in his eyes. Dad didn't say a word as he turned around and exited the room, mumbling. "Come out when your ready, Jules." Dad walked down the stairs, leaving me. I immediately kicked myself, I'm such an idiot! More like a bitch, but saying that to Dad? How can I be so heartless, he's so sensitive when it comes to that and I just spit in the most venomous tone? How can I not have a heart? How can I be such a.. ass to my own Dad. He's been going out of his way for me, standing up for me and making sure that Mom won't scold me. I've been treated like an angel around here, when really I've been acting like a uptight bitch. Than again.. I've always been one. I sighed and recomposed myself, I slowly walked down the hallway and placed a hand on the railing as I walked down the staircase slowly. Dad, Mom, Willow and Bentley were waiting down there, each of their eyes stared at me, I wanted to snap something vicious to each of them, but clamped down on my jaw. I wouldn't say a word, I wouldn't hurt another. I brushed past them and headed for the door, I didn't say a word as I approached the car and climbed into the back, I kept my hands in my lap, My nails chipping at each other, making loud noises. Many times, Mom turned around to say something, but Dad put a hand on her arm, keeping her from yelling at me. The car ride was peaceful, no one said a word to each other. Dad drove, Mom looked out the window, Willow was texting Ian and Bentley was playing with a piece of string from his pants. I sat there, staring at my ragged fingernails. They were painted black, but the black was put on too thick on one fingernail or too thin on another, It was done last night and I was shaking. Shaking from nerves and fear. I hadn't been able to control either, I couldn't control my own body. That scared the shit out of me. I felt the car ease to a stop and I looked up to see that we were here already at the Church. I scoffed and Willow turned to look at me. "Okay there Jules?" Willow asked, her brows raising. I shook my head and exited the car. If I would've known it was a church, I would've stayed home. Dad quickly stood by me. "Sorry Jules. I forgot to tell you that Jess arranged it in a church." Dad said in a hushed voice. I know that secretly he hates it too, I'm only a atheist because Dad and Mom had me choose when I was eleven, giving me good and bad on both. I figured atheist was better, you didn't believe in a damn thing. Plus I got to stay home on Sunday's with Dad while Mom took Willow and Bentley to church. I didn't say a word as I brushed past Dad and entered the church. I didn't take the Holy Water and bless myself and others like Teddy's family did. I felt a ache in my chest, I stopped where I was to put a hand on my chest, I hadn't felt this in a while. I never felt this. "You okay Julia?" Mom whispered. I felt her hands on my shoulders. I nodded quickly and entered the church, already some pews were taken in the front, I made my way to take a seat on a pew, but I felt cool hands grasp mine. I looked up to see it was Jess. She had puffy eyes and quivering lips. "Julia?" Jess whispered. I nodded. I felt her quickly latch onto me in a grasp. "Thank you. Thank you so much for loving my Teddy. For being there for my Teddy when I couldn't." Jess sobbed. I gently patted her back as she hung onto me. "Teddy was such a good boy. I didn't know Lilith would do such a thing." Jess whispered as she let go of me, but held onto my hands. "Lilith's dead you know." Jess whispered. My head shot up, if I were a dog, my ears would perk up as well. "Police found her body near Ajax, she killed herself with a gun. Right to the chest." Jess said in a choked cry. My lips parted and I was about to apologize, but I didn't. Lilith was gone, I should be doing backflips and having a ball. But I'm not. I feel absolute pity for Jess, her husband's in prison for life and her children are dead. Jess has no one. "I just wanted to thank you Julia. My Teddy needed love before he died." Jess whispered. I felt her kiss my cheek and patting the stitched one lightly before scurrying off to others. I felt a arm link through mine and I looked to see it was Yvonne. She was dressed in a velvet black dress, black heels, black earrings, black necklace. Black everything. This is what I hated about funerals, everyone wore depressing colors. "I'm just taking you to where Eli and Clare are, Julia." Yvonne said softly. I didn't say a word as Yvonne led me to where my family was, I took a seat next to Dad and Yvonne took the seat next to me. There was hushed whispers around me, but I didn't listen. I couldn't comprehend it at all. I was numb.

"Julia! Julia! Honey just please calm down!" Mom shouted. The tears were pouring from my eyes profusely. I couldn't see anything that wasn't blurry. What had come over me, I felt the rain pour onto me as I was on the ground, sobbing. People were surrounding me, some to help, others to watch Teddy's psychotic girlfriend finally crack. Finally Dad had me in his arms, strong and warm. I just continued to sob on the wet grass, Dad holding me, Mom and Yvonne trying to soothe me. One thing I saw that wasn't blurry was Jess, she had a Rosary in her hand was praying. I kept hearing the same words over and over, my name in the prayer. I was being prayed for. This only made me cry more.

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See? Lilith was the one to commit suicide. I happened to shorten the story a bit, there will be 39 chapters. SORRY! I was going to have 41 but it didn't turn out that way. Don't forget too..REVIEW?


	37. Proposal

WARNING: CUTE STUFF! NOTHING SAD! :D

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Chapter Thirty-Seven: Proposal (Clare's POV)

_A Month Later:_

"You look gorgeous, Clare." Alli swooned with a smile. I turned my head to see Alli was sitting on me and Eli's bed, her legs crossed showing her toned dark legs. She was wearing a black dress, her hair in a bun on her head, only a few strands were curled to cup her face. I smirked and looked back to at the mirror to see myself wearing a tight waisted blue dress, the bottom was poofed out. The reddish brown locks were as always loose curls around my head, a blue bow poking out from the top. I wore black heels to compliment the touch of black in my dress. "You think so Alli? I think you look better." I complimented Alli. "I think you look beautiful, Clare." A deep voice said from the doorway. I turned my head to see Eli was standing in the doorway. Wearing a white undershirt with a black tie and black blazer. His signature smirk on his face. I felt the heat rush to my cheeks and ears and I looked down. "I'll be waiting in the car with the others." Alli chirped before quickly leaving with her clicking heels. I felt strong and warm arms circle around my waist. I smiled brightly and looked into the mirror to see me and Eli. His embrace around my torso. "I say we both still look like teenagers." Eli murmured in my ear. I giggled. Of course we didn't look young anymore. I had gained a few wrinkles, as did Eli, but I still saw ourselves as teenagers. "We've got another ten years of looking hot. After that we look like shit to everyone." Eli said lowly. I snorted and Eli chuckled. "Cute. Very cute." Eli whispered. I felt his warm lips trace my neck to the edge of my lips. I faintly feel the press of his lips to the edge of mine before he pulled away. "You'll get more tonight." Eli promised. I felt his arms drop from my waist, his hand grabbing mine and slowly pulling me from the mirror. "Our first high school reunion. Who'll be there?" I wondered. Eli chuckled. "Most importantly, will anyone be shocked to see us still together after twenty years?" Eli wondered. "I don't think so." A voice said. I looked up to see that Julia was standing there, a photo book in her hand. "You guys were very cute together." Julia complimented as she flipped page through page of me and Eli. "Thanks Jules." I thanked. "Thanks for staying home to watch Will and Bents too." Eli added. Julia nodded and closed the book. "I have nothing to do on a Friday night anymore either." Julia said, her voice in a monotone. I felt Eli's grasp on my hand drop and I saw him approach Julia. He held her chin up and wiped a tear that fell from her eye. "Remember what I told you Jules?" Eli whispered. Julia gulped and nodded, blinking fast. "Time heals all wounds?" Julia whispered. Eli nodded, a playful smile on his lips. "That a girl." Eli said lovingly. Julia smirked. A moment of silence before Julia mock punched Eli. "Now get out of here and have a blast with Mom." Julia said, her voice more playful than I've heard in a while. "We will." Eli promised. I saw Eli look over his shoulder and wink at me. I furrowed my brows, he was planning something. He always plans something.

"Can you believe Drew Torres married Heather Paulette?" Alli whispered harshly. I looked in Alli's direction to see her glaring at Drew holding Heather, his arm around her waist, holding her close. "I bet she still smells like Salami." Adam sneered by me. I looked over at him and Eli was already fist bumping him for that one. I rolled my eyes and felt a tap on my shoulder. I looked up to see Connor. "Connor?" I gasped. It didn't even look like Connor. Connor had no glasses and was even taller than graduation. "Wow Clare. You still look gorgeous." Connor complimented. I quickly hugged Connor and heard someone clear their throat, I let go of Connor to see Eli had his arm around my waist, hugging me close. "Eli? You and Clare still married?" Connor asked, after having a firm handshake with Eli. Eli shrugged. "A lot has happened Connor. We.. Divorced, but we're back together." Eli explained. Connor's eyes widen. "Wow." Connor breathed. Us three stood awkwardly, until Connor cleared his throat. "I'm happy for you two. Really I am." Connor concluded. I smiled. "Thanks Connor. Do you have a wife?" I asked. Connor blushed a bit and called. "Keisha!" Suddenly a tall dark skinned woman appeared. She had shoulder length black hair and dark brown eyes. A friendly smile appeared on her lips. "Hello." Keisha said formally. "I'm Clare and this is Eli, my husband." I said, Connor's eyebrows furrowed. I quickly corrected myself. "I mean.. boyfriend?" I said awkwardly. It felt weird calling Eli a boyfriend, all these years he's been my husband. "Nice to meet you two. Connor, Wesley is over there. There is a jumpy guy named Dave too." Keisha said oddly. Connor rolled his eyes. "I'll see you guys later." Connor said before walking off with Keisha and walking towards Wesley and Dave. I looked up at Eli and smiled. "Well isn't this a night? Drew married Heather, Connor has a wife. What's next? Bianca has a daughter?" Eli joked. I giggled and looked around seeing that it was pretty full in here. "Can we go off and have time to ourselves?" Eli whispered in my ear. I blushed. Still the same Eli. "Sure." I whispered. Soon Eli had me brushing past people to get to the exit, we finally exited the community school and found ourselves in front of the school. The clear and fresh air on our faces. I took a deep breath and smiled. "This is feeling so familiar." I whispered. I couldn't quite put my tongue on it, but this place and scene was familiar. Eli chuckled. I felt his warm arms circle around my waist and hold me close. His kisses leaving warm marks on my neck, I smiled wider with each kiss on my neck, trailing up on my jaw and to my mouth. Our lips connected and I fell into a teenage lust battle. His lips warm and rough against mine. I loved the feeling, the feeling of Eli's lips against mine made my world stop. Like it was only us. The kiss broke and I looked into Eli's eager emerald eyes. The same emerald eyes that grabbed my attention the first day we met. "You know, this is the place where I ran over your glasses." Eli murmured against my skin. I smiled. "I remember. I was about to scold you for ruining them, but.." I trailed off, my mind seeping into that day. Eli chuckled. "You were too intrigued by my outer shell huh?" Eli whispered. I nodded. It was Eli's outer shell and hearse that attracted me to him. His aura was dark, yet it was alluring. I couldn't drive myself away. "Clare. Remember how I told you on graduation day how much I loved you and how you mean so much to me?" Eli whispered. I smiled remembering his face, how beautiful he looked in his blue gown. He was perfection that night. "I remember. Why bring it up Eli?" I asked. Suddenly Eli's arms unwound around me and I found him on the ground, on one knee. One of his hands lapsed onto mine. "Clare Diane _Goldsworthy_. I know that I've been a fuck up. I've always been a fuck up, but I just need to know. I desperately need to know." I felt the tears sting in my eyes. He couldn't be-he wouldn't. Eli than gently kissed my emerald ring with his lips. "Will you marry this fuck up again?" The cool air danced around us in a frenzy, a cool air to remember.

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CLIFFHANGER! Only two more chapters! D: SORRY! Don't forget too..

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	38. Black Wedding

WARNING: CUTE STUFF. FLUFF. XD

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Chapter Thirty-Eight: Black Wedding (Eli's POV)

_Five Months Later: _

The lights shone on the blackness of the afternoon. Below the sunshine was a very black parade. Very reminding of My Chemical Romance. Instead this time, there was a joining of two souls again.. Although these souls were connected from the moment, I, the basket case had ran over her, the angel's glasses with Morty.. My hearse.. Well Julia's now. Black tablecloth's draped over the tables for the reception area, black carpet rolled out for the bride's entrance, white chair with black roses strung on the chairs. A black arch that was above me and Jay. Jay Hogart to be exact. I looked back at him and his receding hairline, he nodded at me. "How many people have you married off?" I asked, looking at Jay. Jay smirked. "A lot. The memorable ones were marrying my best friend Spinner to Emma and doing my own marriage." Jay chuckled. I furrowed my brows. "You got yourself and your wife married?" I asked. Jay nodded. "Married Manuela Santos-Hogart. Ah, the best fucking day of my life." Jay sighed. I smiled, and looked at the audience. Clare's family sat on the right, mine sat on the left. Mom and Lizzy front row, a smile plastered on both their faces. Mom's aging face was pulled from age with her youthful smile on her face and Lizzy smiled turned into a smirk. Our signature smirk. "Nervous?" Adam quipped to me, I looked to my left to see my best friend standing there, his black beanie on. I furrowed my brows. "Not really.. I've done this before." I said. Adam sighed, "That's too bad.. Because I am." Adam admitted. I smirked. "Are you serious? You weren't nervous twenty years ago." I reminded Adam. Adam smiled nervously. "Well I am now. Can't help it. Eli." Adam said. "Nothing to worry about. I'm just remarrying the love of my life. No big deal." I said. Although saying the words and realizing them had me breaking spots of sweat on my forehead. I gulped, seeing the numerous rows of people before us. _Now _I got nervous. Sure I was nervous the first time, but I've done this. Not that hard. Just remember your vows and kiss the pretty girl. Easy. Except this was Clare. I didn't want to screw this up for her. Not many people marry the same person twice. Although my thoughts were cut short by the organ music starting and people walking down the aisle. Adam had left his post by me and was now walking down the aisle with Fiona on his arm. I smiled seeing how far Adam and Fiona had come. Adam started out such a scared and quiet kid, yet he has grown into a brave man. I feel so blessed to see him marry Fiona, to be there when he proposed, to be there when married her, to be there to see him holding his twin baby girls. The bliss on his face. A best friend for life can be rare to find so soon, I was lucky. _Too lucky. _Next down the aisle was Dave and Alli, I wasn't too close to them, but I've grown with them. Dave was never my favorite person and to this day he still annoys the shit out of me, but I've learned to know that's who he is. Than Alli, she was like a sister, same went for Fiona and Jenna. I'd be quick to stop anyone from hurting them. Suddenly as Dave and Alli parted ways to the separate sides, it showed Clare. She gracefully walked down the path of red rose petals, her blue dress having black roses printed around the lower part. A blue rose took place in her reddish brown curls. She looked radiant. Beautiful. Amazing. Just amazing. This was mine. She was mine. I was never letting this slip from my fingertips again. Never again. As Clare reached me, I gave her my arm, Clare gladly took it with a small smile. "We find each other here again, English partner." Clare whispered. A smirk swept across my face. "Touché English partner. Touché." I whispered back. Clare's cheeks flushing with red. I listened to Jay's words as he began with "Ladies and Gentleman, we are gathered here today with the reunion of Elijah Goldsworthy and Clare Goldsworthy, yes these two dumbshit divorced and decided to get remarried." Jay joked. Chuckles and giggles swept through the audience. I could even hear Julia's small giggle in the front row, making my grin grow bigger. "Now. Let's start this shit." Jay announced. A huge cocky smile on his lips. A small voice told me to never hire Jay Hogart as my priest. Than again, I've never heard so many laughs at a wedding before in my life.

"Would you care to dance, Edwards?" I asked. Clare rolled her eyes. "I do prefer Goldsworthy, Goldsworthy." Clare stated with a small smile. I smirked and pulled Clare into a dance as the slow song's lyrics floated around every couple. Slowly but surely, more couples entered the dance floor. I noticed Adam pulling Fiona into a tight dance, Dave attempting to dance with Alli and constantly stepping on her toes, and Daniel and Jenna have a simple and cute dance with twirls. "Clare… Look." I whispered. Clare and I both stared to see Bentley was dancing with a girl, a girl with tight brown curls flowing around her. She had dark brown eyes and a bit of a tan. Her face and dancing reminded me greatly of a person I knew. "Clare? Eli?" A accented voice asked. I turned around to see Bianca De Sousa before me. A older Bianca. Her hair was curled, tight curls. Not so heavy makeup like I seemed to remember. She was wearing a smile on her lips. "Congratulations." Bianca congratulated. I allowed a small smile to surface my lips. "Your welcome, Bianca. What are you doing here?" I asked. Bianca swallowed. "I was invited by your son, Bentley. He invited me and my daughter, his friend, Rosalie." I turned my head to see Bentley and Rosalie still dancing. Rosalie's face in full view, she had a great deal of her looks from Bianca, but her smile.. It was familiar. "In case you've already noted, Fitz is her father." Clare's grip on my hand tightened. "Fitz?" Clare whispered. Bianca nodded. "Hooking up with Fitz was not smart, but.. Rose is a gift. A true gift." Bianca said sweetly. This was the sweetest I've ever heard from Bianca. The backstabbing, cheating, bitch I knew from high school. "I never did apologize for breaking you two up like twenty years ago. I'm sorry." Bianca apologized. I nodded. "It's cool, Bianca. As you see, me and Clare are happy. I suspect you are too?" I asked. Bianca nodded. "I am seeing a guy named James. I'm hoping he can be a good father to Rose. She deserves one after the hell she's gone through." Bianca said absent mindedly. A story behind her words. I looked back to Bentley and Rosalie dancing, a smile on my son's lips as Rosalie planted a kiss on his cheek. "Am I the only one who see's a relationship in the making here?" Bianca whispered. Clare shook her head. "I see it." Clare said, a smile breaking across her lips. "Well.. It was good catching up with you guys." Bianca said. I nodded. "Same here, Bianca. I guess we'll be seeing a lot of each other in the future?" I asked. Bianca smiled and nodded. "I do hope so, emo boy." Using my old nickname I hated. Bianca rolled her eyes. "You know I don't mean it, Eli." Bianca stated. I nodded. "I know. I won't call you Satan then. Deal?" I asked. Bianca laughed. "Deal Eli." Then Bianca walked off to other people. I looked across the dance floor and my eyes landed on Julia. Julia was dancing with another guy. "You see that?" I murmured. Clare whipped her head back to see what I was seeing. Clare smiled softly. "Yes." Clare said. I saw clearly as a guy with short brown hair, and light brown eyes twirled my daughter around. I smirked. "At least she's moving on." I said. Clare nodded. "I did worry about that.. But it seems like she's enjoying the dance." Clare observed. I saw as a smile was being worn on Julia's lips as this guy dipped her in the dance, a volcano of giggles erupted from her mouth. I wrapped my arms around Clare's waist. "This is good." I murmured. Clare leaned her head into my chest. "This is good." Clare repeated. Quickly I twirled Clare and she gasped. "Eli!" Clare shouted. I chuckled. "I wasn't done with my dance, Edwards." I quipped. Clare giggled and I pulled her into a dance that continued as the stars reached the blackness of the sky. Two twinkling stars looking down.

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SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN TEN DAYS D: I've been busy and ONLY ONE CHAPTER LEFT! I will start writing IMMEADIATELY, so I'll have it out soon! Don't forget too..

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	39. Pretenders

WARNING: IT'S THE END. OH DEAR IT'S THE END D:

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Chapter Thirty-Nine: Pretenders (Julia's POV) [Final Chapter]

_A Week Later:_

How do I always find myself in front of a window watching a thunderstorm? I always do find myself here. Staring at the lightening bolts soar across the sky and touch the night sky. I watch as the thunder rumbles through the world, shaking our heads. I rest my head on my knees and sigh. The storm was beautiful. Just beautiful. No matter how many times Yvonne will call me crazy for watching them, I will always love them. A soft knock was at my door. "Come in." I said softly. I already had an idea of who it was. "I knew I'd find you by the window." Dad said lowly. I smiled and nodded. "Like always. I can't ever be asleep during a thunderstorm. I feel like I'm missing out." I admitted. Dad chuckled and sat next to me, I looked at him to see a smirk plastered on his face. Such an improvement of happiness since our tragedies. These last two years have been hell. Absolute hell. "I feel responsible for the reason you never sleep during thunderstorms." Dad admitted. I shook my head. "Don't. Would you rather have a daughter who watches thunderstorms like a freak or have a daughter sleeping in your bedroom with you and mom?" I questioned Dad. Dad paused and contemplated. I giggled and playfully hit his arm. "Your not seriously thinking about that are you?" I asked. Dad's lips broke into a grin. "Whatever makes you happy, Jules. You don't need to ask me." Dad assured me. I nodded. "My happiness means a lot to you." I whispered, watching a bound of thunder crash in the skies. "You're my daughter, Jules. Your happiness means everything. I don't want to see you unhappy or depressed. I want to see you smile and always have a bright mind." Dad explained. "Was it hard.. Seeing me after.." I took a pause, I knew I had too. Dad didn't pressure me. "Was it hard seeing me after.. Teddy's death?" I whispered, my voice clinging on Teddy's a while longer than the other words. Dad sighed and nodded. "You were.. Hopeless Jules. You had no light in your eyes or in your words. Every move you made it seemed force, like you didn't want to do anything, but lay in your bed and stare at the ceiling. You gradually got better, after the funeral, you spoke up more often, you cried more often. You showed more emotion. Then you were becoming Julia again. You were able to say Teddy's name without choking up and bawling. You were able to stare at his picture and not collapse on your knees and cry. You were becoming stronger." Dad explained. I closed my eyes and after a while, I opened them to see the stars finally emerging a tad bit. "Was it hard after your Julia's death?" I whispered. Dad nodded. "It was hell. I wouldn't talk. At all. I was a mute. For months I was a mute. Finally I would talk, say little things and gradually I was able to talk to everyone in complete sentences, its just that no one brought up Julia. I wasn't ready to hear her name or stare at her picture for a long time without bawling like a little boy. In a way to make me open up more, my family moved here and I was enrolled at Degrassi." Dad explained, his voice sounded a bit pained on Julia's name. "Where you met Mom." I stated, remembering them meeting there. Dad nodded, a smile playing on his lips. "I met your mom and everything changed. She brought light on my life. Shone it down on me and made me see clearer through the darkness that Julia's death had brought upon me. She changed my perspective of life." Dad murmured. "Do you still miss her?" I asked. Dad paused, and nodded. "Everyday." Dad said, using just one word, not continuing on the subject. "Does Mom know?" I questioned. Dad nodded. "Of course. When I have nightmares of her or see her, I ask your mother if she's okay with this, she says there is enough room in my heart for her and Julia." Dad explained. "Then you still love her." I stated, my voice sounded odd, like it didn't sound right. "Of course I do. I'll always love Julia. But I love your mother as well. I love both of them. I couldn't choose who I loved more, because both mean a hell of a lot to me." Dad stated. "You'll always love Teddy, Jules. That will never change." Dad added. I gulped. "Even if I'm going on a date with Sam?" I whispered. Remembering Sam Nathanson, at the wedding, a friend of Victoire's who had come. He asked me to dance and I didn't refuse, his brown eyes were filled with hope and desire. Dad chuckled. "Of course. If you begin a relationship with Sam, you'll think of Teddy. If you ever move farther into things with Sam, you'll think of Teddy. You'll love them both." Dad said. I nodded. We were both silent staring at thunderstorm slowly start to end, showing more of the stars twinkling in the sky. "Don't pretend that you don't miss Teddy, Jules. Don't ever lie and say you don't miss him, because you do and always will." Dad reminded me. I smirked and looked out into the two twinkling stars. "Coming from the daughter of the Pretenders, I tend to Make Believe."

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ITS OVER D: I just want to thank EVERYONE who has supported this story and the sequel since the beginning. I've gotten more reviews and more favorites on this story than the Pretenders. This was an amazing journey with this story. I just love it :D. There will be no other sequel, this is it. It leaves you with an open ending. There is that boy Sam, Julia might see. Who knows if that works out. Then there is Rosalie, who knows if Bentley ever dates her. It's open ended. Then I also left out a part I never addressed. When Willow blacked out and broke her leg, I never said who did it. I never will, but there is hints who did. Just guess. SHE is in the story. Again, I thank EVERYONE for helping make this story what it is. I will post the soundtrack after this and be done with this story. ADD ME AS A FAVORITE AUTHOR IF YOU WANT TO READ MORE OF MY NEW STORIES. I do have new story ideas in my profile. So I'll start on those and see what happens with that. THANKS AGAIN. I love you guys. Don't forget too..REVIEW?


	40. Make Believe Soundtrack

Make Believe Soundtrack:

1: Make Believe by Metro Station

2: Kiss With A Fist by Florence + The Machine

3: What If This Storm Ends by Storm Patrol

4: Funeral by Band Of Horses

5: Your Ex Lover Is Dead by Stars

6: Sleeping Sickness by City and Colour

7: Savior by Rise Against (Eli's Theme)

8: It Will Be Me by Mellissa Ethridge

9: Iris (Acoustic) by Goo Goo Dolls

10: Shattered by Trading Yesterday

11: Hallelujah by Kate Voegele

12: Rooftops by Melissa McClelland

13: No Sound But The Wind by Editors

14: Through The Trees by Low Shoulder

15: Ride by Cary Brothers

16: Confessions Of A Broken Heart (Father To Daughter) by Lindsey Lohan (Eli and Julia's Theme)

17: Only One by Alex Band

18: Running Up That Hill by Placebo

19: Invisible by Jonas Brothers

20: I'm Kissing You by Des'ree (Teddy and Julia's Theme)

21: River Flows In You by Yiruma

22: Feel This by Bethany Joy Galeotti

23: The Pretenders by The Foo Fighters (Eli and Clare's Theme)

What Each Song Means:

1: Make Believe, first off the song is not based off the title, like The Pretenders, Make Believe is how Yvonne who is such a big growing character feels about Teddy when they had their relationship, like deep down Yvonne knew that Teddy had like Julia all along, her character drifting towards angry and mean to prove that her boyfriend didn't like her best friend, but eventually Yvonne has to accept that Teddy loves Julia, not her. Despite that the Yvonne/Teddy/Julia love triangle wasn't THAT big to much, it was to me.

2: Kiss With A Fist is based off the fight between Yvonne and Julia, after Yvonne finds out that Teddy was staring at Julia and her mind starts to think they hooked up at his house the day before. The lyrics explain to my laughter Julia and Yvonne slapping and punching. The song overall ACTUALLY means a fighting relationship between boyfriend/girlfriend, but lets pretend (since we're all good little pretenders) that its Yvonne/Julia's fight scene song :D

3: What If This Storm Ends is a song I use during emotional scenes, I always need slow songs to persuade more depth writing from me. But deep down the song revolves around Teddy and Julia and how Teddy feels about if he continues on getting abused, he'll never see Julia. _"What if this storm ends and I don't see you. As you are now. Ever again. A perfect halo, of gold hair and lightning." _Sure the gold hair is nothing compared to Julia, but lightning is connected to Thunderstorms, which Julia loves. A very emotional and raw song for me to use. Many of you might see it on other play lists/soundtracks for other stories of mine.

4: Funeral is the song I use when Teddy is being buried at his funeral. The lyrics may have nothing to do with Julia or Teddy, but the song seems to fit for me. The way Julia is feeling when her boyfriend is being buried because his little sister had killed him. Eli being there for his emotional daughter. Overall. I enjoy this song and might even use it again. If I ever need it..

5: Your Ex Lover Is Dead was used on Degrassi, the episode when Paige, Alex, Ellie, Marco graduated, I used this song when Clare and Eli are dancing at their second wedding, Ian and Willow joining, Bentley and Rosalie, Julia longing for Teddy to appear from the dead to ask her to dance, instead a cute boy in her year named Sam asks her to dance, Julia agrees. I think of this song being one of the happy songs on this soundtrack of sadness, having a happy Eli/Clare wedding moment and Julia starting to show that opening to other relationships may be hard, but not bad.

6: Sleeping Sickness is used for when Eli's alone at the mental asylum. I like to think while I wrote what Clare and Julia were going through hell together, Eli was alone. Only comforted by his sane mind. He was allowed no visitors. Like the lyrics _"Someone come, and someone come and save my life." _Is Eli's basic plea that he wants ANYONE to come to save him.

7: Savior is used as how Clare's helping Eli through his schizophrenia. Many of the lyrics as this one, _"That's when she says I don't hate you boy, I just want to save you, while there's still something still left to save." _Is Clare saying she doesn't hate Eli after their divorce, she still wants to save what's left of Eli, the boy she met in her sophomore year that changed her complete life. Some lyrics can be used in Eli's perspective as well.

8: It Will Be Me is Teddy helping Julia through her going through hell after his death. Saying that when he dies and she needs anyone that she calls out, he comes for her, and it's also used for when Teddy needs a person after his beating and Julia appears to help him.

9: Iris is used for Teddy and Julia's first kiss in the back of Morty after Julia tells Teddy about her Mom divorcing her Dad. Teddy and Julia share a kiss that leads to teenage sex. Despite that Julia had sex because she felt like she had too, it still meant a lot to her. Also some lyrics can be about Julia thinking of how the world would view her as a mess.

10: Shattered is used for when Eli and Clare have to break the news of Teddy's death to Julia. Very emotional of Julia's reaction changing from shocked and blank to full out bawling.

11: Hallelujah was a song I used while Clare was falling down the stairs during her pregnancy and felt the pain of Munro dying, Julia coming from her room and stabbing Eli in the neck to knock him out. The song was also used during the time everyone was in the waiting room, awaiting for Julia to break down and cry upon the things she saw that night.

12: No Sound But The Wind was a song that was used in New Moon (any Twilight fans remember?) I used this song while Teddy and Julia were kidnapped by Lilith, showing that Lilith was true insanity compared to Eli (In Julia's mind)

13: Through The Trees was a song featured in Jennifer's Body (remember that freaky ass movie?) I used this song during Julia and Yvonne mending their friendship, I enjoy Yvonne and Julia's friendship more than Clare and Alli's because Yvonne and Julia are based off of many friendships girl's go through now, ending a friendship over a boy, Weird how this song was used for Needy and Jennifer in Jennifer's Body. Such a friendship mending song.

14: Ride was a song I used during Eli and Clare trying to find Julia and Teddy after they disappeared. The lyrics _"You are everything I ever wanted the scars of all I've ever known" _Is Eli wanting Clare back as he studies her during their search.

15: Confessions Of A Broken Heart was a song I used for Eli and Julia's moments after he shows who he truly is, much like the scenes during at the mental asylum and when she visits him at his new apartment. This is possibly one of the songs I like of Lindsey Lohan.. Odd..

16: Only One is a song I used while Julia finally realized that she loved Teddy during his stay at the hospital.

17: Running Up That Hill is a song I used for Clare admitting to Eli that if she could, she'd swap places with Eli so he wouldn't have to be in such pain all the time.

18: Invisible is used for while Teddy is in the park and is thinking of Julia and coming to terms that he likes her and always has, then Julia appears after storming from her house.

19: I'm Kissing You is used for a lot of love scenes for my story, its main purpose is for during Eli and Clare's second wedding and flashbacks enter Eli's mind about Clare and their relationship. I pretty much cry during this song. I'm such a softie.

20: River Flows In You is a song I used for when Clare tells Eli that she wants to divorce him, leaving Eli lifeless and alone.

21: Feel This is a song I used at the last chapter, when Julia is telling Eli how she'll never forget Teddy just like how Eli thinks of Julia everyday, Julia says that one day she'll marry a guy like Eli married Clare and she'll be happy, but she'll always love Teddy and she knows it isn't wrong. It's love.

22: The Pretenders… How can I not use this song? I like to think if my story was ever a movie.. This song would be the ending credits, but the main purpose of this song is on The Pretender's Soundtrack!

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Yes I didn't include Rooftops. SORRY. It is a good song and wasn't on the play list because no one ever uploaded it on there. So its sort of included sort of not. DO ENJOY THIS PLAYLIST :D


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